Baby Blues and Wedding Shoes (33 page)

“We did, but it wasn’t the same this
year.”

“I know what you mean.” Helen had
arrived at lunchtime the day before, and was thrilled that Simon
was already there. Hearing all about his adventures in Abu Dhabi
was amazing, and he hadn’t seen her since she got pregnant so he
kept laughing that his little sister wasn’t so little any more. She
had kept looking round for her ally, but he was too far away to
come to her rescue, and it made her feel lost. Talking now on the
phone, under the duvet in her room, she felt like a giddy teenager
again. It was a nice feeling.

Helen could hear the background noise
getting louder down the phone, as Marcio had to raise his voice to
speak. “The kids have been allowed downstairs, chaos is about to
commence. I’d better go. I miss you. I love you.” Before she could
respond, he had hung up the phone.

Hitting cancel on her own phone, Helen
lay snug under the duvet, not wanting to break the spell. “I love
you too,” she murmured into the silence.

Hearing movement below, Helen threw off
the duvet and pulled on some maternity jeans. She had bought a big
red jumper for Christmas day, which clashed horribly with her hair.
She looked like a giant robin, but it made her feel festive. Adding
a Father Christmas hat, complete with giant white pompom, she
headed out the door and down to join her family.

Christmas day was always the same in the
farmhouse. Breakfast was early, and consisted of pancakes and
bacon, and porridge if the weather was very cold. Then the family
would wrap up in as many woollies as they could find and head down
to the beach.

This morning the sky was clear, the sun
shining on the overnight frost making it look almost like snow on
the ground. They were the first family down on the beach, although
they wouldn’t be alone for long. Many of the families in their
village had the same tradition, and it was often when they caught
up with their neighbours and wished them season’s greetings.

It felt great to be outside, after the
long train ride of the previous day. With two hot-water
bottle-babies keeping her warm, Helen barely felt the bitter wind
that came in off the sea, tufting the surface of the waves into
mini snowdrifts. Her cheeks felt chaffed and red.
Probably
adding nicely to my robin redbreast impression,
she thought.
She felt alive and full of hope for the future.

In her pocket her phone vibrated,
telling her a text message had arrived. Thinking it would be from
Marcio, she pulled off her gloves and fished out her phone. She
didn’t recognise the number. Intrigued, she unlocked the phone and
read the message.

Happy Christmas Helen. I hope you and
our babies are well. Give me a call. Daniel.

Her heart thumped painfully in her ears
and her hands shook with adrenalin.

How dare he!

Helen hadn’t heard anything from Daniel
since the night she left his apartment. There hadn’t been so much
as a note in the boxes of belongings that had been sent on to Devon
months ago. In all that time, he hadn’t so much as forward on her
mail.

It was as if I ceased to exist
.
And now he sends a message as if I only saw him yesterday. As if
he hadn’t wanted to kill our babies.

Babies. So he knew she was expecting
twins.

Sara must have told him, the
cow
.

Although why it mattered whether he
knew she was carrying one, two or a dozen babies, she wasn’t sure.
They were not
his
babies. He had given up that right seven
months ago.

“Sweetheart, are you okay?”

Helen looked up at her mother’s voice
and realised she was standing stationary twenty yards behind the
rest of the family. She tried to call back to her mum, but no words
would come. Terrible thoughts were flapping at the edges of her
mind.

When Helen didn’t respond Maggie
hurried back towards her daughter. “Are the babies okay? Do you
need to sit down?”

Helen saw the concern in her mother’s
face and forced herself to speak. “I’m fine, Mum, fine.”

“You don’t look fine, poppet, you look
like you’ve seen a ghost.”

“I guess I have.”

“What do you mean? You’re scaring
me.”

Unable to explain, Helen mutely handed
her phone to her mother. Maggie peered at the small screen, her
eyes scrunched against the sun so she could read the words.

“The bastard! What’s his game?”

Once more Helen was startled out of her
misery by shock at her mother’s language. She laughed weakly

“Thank you, I needed that. Bastard
indeed.” She looked about her, surprised to see the sun still
shining, the day still beautiful. The dark clouds that had
descended were all in her mind, but no less powerful for all
that.

