Pulse: A Stepbrother Romance (11 page)

The walk to Leah’s place wasn’t far at all. In fact, it was amazing that we’d never run into each other before last week.

That’s what happened when you lived in the middle of one of the largest and densest cities on earth. Squeezed into the middle of a bustling throb of humanity, it was possible to live right next door to someone and never see them even if you shared the same interests and did the same things.

Options were endless.

You’d think I’d be able to get my mind off one woman in the middle of all of this.
I walked past a few women who would have turned my head before I’d met Leah. Now they barely registered.

It should have worried me I’d dropped yet another hangout session with the crew at a moment’s notice when Leah invited me to her party. Should have, but didn’t. It was a relief to have an excuse to get away from the self-destructive behavior I’d engaged in for my entire adult life.

The apartment had more people than the last time I’d been there, and this time the gender ratio was a little more balanced—less tilted toward the feminine.

“Chris,” Leah acknowledged when she opened the door. She stepped out of the way to clear space for me to enter.

Was that on purpose so I couldn’t get close to her again?

Despite the music and the deafening roar of a couple dozen people talking in small groups in the apartment, it was as though we had our own little bubble of space and time around us in the tiny entryway.

“Congratulations,” I said. “It’s great you got the role, Leah.”

I held my arms out for a hug and grinned inwardly when she looked suspicious, as if it were a trap.

It would be weirder for her to turn down a hug from her stepbrother than it would be to accept it, so she didn’t have a choice in the matter. Her arms barely touched my back before she started to back up, but I closed tight around her and held her close for another second or two.

Her hair smelled like passionfruit and strawberries. Delicious.

When I finally let her get away, her eyes fluttered open, pupils dilated. “Thank you,” she said. Her voice got lower until I could barely hear it over the music and I had to bend my head to listen. “By the way, I’m definitely not pregnant from the little mistake we had when we first met. I finally got my period.”

It was a worry that I’d pushed to the back of my mind so deeply it took me a second to remember what she was talking about. “That’s great news!”

Despite my words, a faint disappointment filled me. At least if I’d given Leah a child there would be a link between us she couldn’t run away from.

That’s fucked up. Saddling Leah with a child she doesn’t want just so you have an excuse to see her would be the worst thing I’ve ever done.

A guy I’d never seen before ran up to us. “Leah, looks like the bathroom is out of toilet paper. Do you have more lying around somewhere?”

“Uh, yeah, one sec.” She turned back. “Make yourself at home. You know a few of the people here already.”

The fridge was full, so I shoved the six pack I brought on top and grabbed a beer out of it.

“Kevin!” I said as I recognized Leah’s fellow student standing next to me in the kitchen. He was with Sean and a few new faces, two girls and a guy. “How are you?”

“Oh, hey, Chris, good to see you again. Things are good, although exams are coming up so I’ve been practicing like a madman. I don’t think my neck has been this sore since I first played violin.” He tilted his head to the side and groaned. “At this rate I’ll get so arthritic I won’t ever be able to play again!”

“Ouch,” I said. “I’m glad that my music takes a turntable and keyboard. No crazy body positions for me.”

“That’s right, you said you make house music, right? I’d love to hear some of your stuff. It’s a second passion of mine,” Kevin said.

An actual musician? Listening to my music?

I nearly declined on impulse. I thought my stuff was good, but I had no training at all. Kevin might listen to it and think it was the worst crap ever thrown together. My ego didn’t want to face reality if that was the case.

My mom’s voice came back to me.
We make our own luck, Christian.

If I didn’t show my music to others, how could I hope to get better and be discovered?

“You know, I have a couple tracks on my phone I could give you,” I said. “I’d love to get your notes on them or any thoughts to make it better.”

Sean leaned over as Kevin and I pulled our phones out. “Hey, can I take a look, too? I can give you feedback, if that’s what you’re looking for.”

“Really?” I barely knew these guys, and yet they were falling over themselves to help me out. “You’d do that?”

He shrugged. “Sure. We’ve had to critique and analyze music for years, so it’s natural at this point. Granted, we don’t get the chance to do it for EDM and house music often, but I think it would be kind of cool. Besides, I’m always looking for new stuff to listen to.”

“Do you work with any vocalists?” one girl asked. Tall and with flowing blonde hair, she looked like she had just stepped off the cover of
Vogue
.

