Love Discovered in New York (The Washington Triplets) (19 page)

Staring at the lid of my beverage, I quietly questioned the information that was being laid out in front of me. “Were Mom and Dad separated?”

“Not that I know of, but like I said from the reactions I got, something was up between them,” Marisa noted.

Marisa and I both looked at Mikaela waiting for her response. The hesitation in her body language caused my eyes to widen slightly. I glanced at Marisa and her facial expression looked like what I assumed my expression looked like.

“Mikaela?” I prompted.

“Kinda in a way. They had separate lives, kept out of each other’s way for the most part. I think they fell out of love,” she looked down into her lap, swallowing visibly before looking back up. “I really think they stuck it out for us.”

My heart dropped.
So they stuck it out for us?
I thought incredulously.
So Mom stayed with a man who was cheating… What?

“Do you think Mom knew about Janet?” I whispered over the sounds of blenders and laughter surrounding us in the coffee shop.

“I'm not sure,” Marisa answered quietly, turning to look at Mikaela.

Again, the pause that proceeded Mikaela’s response made me nervous. I stared intently at her with wide eyes until she responded.

Mikaela looked away, trying to avoid the question. Looking between us, she finally replied, "I-I don't know for sure, yes, maybe. I don't know." Taking a purposeful breath, she continued, "I should have told her, I was going to but then..."

We all exchanged a knowing look.

Letting the information sink in, I wavered between being shocked at the situation, being sad for mom, and being pissed at Dad. Although I was still mad at him, I couldn’t help feeling a little relieved.

Even if Mom and Dad had an understanding and even if Dad told Mom he was dating, Mom died months ago and Dad is already planning to marry his mistress. That’s incredibly inappropriate,
I thought with notably less rage.
But I’m glad Dad isn’t the complete asshole that I thought he was.

We drank in silence for a minute.

“I just think it's disrespectful for Dad to propose to Janet minutes after Mom is buried,” I acknowledged, twisting my mouth to the side. I rapped my fingers against the table.

Marisa placed her hand over mine, stopping the motion of my fingers. "I know, but maybe we should just hear his side of it. What choice do we really have?"

“I agree,” Mikaela said. “We need to listen to Dad. I-I need to tell him that I knew more than he thought I did. Mya, it's time, we have to do this. It's time for us to be sisters, close sisters, who have a dad that's being the only kind of dad he knows how to be.”

Their words hit me harder than I thought it would and I didn’t respond.

I want to be close to my family again. I do. Especially since Mom is gone. I don’t want to lose anyone else in my life without them knowing how important they are to me. I love my sisters. I love my parents,
I reminded myself as I finished the sweet drink.

“Wow,” I breathed in response. “I don’t even know what to say to that.”

We sat in silence for a while, reflecting. The wedding was in hours. And even though part of me felt as if I should go, I still didn’t know if I would actually go.

I’ve heard from Dad and now I’ve heard from my sisters… but I don’t know if I will actually go to the wedding
, I admitted to myself.
I love the remaining members of my immediate family. But who’s standing up for Mom in this situation? Mom wasn’t happy, but she stayed for us. Dad wasn’t happy, but he kept a woman on the side. It just doesn’t seem fair.

Marisa, Mikaela and I talked for a little while longer, catching up on life. When we noticed the time, we quickly gathered our things and hugged. As we walked out of the coffee shop, I realized we were separating, again.

“Regardless of if I actually show up to the wedding or not, I will definitely meet you after,” I said as I backed away from them, heading in the opposite direction. “I love you both. Let’s talk more tonight.”

When I turned around, I let out a deep breath. The temperature had risen and I walked slower as a result. My mind was swirling in confusion as I tried to process the information that I had just received. Of everything, it hurt most to realize that the things I thought were judgments about me and my life were most likely motherly insight based on what she was going through in her life. Everything I thought I knew about my mom and dad’s relationship was just turned on its head. Everything I thought I knew about my mom and dad’s relationship with me was just turned on its head. Everything I thought I knew, I realized I had no clue.

Was I so caught up in feeling like the black sheep of the family that I didn’t even notice what was going on?
I wondered, walking through the door of the Waldorf Astoria.

