With Caution: With or Without, Book 2 (9 page)

That was just it, Remi didn’t know how he felt. He liked Jake…a lot. Tugging his hand away from Chay, Remi set his can down. He couldn’t imagine not ever seeing Jake again. His breath hitched. The thought of never seeing Jake again made his chest hurt.

He dropped his head to his hands. “I didn’t even think about the fact that he was a guy at the time. It felt like the most natural thing in the world to do. Like I was in a trance or something, where nothing mattered but the two of us. All I could think about was needing him and—”
pleasing him
. “Fuck!” Groaning, Remi sat up, pulling at his hair. “What the hell am I going to do?”

“What can you do?” Chay shrugged. “You have to ask yourself what’s important. If you don’t have a problem with it, you can deal with the rest. Trust me, it’s not impossible, I know.”

Remi felt raw, open, like a bug under a microscope. His shoulders slumped. Instead of feeling better about the situation, it seemed even more hopeless. “What happens if you do ignore it?”

Chay closed his eyes for a minute and let out a breath. When he opened them, his eyes were haunted. “You mean
if
you can? Then you learn to live with only half your soul.”

* * *

Jake motioned for the bartender to pour him another one. How could he have screwed up so badly? He should have stopped Remi from blowing him.

“You look like shit.” Rhys sat on the barstool next to him and waved down the bartender.

“Thanks.” Jake groaned. So much for drinking alone to clear his mind. “What are you doing here?”

The bartender came back, poured Jake another scotch and wiped down the bar in front of Rhys. “What’ll it be?”

“Bud Light.” Rhys turned to Jake. “I’m meeting Dago and Gadget for a couple games of pool and some beer. What are you doing here? I thought you’d be with Remi.”

Snorting, Jake took a sip of his scotch. “Fucked up.”

Rhys arched a brow.

“He freaked after giving me a blowjob.”

“Giving you a blowjob is fucked up? Shit, if that has you fucked up, hand him over.”

Jake growled. He knew Rhys was pulling his chain, but the thought of giving Remi up didn’t sit well. “The blowjob wasn’t what was fucked up. Him freaking out afterward was. You aren’t helping, smartass.”

“Fine, I’m all ears, tell me what happened.”

“I rushed things. I even blurted out that we were mates.” Jake was still shocked he’d done that. He’d done so well, keeping that from Remi, not wanting to scare him off. Shit, maybe that was the problem. Maybe he should have told Remi upfront. Remi could have been getting used to the idea.
Oh hell
, Jake didn’t know anymore. The constant what if’s and should I’s where Remi was concerned were all starting to run together.

“So back off. Let him come to you. Keep working on the case, but keep it professional.” Rhys took his beer from the bartender. “Thanks.”

“Spoken like a man without a mate.”

“Just trying to help, asshole. If you’re gonna be pissy, I’ll go wait for the guys somewhere else.”

“Sorry. You’re probably right. What else can I do? But it sucks. The whole situation sucks.”

“Hey, Jake. Rhys.”

Jake turned as Dago clapped him on the back and slid onto the barstool beside him.

“Hey, man. How’s it going?” Jake slugged his friend’s shoulder.

Diego, or Dago as his friends called him, was part Italian, part Latino. He was also pack. Dago and Jake had been friends in school and hunted together since they’d both shifted for the first time. Dago was normally a happy, outgoing guy, unless you got that Latino temper riled.

Dago’s brown eyes twinkled and a smile crept across his face, making the dimple in his right cheek pop out. “Not bad. So tell me, when are we going to get to meet him? He’s important enough to ditch us for, we should meet him, huh, Rhys?” He glanced around Jake, meeting Rhys’ gaze.

Jake groaned. “No clue. He’s not speaking to me at the moment.”

Dago hissed out a breath. “Shit. Sorry, man.”

Jake shrugged. “How about you? What have you been up to? You still seeing that guy?” He’d been so busy hanging out with Remi, he hadn’t seen his friends in over a week. Which was pretty uncommon. Not only did they all hunt together on the night of a full moon, but they usually raised hell together on the weekends too. He wondered what Remi would think of his friends.