“Ah, no,” I said. “I’d love to, since that would set my stuff apart, but I can’t sing well and I don’t know any singers I could ask. Mostly I just remix pop songs or tracks from the bigger names like Garrix and Guetta, or else do instrumental work.”

“I’m Liana. Why don’t you give me a copy of your stuff too? If I like it, then maybe I can come by sometime and we can work out vocals to an original track of yours. I like to dabble in songwriting now and then, and it would be a cool extra to have in my portfolio. And who knows, maybe you’ll make it big and take me along with you.” She winked.

“Hell, yeah!” I said. Original vocals were rare for someone unrecognized. Most DJs just remixed songs by others since it was easier than having to write lyrics and find someone talented enough to do them justice when they sang.

Soon enough, all the people in our little group had our phones out as I beamed them the files and gave out contact info. It must have looked strange to any of the others in the apartment.

“Got it,” Kevin said. “I’ll take a look tomorrow. Something tells me I’ll be impressed. Maybe Leah mentioned something at one point.”

Leah.
I knew that she could be the source of change in my life. No matter what else happened between us, I had to find her and thank her for giving me the chance to run into these music students. Suddenly I wasn’t alone in my passions.

I excused myself to go to the living room. Leah sat on the arm of the couch next to a guy with gelled hair and a model’s face. Actor-type.

One of the others sitting across the room was speaking. “Seriously, though, Leah, when you get rich and famous and go live in Los Angeles, you’ll have to take me with you. I’ll even cook your food and do your dishes and give you all the sexing you need.”

She laughed. “Brian, if you cook, aren’t they going to be your dishes?”

The guy beside her put his arm around her and pulled her into his lap, which made her laugh harder. He spoke to the other man. “Back off, Brian, I’ve got her. Besides, we’re going on a date tomorrow, aren’t we, Leah?”

Date?
My face went hot, then cold.
He has to be joking.

She straightened up to look down at him and slapped him in the shoulder. “David! You aren’t supposed to just go around telling everyone about that. Have you learned nothing through the years?”

She looked around at the room and everyone laughing and saw me by the doorway. Even after hearing that, I wanted to kiss the look off her face.

I turned around and found the front door, stopping only long enough to thank Kevin and his group of helpful musicians again, telling them that something had come up and I had to bail.

Out in the hallway, I couldn’t bring myself to leave right away. I stuck around for a couple minutes as though waiting for something.

Face it. Leah won’t knock the door down chasing you and begging you to come back to the party.

I dialed a number and brought the phone to my ear. “Derek? Sorry I’m late. I had something come up I had to deal with, but I’ll be there. It’s like you said, the crew is family, and I need to be with my family.”

Joseph leaned back in his chair and signaled for us to continue.

“Annie, you are the woman of my dreams. I want you to come away with me to France. We can dance under the stars and drink fine wine every day. Please tell me yes.” Richard finished the lines without stumbling this time, although the sincerity of his delivery needed work.

“Sebastien,” I said. “You know my heart yearns for you, but I am betrothed to another. How can I trust a man who would take another’s promised for himself? Do you think me an indecent woman?”

Joseph nodded, a subtle stamp of approval.

“Nay! Perish the thought, my beloved. I simply can’t control my body when I am near you. I breathe your scent as though it were the essence of life itself. How can I do anything else other than love you?”

I winced inside. His inflections were all wrong, and the emphasis was on the wrong parts to make it sound natural.
Did he even read the script before this?

“Okay, I’ve heard enough for now,” Joseph said. “It’s a long script, and we won’t get through it in one sitting here. Richard, I’m not expecting perfection on the first read-through, but at least get into it a little bit. Leah—very impressive. I’m looking forward to what you do with the role on stage. Good job, everyone, but I want you all to take a few good read-throughs of the script, especially the scenes your character is in. It was a little choppy tonight. Not something we can’t fix, but we can improve on that.”

Chair legs scraped against the tile floor as people stood up and stretched. We’d been in the seats for a good two hours, but it felt longer.

“I can’t believe we haven’t even finished the first act yet,” said the man to my left.

I hadn’t heard him speak yet—a lot of the characters hadn’t yet entered, so about half the people sitting at the table for the table read hadn’t read yet. He was handsome though—curly brown hair cut close to his head and big open eyes. At least a few years older than me.
Around the same age as Chris.

“It’s a long play,” I agreed. “It’ll be intense.”

“And you have the most lines out of anyone,” he said. “I don’t envy you. I’m John.”

“Leah.” We shook hands. “What role are you playing?”