I fretted about my confusion until I walked through the door of my hotel room. And then all rational thought left my brain.

Standing in front of the mirror, Colton wore a gray suit with a crisp white shirt. From the way the fitted suit fit his broad shoulders and muscular body, he didn’t just look good. He looked devastatingly handsome.

I let out a gasping breath as my eyes took him in. Unable to move from the doorway, I just stared at him, not speaking a word.

He licked his lips and gave me a sexy smirk, lifting his arms up at his sides.

“Hey, handsome. Have I told you how sexy you are?” I asked flirtatiously, letting the door slam shut behind me as I moved into the room.

Colton laughed, “It takes a suit for you to finally call me handsome? I’ll have to remember that.”

“You don’t have to wear a suit for me to tell you that,” I said, stopping a few feet in front of him.

“Yeah, yeah, yeah,” he teased. Pulling me into him, he wrapped his arms around me and kissed me sweetly. “So how was the meet up with your sisters?”

“It was…informative.”

“Did you decide if you want to go to the wedding?”

“Not yet.”

“Do you believe your dad?”

I took a minute to answer that question. I had been debating back and forth and that question remained at the forefront of my mind. And even though I knew what my gut told me, I still felt troubled.

“Yes,” I whispered. “But I still don’t think what he’s doing is right.”

Kissing the top of my head, Colton held me close. The gesture was so sweet that my eyes started to water. In that moment, I didn’t feel judgment. I didn’t feel disappointment. I didn’t feel anything but love and support. With my heart pounding in my chest, I rested my face on his chest and listened to his heartbeat. I felt a sense of calm knowing that I had the same effect on him as he did me.

After a few minutes of quietly rocking back and forth as if we were dancing with no music, I pulled away from him slightly.

Looking down at me with those beautiful eyes that were more brown than hazel, Colton softly asked, “What do you want to do? We can do whatever it is you want to do. It’s up to you.”

“Can I decide after we go to Music Box?” I asked, reminding him of the afternoon movie date he promised me we would go on to distract me from Dad’s wedding to Janet.

Grabbing my face, he kissed me and made me feel it throughout my body. “Yes. Let’s go.”

Leaving the hotel hand-in-hand, I couldn’t help but notice how easy things were with him.

Lord knows, it was hard as hell without him,
I thought as we made our way to Colton’s car.

On the way to Music Box, I told him about what happened at the coffee house with my sisters. Holding my hand the entire time, he listened to me. He knew exactly when to probe for more information and when to just let me talk and vent. All the while, he maneuvered the vehicle with one hand as we cruised down Lake Shore Drive.

After getting tickets and drinks, we got comfortable in the small art house theater. Resting my head on his shoulder, I tried to get wrapped up in the plot of the suspense film. But every character reminded me of someone in my family, so it was hard to get them out of my brain.

If I don’t go to the wedding, my relationship with my family will likely remain strained. And I don’t want that. I’ve come this far. I should just go to the wedding,
I reasoned.
If Mom knew about Janet and still stayed in the house with him, I can surely go to the wedding. But… Dad moved on too quickly and I don’t want to go to the wedding and give the impression that I’m okay with him cheating on Mom. Even if everyone else described it as falling out of love, I still look at it as a betrayal. Ugh! I guess it just boils down to what I think Mom would want me to do.

For the rest of the movie, the idea of falling out of love stuck with me. When we left, I still couldn’t shake the thought from my mind. The walk to the car was short, but quiet.

“Talk to me,” Colton demanded gently as soon as we were in the safety of his gray sports car. He turned the car on so that the air conditioning would cool us off, but he didn’t move out of the parking spot. Putting his hand on mine and gently caressing my skin with his thumb, he continued. “What’s on your mind?

I looked down at our hands before turning slightly to look him in his eyes. “Do you think people can just fall out of love?”

He nodded slowly as he said, “Yeah. But when it happens, it doesn’t happen all of a sudden. It’s gradual and over time. And it’s if two people aren’t trying to stay in love. What do you think?”

“I don’t have much personal experience to go by,” I admitted quietly.