Rhys’ phone rang, drawing their attention. He snagged it from his belt and flipped it open. “Hello?”

Jake turned back to Dago.

Motioning to the bartender, Dago smiled. “Coors,” he told the bartender before focusing on Jake. “Yeah. I’ve seen him four times in the past week.”

Ah damn.
The guy in question was human. Jake frowned. “You gotta be careful with that shit, man. What if you get carried away? Or shift during a scene?”

“Yeah, I know, I know.” Dago sighed. “I’ve been careful. So far, I’ve kept control over myself. I haven’t even stayed all night.” He didn’t sound exactly happy about it.

Frankly, Jake couldn’t blame him. He’d never much cared about spending an entire night with any lover, but with Remi… Jake wondered briefly if Dago’s new top could be his mate. Nah, probably not, Dago would know. Jake had known the instant he’d gotten close to Remi.

“Well shit. That was Gadget, he’s not going to make it.” Rhys flipped his phone shut with a snap. “You gonna hang around, Jake?”

What else did he have to do? Sit and brood over Remi? The situation wasn’t going to change anytime soon. Then again, he wasn’t likely to quit thinking about Remi anytime soon either. “Yeah. Go get us a table. I’ll kick your ass at nine ball before I head out.”

Dago bumped his side. “Cheer up, man. Things will work out. Why don’t you meet us here tomorrow night? The whole gang will be here. It will take your mind off things.”

Jake got up, taking his scotch with him. He’d been neglecting his friends. “Yeah, I’ll come tomorrow. You think about what I said though. Lots of bad shit can happen if someone finds out what you are.”

“Yeah, I know, man.” Dago walked next to him, headed toward the pool table Rhys had confiscated.

Jake knew the feeling, his own love life wasn’t exactly looking very promising lately.

* * *

After dropping off Sterling at home, Remi pulled into his apartment complex and parked under the awning. He climbed from his bike with his mind still whirling over Jake being his mate. If he really thought about it, like Chay said, it didn’t bother him all that much. That got to him most.

Remi took off his helmet on the way up the stairs and fumbled with his keys. Emotion and common sense still warred within him, but he found himself pushing it aside much quicker and with a lot more ease. Jake made him feel safe—the man was so in control. Remi believed in him and he couldn’t say that about a lot of people.

He wanted something like Chay and Keaton had. If Chay could deal with having a male mate and being happy, why couldn’t Remi? The other day, before reality sank in, he’d felt alive. He’d done something he’d wanted to do. He’d given in to
his
desires.

Remi unlocked the door and shut it behind him. He didn’t need the light, so he left it off. Seeing in the dark was one advantage of being a werewolf. Of course, it had disadvantages too. The biggest was that he’d given up hope that his body would ever behave around Jake.

Remi locked the front door and headed to his room. He sat on the edge of the bed and took his boots off, then removed the rest of his clothes. It was too hot for covers so he climbed into bed on top of them. Laying there staring at the ceiling, he realized he was going to have to talk to Jake. They were going to have to work something out, because Remi knew he couldn’t just walk away.

For whatever reason—whether a curse or a blessing, Remi hadn’t totally decided yet—Jake was his. His cock perked up at the thought.

Jake called to him, his size, his looks, even his voice. Remi grabbed his prick and squeezed. He could get off just listening to that voice. It was deep and sultry. The way Jake had groaned out “oh fuck” when he came… Remi moaned.

After spitting in his hand, he wrapped it around his prick and pumped slowly. His thigh muscles contracted. His cock was so engorged and red, it throbbed. Closing his eyes, he lazily slid his hand over his prick.

He thought back to last night. Oh God, being at Jake’s feet had felt right. Remi shivered, stroking a little faster. Jake had tasted incredible. Remi couldn’t remember the last time he’d come in his jeans with no stimulation whatsoever. He let his mind go, imagining Jake.

Jake stood over him, naked, sweat dripping down the planes of his wide chest. His legs were braced apart, so his cock was nearly even with Remi’s lips. “Suck me.”

