Authors: A.J. Betts
Zac and Mia (20 page)
‘They want you to try again.’
‘They’re not tough enough.’
‘They are.’
‘Are you?’
Shit, he’s got me. I wipe my face quickly, then show him a flexed bicep, made strong by months on crutches. ‘What do you think?’
‘That is pretty tough.’
I balance myself against Zac’s shoulders. I see how tired he is. I see how easy it would be to slip away. But I’m not going to let him, not after everything he’s done for me. Maybe I’m just being selfish for wanting him around. Is that so wrong?
‘I’m like The Hulk,’ I tell him.
‘You turn green?’
‘I’m tough,’ I promise. ‘Are you tough enough to piggyback me to Bec’s house?’
‘Why?’
‘You can’t expect me to hop all that way.’
Zac swears and shakes his head. His eyes are grey. He’s tired of me—tired of everything—but I grip him tight.
He says, ‘Do I have a choice?’
I shake my head back at him.
Zac turns and squats low for me. I hook my arms around his neck and make another wish.
ZAC
From this side of the wall, I hear the newbie arrive. Nina goes through the instructions in her cheerful, air-hostess way, as if this flight will go smoothly.
It won’t.
There’ll be turbulence. Unexpected stopovers. Bad food. Loss of oxygen and moments of sheer panic.
But if the newbie’s lucky, he won’t endure it alone.
It sounds like a man in his fifties. I hear his questions. Later, there’s the rattle of toiletries in the bedside drawer. He showers. Flicks through the TV channels.
I want to tell him not to order the chicken schnitzel on a Tuesday. That
Seinfeld
is the only show to watch while nauseous.
Mum is in the pink chair beside me with a magazine. ‘What’s a nine-letter word for a precious stone?’
‘Turquoise,’ Mia shouts, as if it’s a competition.
Which it kind of is.
They’re supposed to take it in turns, these two, like fly-in, fly-out workers. Mum’s here for one week, then Mia the next. They don’t have to—I’m eighteen, for god’s sake.
But sometimes their visits overlap. Mia arrives early and Mum’s not so good at leaving.
‘Go say hi to the newbie,’ I tell Mum, and she puts down her pen.
‘Now?’
‘Yeah.’
‘I could use a tea …’
When Nina comes to check on my IV lines, she ends up looking over Mia’s shoulder, reading whatever chapter she’s up to. In the hours I’m sleeping, Mia makes notes from her
Introduction to Nursing
textbook. After getting into uni through special entry, she knows there’ll be a tough ride ahead. Nina helps her sometimes, forgetting me altogether.
Tomorrow I’ll be made new. I don’t know who I’ll be this time—a baby born in Bundaberg? Belgium? Brazil?—or even if the marrow will take graft and prosper. I’ll need to get all my vaccinations done again. Around the world, over 400,000 babies will be born tomorrow. Roughly five every second. There’ll be all kinds of babies starting life from scratch, and then there’ll be me.
At night, we watch the landing of Curiosity. From NASA’s spacecraft, a robot vehicle the size of a small SUV is finally wheeling its way across the surface of
Mars. Around Earth, scientists are cheering. Already they’re analysing data and recording the numbers of molecules, gases, humidity, minerals. They’re probing, scraping, looking for life.
It gives me hope, in a way. If a robot can navigate its way 560 million kilometres through our solar system, then scientists can find a cure for something as boring as my white blood cells. They’re closing in.
I don’t turn on the iPad at night because Mia’s beside me, sleeping in the pink chair. Every time I feel I’m slipping off the edge of the Earth, she catches me. She has good hands. Her leg is good too, even better than the fibreglass one she’d showed me that night. Her new one has a flex-foot and a silicone outer that looks like real flesh. She can run now, if she chooses to. Jump and dance if she wants. She can drive with it too.
Because why would I waste a Make-A-Wish grant on a trip to Disneyland? There are some wishes that money can buy, and then there’s this: Mia without pain, walking in symmetry with a top-of-the-range, custom-made leg.
What wouldn’t I do to keep the smile on her face? To hear that laugh, to have her fight with me, not against me. When we’re together, there’s no falling off, falling out, or falling down. I know there are no guarantees, but right now there’s Mia, ten out of ten, more beautiful and surprising than ever.
And I am the luckiest.
I’d like to acknowledge the students I’ve had the privilege of working with on ward 3B over the past eight years. This novel is fiction, but it is inspired by you: your humour, courage, love and beauty. A special mention to Tayla Hancock, whose belief in this story was with me at the beginning, and helped carry it through to the end. Thank you to her mother, Ros, for encouraging me to persevere.
I am grateful to friends who generously read early drafts: Ryan O’Neill (short story marvel and master of metaphor), Ruth Morgan (authority in youth, romance and reason), Meg McKinlay (children’s author and advocate for rhythm and melody) and Mum (tireless cheerleader). Suzanne Momber provided much enthusiasm and medical expertise, and kindly allowed me to exercise ‘creative licence’ when I needed to.
I’d like to thank Wendy Binks and her family for welcoming me into their homes and letting me loose in their petting farm, the Pentland Animal Farm, in Denmark. The experience was wonderful, and fed directly into the novel. Also, thank you to my teen neighbours, Jean and Will Morgan, for engaging in passionate debates about singers, video games, and vocab—you guys are hilarious, and priceless. Thanks to Ross and Wendy Morgan, who have witnessed the highs and lows of writing this novel. As always, you’ve been a rock.
Part of this novel was written in Adelaide in 2011, during a May Gibbs Creative Residential Fellowship. I appreciate the opportunity and heartfelt support given by the May Gibbs Literature Trust, and members of the Adelaide writing community.
Of course, this novel wouldn’t be here without the incomparable Text. I am hugely grateful for the commitment and passion of the entire Text team. Special thanks go to Emily Booth, Chong, Imogen Stubbs, and my talented editors, Ali Arnold and Davina Bell. Thank you for believing in this book, and in me.
A.J. BETTS
is a high school English teacher from Australia and spent eight years working in a hospital setting. Her previous novels include
ShutterSpeed
and
Wavelength
. She lives in Perth. WWW.AJBETTS.COM.
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Zac & Mia
Copyright © 2013 by A. J. Betts.
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EPUB Edition FEBRUARY 2014 ISBN 9781443432672
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Originally published in Australia by The Text Publishing Co Australia: 2013
First published in Canada by HarperCollins Publishers Ltd in this original trade paperback edition: 2014
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