You got to Me (Love on Tour #3) (13 page)

Sam studied Stacey for a long time.

“Come on, I’m so over that guy. Tell me.”

“Yes. He was making a booty call while you were at the grocery store. I came out of the bedroom and caught him in the middle of it.”

“And you punched him, just like that?”

“No. First, I tried to talk to him. I told him he had to come clean. Then he said something that pissed me off. Then I punched him. And that’s all you’re getting out of me.”

“Well done, brother,” Sean said.

I liked this family.

16

Stacey sat down next to me on a metal folding chair. “I’ve been thinking, Lisa. We should get to know each other better. After all, we’re going to be kickass aunts.”

“Agreed,” I said.

We were backstage. Sean was going on in about 15 minutes. And for the moment, we were alone.

“So how’s the tour been so far?”

“It’s been a wild ride.”

“Yeah, that article shit sure put a damper in the fun, huh?”

“It was pretty bad.”

“I can’t tell you how pissed off I was.”

“I know exactly how you feel.”

She turned to me. “Yeah, I guess you do. Sam really took one for the team, though.”

“Yeah, he was a big baby about the needle. I held his hand.”

“Oh right, the needle. That’s not what I meant, though.”

“What did you mean?”

“His name’s in that article, well sort of. Anyway, Sam doesn’t like the spotlight.”

“No?”

“No. I mean it’s always been a bit of a burden to him. Sean – and me to some degree – we are in it. You may not believe this, but when Sean’s not around, people actually ask me for my autograph sometimes. They recognize me from the plays I’m in.”

“I believe that.”

“Anyway, when Sam visits me or Sean he just prefers to stay in most of the time, because he doesn’t like the attention.”

This kind of surprised me. “But he still visits?”

“Oh yeah. We might be spread across the country, but the three of us are very close. I’m crazy about my brothers. But don’t tell Sam I said that.”

I laughed. “Well, pretty soon they’ll be in the same place.”

“Yeah. I’m kind of jealous. Maybe I’ll try to break into Hollywood or something so I can live out there, too. Of course, I would be a complete pain in the ass for them.” She grinned. “I’m the wild child in our house.”

“Sam seems like he could give you some competition.”

“Sam? No way. You know what my dad used to say? If Sean is the rock in our family, then Sam is the brain.”

“What does he mean by that?”

“Well, you know, Sam’s super smart. Sean watches out for everybody in one way, but Sam does it, too, just in his own way. The DNA test thing is a perfect example. Sean’s response was to protect little Henry by being a big, stubborn roadblock. But Sam protected Henry by using his noggin.”

“Hmmm. I thought everyone in your family thought Sam was a fuck-up?”

She laughed. “No, not really. I guess my parents kinda do. He just does his own thing, always has. So he doesn’t do what they want him to do and it irritates them to no end. But Sean and I know Sam’s one smart little fucker.”

Stacey’s potty mouth was, for some reason, absolutely hysterical to me.

“Sam hit on you yet?”

“What?”

“Oh, Lisa. He’s had a thing for you since the wedding.”

“You knew, too. Jesus, why didn’t anyone think to tell me?”

Stacey shrugged. “I take it he’s been giving you a hard time.”

I tried not to picture the pun that was forming in my head. “Yeah.”

“Yeah, Sam is persistent.”

“That’s was the word Sean used as well.”

Stacey laughed. “Good luck with that.”

****

“So what did happen with Ken?” Sam asked, as he traced a circle around my bellybutton with his finger.

“What brought that up?”

“We were talking about it this morning on the bus, remember?”

“Hmmm.”

I reached up and stroked his chin with my fingers. He hadn’t had time to shave this morning because we left Cleveland so early, and we’d had a very long day. His chin was covered in a thick coating of short hair.

“You want me to shave?”

“It’s too late now. I already have beard burn.”

He reached down and rubbed my thigh. “Sorry about that, sweetie.”

I wasn’t.