Shuddering, Remi went with it. His balls drew tighter and he stroked faster. His prick was incredibly hard.

“Suck me, open your mouth and suck my cock.” Jake’s knuckles brushed across Remi’s cheek and he guided his dick into Remi’s mouth with his free hand. Jake’s cock slid through his lips.

Remi’s whole body tensed, his cock feeling hot in his hand as he pumped.

Spit dribbled down his chin as Jake thrust into his mouth over and over. He told Remi how good he was, how special. Jake pulled out from between Remi’s lips, grabbed a handful of his hair and tilted his head back. With a deep moan, he came. Semen hit Remi on the cheek.

Remi lapped at it, moving his face as much as he could, trying to taste.

“You’re mine now,” Jake growled.

“Uhh.” Remi came, his eyes snapping open. He could barely drag air into his lungs. His back arched off the bed as come hit his stomach. His legs shook and his stomach muscles quivered. His orgasm seemed to last forever.

After what felt like an eternity, he stopped shaking and relaxed back on the bed.

Something dripped onto his chin. He wiped his face and held his hand in front of him.
Dark.
He couldn’t see the color because his eyes had shifted. So had his teeth. He’d bit his lip.

He got up and went to the bathroom then grabbed a washcloth, wet it in the sink and glanced at the mirror. Green eyes stared back at him, and a red drop of blood trailed down his chin and into the white sink. “What are you doing, Remi? What if Dirk finds out?”

His reflection didn’t answer, he didn’t expect it to, but he knew the answer. Somehow or another, this was meant to be. He’d just have to trust Jake to take care of him and help him protect his brother. Aside from his fear of Dirk, Remi couldn’t come up with a good reason to ditch his mate.

Chapter Seven

Come on, Remi, get it together, you’re fighting the inevitable
. He was nervous before he ever got off his bike, but damn it, he didn’t want only half a soul.

There were enough regrets in his life, he didn’t need another. He could do this. At least he damn sure wanted to try. Battling his feelings and instincts where Jake was concerned was a losing effort. Remi didn’t want to fight anymore.

Climbing from his bike, Remi took off his helmet and put it under his arm.

Jake’s house was in a new subdivision that wasn’t complete. It was one of the nice, simple, cream-colored adobes that were popular throughout New Mexico, with a heavy wood arched door. The only other completed residence in this small cul-de-sac was two lots over to the left.

There was a frame of a structure half finished a lot down and to the right of Jake’s, but other than that, the place was undeveloped. Somehow the raw feel of the place fit Jake.

Pulling the rubber band out of his hair as he went, Remi made his way up the cobblestone walk.

Rocks, cacti and yuccas dominated the arid landscaping. It gave the place a really masculine and solitary sort of feel.

Taking a deep breath, he lifted his fist to knock. Normally, things just fell into place and felt right—natural—with Jake, but with what happened the other night… Remi hoped he hadn’t ruined the comfort level they shared.

Jake opened the door before Remi knocked. “Hey.” Smiling, he let his gaze rake over Remi like it always did. Only today, Remi felt every bit of Jake’s interest. The attention was like a lingering caress. It took his breath away and made his body tingle.

Standing there with his hand in the air and helmet under his arm, he stared.

Jake was an incredible looking man. He had the dark Apache coloring, broad shoulders and towering height. Even the way he walked with smooth purposeful strides was appealing. Chay was right. Everything about his mate called to Remi. It was terrifying and comforting at the same time. He had never had the urge to give in so completely.

Allowing the instant arousal to wash over him, and not trying to suppress it as he normally did, made it even more intense. His cock was already on its way to hard. “We’re mates.” Oh shit, had he said that out loud?

Jake grabbed Remi’s raised hand and pulled him inside before shutting the door. He didn’t let go of Remi’s hand. Instead, he backed Remi against the closed door and placed his hand on Jake’s chest. “Yes, we are. Are you okay with that?” For once, it was Jake’s eyes that shifted first, but it didn’t take Remi’s long to follow.