“You’re trying to look at this from your dad’s point of view, aren’t you?”

I nodded and then looked out of the window again. I turned my hand over and intertwined our fingers. We were both quiet for a minute. “If they weren’t in love, they shouldn’t have stayed married. I firmly believe that,” I said forcefully. “And if he loves Janet, I don’t understand how he could stay married. But to only wait a few measly months after Mom’s death to marry the mistress? That’s harsh.”

“Yeah,” he agreed. “I see your point. The timing is definitely messed up.”

“That’s what I’m saying!”

“So you’re not upset with the marriage so much as you are the timing of it?”

“Exactly. Why the rush to get married now? Why now?” I questioned, balling my hand into a fist and bringing it down firmly on my knee. “I just don’t understand.”

“I know, baby. I know. But you said that Mikaela said she thought your mom knew. So maybe there’s more to the story than it appears.”

“Yeah, I guess.” I rubbed my fingers against my forehead and turned to look at him again. “I just keep going back and forth and I can’t decide if I should go. On one hand, if I don’t, I know things won’t get better between me and my sisters. On the other hand, there’s Mom and I don’t want to disrespect her memory.”

“That’s a hard decision to make.” Tucking hair behind my ear, he continued, “All I can really offer is that no one ever really knows what’s going on in a marriage except for the two people who are in it. That’s what Corrine said when our parents weren’t on board with her marriage anyway. She didn’t speak to them for a while and that was the risk my parents thought they were willing to take…until Corrine actually cut them out of her life for a while. And then they realized they couldn’t control other people or make them make the choices they would make.”

“That makes sense.” I closed my eyes and rested my head back on the headrest. “I don’t want to be estranged from my family.”

Colton squeezed my hand gently. “I know you don’t. Even the look you have when you talk about your dad now is different.”

“What?” My voice held a confusing mixture of relief and nervousness in its delivery.

How is he able to read me like this?
I thought, feeling a never-ending wealth of affection for this gorgeous man beside me.

He took a deep breath before continuing. “I just get the feeling that you believe your dad, but you feel guilty for not seeing your mom more before she died. And I know that that’s hard for you. You have this tough girl thing going on, but I see you, Mya.”

I didn’t respond. I just stared at him blankly as my heart beat rapidly.

“You said that Marisa said they didn’t seem happy and they seemed to be living separate lives. You said that Mikaela said your mom kinda knew about Janet. And you said your mom’s emails about love were like a warning to not end up in a relationship like hers. I know this is eating at you and I will support you in whatever you decide. I just don’t want you to regret anything.”

I shook my head as the facts were laid out before me. “I hate this,” I whispered.

“I know.” He pulled me toward him and hugged me over the middle console. He kissed my face and hair, tenderly spreading warmth all throughout my body.

Nuzzling into his neck, I sighed. “I feel horrible,” I said with a tremble in my voice. “If Dad had Janet, who did Mom have?”

“That’s something you’d have to ask your dad. And he may not even know.”

“Love sucks,” I grumbled, swallowing around the lump in my throat.

“It can,” he agreed with a nod. “But not with the right person.”

Thinking about my mother’s emails about love, she clearly didn’t think love sucked. I pushed out of his embrace so I could see his face. “So I guess Dad thinks Janet is the right person.”

Colton just looked at me with a cute, blank expression and I gave him a small smile.

“I made my decision.”

“Cool. What do you want to do?”

“I’m not going to go to the wedding. I’ll just go to the reception. The more I struggle over it, the more I realize I shouldn’t be at the actual wedding ceremony. I can’t pretend to be happy about this, you know? Do I think Mom and Dad’s marriage was over? Seems like it. Do I think Dad was sincere in what he told me over the phone? I guess. But do I think this wedding is disrespectful to my mother? Absolutely. But if Dad is in love with Janet, I…”

Stroking my hair, he gazed at me. His eyes dropped down to my lips and then returned. “You what?” He prompted softly.

I paused and we just stared at each other. Licking my lips, I admitted, “I guess I get it. I wouldn’t want to be away from the person I’m in love with.” After a shaky breath, I added, “I do know how that feels… I was miserable without you.”