“What are you going to do? I hope you
don’t intend to respond to him?”

“I don’t know, to be honest. Knowing
Daniel, he has some ulterior motive. If I don’t respond, he’ll only
persist. I need to find out what he’s plotting.”

“I can’t believe he sent that message
today. Christmas is a time of joy and family, things he doesn’t
seem to know much about. Does he know about Marcio?”

Helen thought about her meeting with
Sara. If Daniel knew about the twins, he knew about Marcio. But he
wouldn’t give him a second thought. Nothing and no-one got between
Daniel and his end game.

“I guess,” she shrugged.

Marcio. What am I going to say to
him?
They hadn’t talked about it, but she had always got the
impression that Marcio thought Daniel wasn’t completely out of her
life. She thought Marcio was putting his own feelings of honour and
nobility onto Daniel, when the latter had no concept of the
notions. To Marcio a man would not abandon children he had
fathered, whatever the circumstances. It turned out maybe Marcio
was right.

“Perhaps Daniel has decided to do the
right thing,” her mum unconsciously voiced her own thoughts.
Maggie’s words contained as much doubt as Helen’s mind.
Mum
obviously doesn’t think Daniel capable of doing the right thing
either.

“It’s possible, I guess. Maybe his
fiancée
has given him a conscience. He doesn’t have one of
his own.”

“I can’t imagine any fiancée
encouraging him to get in touch with his previous one, or to claim
parental rights over children that aren’t hers.”

Parental rights. The dark wings began
clambering again. Helen turned to her mother, stricken. “You don’t
think he’s going to try for custody of the children? Or visiting
rights or whatever? He can’t!” She felt a sob form in her throat.
She knew Daniel; she knew what he was capable of.

“Darling, they’re not going to hand two
tiny babies over to a man who disowned them from the get-go.
They’ll need you for food if nothing else, and there is no reason
to take them from you. You and Marcio, you’ll give those babies
everything they need and more. What can Daniel offer them that you
can’t?”

“Money.”

“There’s more to life than money,
Helen.” Her mother’s voice was firm.

“Will courts and judges see it like
that?” Helen began looking wildly around the beach, as if searching
for the social workers who were going to wrench her children from
her. She needed Marcio here, now.

Maggie took her daughter by the
shoulders and forced her to focus. “Calm down. Breathe. You’ll harm
yourself and the babies if you allow yourself to get upset. You
need to find what Daniel wants, and talk to Marcio. The babies
aren’t even due for another six weeks. Relax, please darling, if
you can.” She dropped her hands from Helen’s shoulders and linked
her arm through hers. She gently tugged her forward, hoping that if
she caught up with her father and brother, between them they could
distract her thoughts until she was calmer.

The movement settled Helen’s scattered
thoughts, allowing her to process the ideas that were now tearing
through her previously tranquil mind.

Mum’s right, he can hardly snatch
the children from my womb. There is plenty of time to find out what
he’s after and head him off
. She tried to put the text message
out of her head, to concentrate on her family and enjoy the time
with them. She longed to be able to talk it all through with
Marcio. He would know what to do.

Chapter
Four

She was sat by the fire with one of the
cats curled up on her knees when the phone rang. Her first thought
was that it was Daniel, and she shivered, despite the flames
flickering only three feet away. Her mum went to answer it and came
back with the handset. Her demeanour reassured Helen that it was
Marcio on the phone, and she took the handset willingly.

“How has your day been, gorgeous
one?”

Helen felt her face relax at the sound
of Marcio’s voice. He sounded happy and she didn’t know whether to
spoil his day by telling him about the text message from Daniel. On
the other hand, if she concealed it from him he might jump to all
the wrong conclusions if he found out later.

“It’s been mostly great.” She tried to
keep her voice light.

“What’s happened?” Marcio was instantly
alert, his voice sharp. Helen once more marvelled at how intuitive
he was.

“I had a text from Daniel this morning.
Asking how the babies and I were.”

There was silence. Helen’s stomach
twisted as she waited for his response. Eventually Marcio simply
said, “Oh.”