“Oh, just a minor one. You probably didn’t even catch it while you flipped through the script. I have to say though, you are good. What other plays have you been in?”

I blushed. I’d worried about letting down my fellow actors with my inexperience, praise was the last thing I expected. “None. No professional ones, anyway, just stuff at school here and there.”

“You must have done something! Movies? Television?”

I shook my head. “Nothing like that. Never had the talent for it growing up, just been putting a lot of hard work into rehearsing and becoming better over the past couple years while at school.”

“I don’t believe it,” John said, resting his elbow on the table and placing his chin in his hand as he looked at me. “You’re pulling my leg aren’t you? As good an actress as you are, I wouldn’t even know.”

“Oh, that’s right. I’m a famous actress, and once I drop my acting face, you’ll recognize me and it’ll blow your mind.” I laughed. It was surprising how easily John could charm.

“I knew it!” he exclaimed. “Hiding in our midst was the incomparable Meryl Streep all along! How could we not realize?”

Most of the others had cleared out of the room by this point. A couple guys grabbing another cup of coffee were all that remained.

“What’s your take on Joseph?” I asked.

John stroked his chin, still in his hand. “Our most noble director? That’s tough to say. His reputation as a drama queen who implodes under pressure on opening day isn’t promising. They say he went to a shrink for that and is much better now.”

“Are you serious? He didn’t look like that at all!” John’s words shocked me. Joseph had seemed capable.

“Maybe he’s made peace with his demons,” John said. “Or maybe there’s no reason to freak out months away from opening, and we’ll see the truth when we get closer to crunch time. Either way, it should be interesting.”

The stragglers exited the room, leaving it to John and me.

“And what about the rest of the cast?” I asked. “I’ve never been in a professional production before, and it… well, I felt like people were much less prepared than I would have expected.”

It was an understatement. Worrying about my ability to fill the role well and do a good job to not let down my fellow actors had occupied my mind so that I hadn’t considered the reverse happening; me being let down by the others.

“Well, we aren’t exactly Broadway, here.” John gestured around the room. There was peeling wallpaper in the corner and dust darkened the old lamps on the walls. It didn’t look that bad, though. “We’re considered Off-Broadway because the classification depends on the size of the theater. Just because we have a lot of seats here doesn’t mean that there are a lot of
good
plays.”

“But…” I frowned. “The script—it’s phenomenal. If it was a true Broadway show, it would absolutely kill at the box office. It could be the next
Phantom of the Opera
!”

“A script does not a good play make,” he said. “Not without good actors, a good director, and good sets. And unfortunately, none of that comes together without great reputations underpinning everything.”

I had been so eager to take a professional role I had given little thought to the company I’d be working for.

I groaned.
Did I screw myself over by rushing into this?
I’d been so happy to get the role I hadn’t done proper research into what I was getting myself into—the company and the people backing the production.

“Are we doomed?” I asked. “This script is so complicated. It would take a very talented cast and crew to pull it off.”

John patted my arm. “Life is just a series of experiences. Good and bad are a matter of perspective and frame of reference. No matter what happens, it will be interesting.”

He grinned. It was the second time he’d used that phrase. Something told me John was a man who thrived on interesting experiences.

“Is that why you’re subjecting yourself to this potential train wreck?”

“Oh, I’m not part of the cast. But no one knows people’s faces yet, so it’s not like anyone would stop me from sitting at the table when there wasn’t a chance you were getting through that monster script.”

“Crew, then? Are you going to be rolling out all the set changes?”

His eyes danced.

“No, that’s not it. Do you even have anything at all to do with this play?”

He placed a hand on his heart. “I’m hurt! You think I would just come in off the street and infiltrate a random table read for my personal amusement?”

I made it clear from the look on my face that was exactly what I thought he was capable of. I hadn’t known John for long, but he was a scoundrel if I’d ever seen one.

“Fine. If you must know, yours truly wrote this heaving, awfully verbose, incredibly confusing pile of pages you call a script.”

“You
wrote
this?”

“Surprised? Can’t say I blame you. I’ve always had a reputation as a failure. It meant when my magnum opus went out to bid, none of the major companies even took a look at it.”

Hidden beneath the flippancy was something deeper, something he didn’t want me to see.

I looked him in the eyes. “I will do everything I can to make sure that this play is a success. For me, but for you, too. I promise you that.”

He waved away my vow. “Keep your promises, Leah. There’s only so much you can do.”

We’ll see about that.