“So, Ken? Are you going to tell me what really happened?”

“You were right. I dragged him off to the loading dock to make out. It was my idea,” I admitted.

“And? What happened? Did he get pushy?”

“He stuck his hand down my pants.”

Sam’s eyes narrowed and his mouth hardened.

“Hey, you’ve stuck
your
hand down my pants.”

“I had permission.”

“Well he didn’t. I told him to stop. And he did. But a couple minutes later he did it again. I was just giving him a piece of my mind when Hank showed up.”

“Did Hank kick his ass?”

“No. I wouldn’t have let him. But Ken sure took off in a hurry.”

“I bet he did. I wish I’d been the one that showed up.”

I rolled over onto my side and snuggled up against his glorious naked body. “What would you have done? Beat him up?”

“Maybe.”

“Like you beat up your sister’s boyfriend?”

“Huh,” was all he said.

“What’s that story, anyway?”

He looked at me for a long moment. “Okay, I’ll tell you.” He propped himself up on one elbow and looked down at me. His hand kept up a steady, smooth rubbing on my hip. I really liked it. “When Stacy was in high school, she was raped.”

“Oh my God!”

“Yeah, it was bad. Dude went to jail, it was in the papers, the whole bit. Sean came home from college for a semester. That’s why he was playing that show I saw when I was 14. Anyway, my mom shipped the whole family off to counseling. Everyone had a shrink, Stacey had, like, a team of shrinks.”

“Even Sean?”

“Yeah, hard to believe, I know. They don’t get much more stable than Sean. But he had to go, too, at least while he was at home. And the shrink told him that he had a very specific anger management problem. His anger was uncontrollable when he was trying to protect someone he loved.”

“Doesn’t sound so bad.”

Sam shrugged. “It’s really not. And it’s not like he could change that. Anyway, he only had to go for like a month, then he went back to school and got out of it. I didn’t. My shrink dropped all kinds of insight on me. He said that because this happened when I was just starting to notice girls, it affected my view on relationships.”

I thought about the way Sam had asked me to say ‘yes’ in the stairwell. At the time I thought it was sweet and sexy. Now I understood why he’d done it, and it was even sweeter.

“He also said that I had a ‘Sean problem.’ That’s what he always called it, ‘a Sean problem.’” Sam chuckled. “I told Sean about it years later. You should have seen the look on this face.”

“So what was the ‘Sean problem?’”

“I idolized my brother, which was true, hell, it still is. I mean when you know Sean and then you watch him walk out on stage, it’s hard not to. Anyway, according to the shrink, it was a burden on me because I wanted to be my own man, and I had some sort of hidden fear that I would turn into a clone of Sean. I think it’s bullshit now. But I was young and impressionable back then. So, all the pieces of me that were like Sean – the music, the urge to protect the people I care about, the shyness – I put it all aside. I made this effort to be different from Sean. And he was away during that time, so maybe it made it easier. But it was stupid. So what? Sean and I have some traits in common. That didn’t put me in my brother’s shadow. I decided it was dumb. I picked the guitar back up. I spent more time with my brother, and just let the whole thing go.”

I was idolizing Sam right then. His level of self-awareness was mind-blowing. I never wanted to look at myself that closely. I was too afraid of what I’d find.

Sam kissed my shoulder. “But, I never did go back to being shy and quiet. And I kept my sunny perspective. Stacey was a little wild in her early twenties, okay, a lot wild. She partied and went through a lot of boyfriends. She also flirted with every bad boy she could find, and some of them were
really
bad. Sean and my dad nearly lost their minds over it. But I stayed calm about the whole thing. She was going to live her life. My job was not to protect her from every loser she wanted to bang, but to be there to support her when she got hurt.”