Her heart dropped, but she tried to
keep the conversation moving. “Oh indeed. Lord knows what he’s
after. I got into a panic that he wants to take the babies away,
but Mum has spent the day convincing me I’m nuts.”

“Of course you are,” Marcio said, a
little too quickly. From what he knew of Daniel, nothing would
surprise him. Daniel might have taken it into his head that he
wanted an heir to inherit his business, or simply wanted control of
something he considered his. Unlike Maggie, Marcio felt that Helen
was right to be suspicious of Daniel’s motives. He didn’t want to
cause her pain, so he concealed his fear as best he could. It
surprised him how strongly he felt about Daniel wanting to take the
children.
My children.

“Whatever he’s after, we’ll handle him.
So, what did Father Christmas bring you?” His voice was light, but
Helen wasn’t fooled. She understood his intention and loved him for
it. She told him all the gifts her family had bought for her and
the twins, and listened while he did the same. They had agreed to
swap their own presents when he came down to Devon in a couple of
days.

“I do have one gift for you now
though,” he said, his voice betraying a little-boy excitement. She
could picture his face, eyes gleaming, dimples peeping through.

“Ooh, what is it,” she asked in her
best girly voice. “Will I like it?”

“I hope so!”

“Where is it?” She looked around, as if
someone was about to pop out and produce a neatly-wrapped gift.

“It’s not the kind of thing you can
wrap.”

“Really?” she responded in a suggestive
voice, glad her family had discretely left the room to give her
some privacy.

“Now, now, you naughty girl, get your
mind out the gutter!” He laughed.

“Go on, put me out my misery!”

“I sold my book.” He grinned and held
the phone away from his ear while she screamed.

“Oh my god, that’s amazing! When, who,
when did you find out? Tell me, tell me!”

“I found out a couple of weeks
ago.”

“And you didn’t tell me? How did you
keep that a secret?”

“With difficulty! But I wanted to
understand all the terms and so on, and then I had the idea of
waiting a couple more days, so I could tell you today, as a little
gift. It’s good money, you see. Enough that we can get a place
together. If you would like that?” His voice tailed off, suddenly
hesitant. They had talked about moving in together, but they
couldn’t afford anywhere big enough in London, even if they sold
Helen’s flat. Neither of them relished the idea of moving to the
suburbs. Marcio wasn’t sure how Helen would take to the idea of him
funding the move, particularly not after Daniel. He knew she didn’t
want to be dependent on a man again. He was suddenly worried that a
crackly phone line was not the ideal time to have this
discussion.

Helen took a few moments to analyse her
reaction to his news, and his proposal. Had she known it, Marcio
had exactly guessed her thoughts – she wanted to live with him, but
didn’t like the idea of being beholden to him.

Before she could speak, he added, “Of
course, you’ll have to pay rent, until you sell one of your photos
for a fortune!”

She laughed, relieved that he
understood her reluctance. “In which case, I get to choose which
bedroom is mine!”

“Oh,” he said, in a little voice, “I
sort of hoped you might sleep in my bed.”

“Really, what kind of landlord are you,
to sleep with your tenants?” Her prim voice collapsed into giggles
as the thought sunk in that they would be able to live together as
a proper family. It really was the most amazing Christmas gift.

“It’s fantastic news, Marcio, and I
think getting a place together will be amazing, as long as you
understand we’ll have both names on the mortgage. I’ll pay my own
way somehow.”

“I know you will. You’ll be looking
after our babies; that will be payment enough.”

Our babies
. Usually the phrase
made her smile, but this time it echoed the words of Daniel’s text.
The poor twins had gone from having no father to having two. With
Helen caught in the middle.

Chapter
Five

Helen was just tucking into a Boxing Day
brunch of bacon and turkey sandwiches when someone knocked at the
door. Looking up, expecting to see one of the neighbours who
periodically popped round to wish the family season’s greetings,
she suddenly leapt up and ran as quickly as she was able around the
table. She threw herself into Marcio’s arms, nearly knocking him
flat under the unexpected weight of her and the twins.