“For years, I was cool with Stacey’s stupid boyfriends. And it was a good thing, too, because she went through them like Kleenex. Sean was having regular meltdowns about it. But not me. Then I meet this Hal guy last year. I come out of the bedroom and he’s on the phone with a chick, talking about how he’s going to sneak off later and go fuck her. I confronted him. I told him that Stacey deserved better. And he says to me, ‘You think Stacey isn’t getting it on the side, too? That girl’s legs are so wide open that–’”

“That what?”

“I don’t know what he was going to say. He didn’t get to finish because I punched him in the face. Anyway, that shrink would have said that I’d pulled a very Sean-like move just then. But I don’t think so. I think I let Sam be Sam in that moment.”

My mind was a whirlwind. We’d started by talking about my make-out session with Ken, and suddenly, I felt like I knew Sam so much better. But I didn’t want to know Sam better. I wanted to have sex with him – yummy, meaningless sex. It was hard to focus on that after the conversation we’d just had. But I had to.

“Back to Ken,” I said.

“Yeah, Ken,” he scowled. “So you didn’t really like him, did you?”

I shrugged. “He was alright. But, you’re a much better kisser.”

“Yeah? You like the way I kiss?”

“Absolutely.”

He kissed me for a long time. Then he pulled back and looked at me. “Is that why you had sex with me in the stairwell? Because I’m a good kisser?”

“Maybe.”

“I’ll keep that in mind,” he whispered.

****

“You need to open up and tell me what’s going on,” Dani said.

“I told you all kinds of stuff. I told you about hanging out with Stacey, and that Sean hated her new boyfriend. I told you about Philly and the awesome food. We’re headed to Charlotte tomorrow and I’m really looking forward to it. I’ve never been there.”

“And you haven’t mentioned Sam once.”

“So?”

“So, up until Chicago you mentioned him every time we talked. Then you had crazy staircase sex and now mum’s the word. What’s going on?”

I sighed. Dani was the one person in the whole world I couldn’t lie to.

“You slept with him again, didn’t you?”

“Yes.”

“I knew it!”

“But we’re keeping it a secret. Sam is pretty sure Sean will be pissed.”

“I’m pretty sure he’s right.”

“Why would he be pissed?”

“Because Sean doesn’t approve of casual hook-ups.”

“He didn’t seem to mind them before you came along.” I thought about Shanna, but didn’t bring her up.

“Not for everybody, just for the people under his little Sean umbrella. And Lisa, you are firmly standing under it.”

“What about Sam?”

“Oh he’s in the damn middle. Lisa, Sam is a very sensitive guy.”

I had figured that out for myself. I both liked and hated it.

“He’s had his heart broken a dozen times,” Dani said. “So unless you guys get serious, you should just keep Sean out of the loop.”

“You’re the one that said I should have more sex with him.”

“I know. And if Sean ever finds out, I’m going to pay for it. How are Bell and Henry doing?”

“Good. Not a single fight. They’re pretty blissed out, actually. Bell’s had to scare off a bunch of girls. But she didn’t seem to mind. In fact, I think she kinda likes it.”

“Yeah, she’s tough. Tougher than me. It still bugs me every time. Speaking of which, you’re in Baltimore right now, aren’t you?”

“Yeah.”

“Where are you?”

“In Sean’s green room.”

“Where’s Sean?”

“He took off somewhere to work on a new song with Lyle. Why?”

“Well, you know that Baltimore is where everything went badly for us a few years ago.”

“Yeah, because of that damn Victoria Dee.”

“Well apparently, she’s in town again.”

“What?”

“And Sean and I are pretty sure she’s responsible for the magazine article. So the last thing he needs is to see her.”

“But Mike’s got it covered, right?”

“I’m sure he does. But she’s slippery, and if Sean does see her he’s going to be a mess. I need you to calm him down. Henry and Mike can’t do that when he gets really angry.”

“Okay. Calm him down and get you on the phone right away.”

“He won’t talk to me if he’s in a state, especially if I’m not there in person. You’ll have to get him somewhat chilled out first. Get Sam to help. Sam is very soothing.”

“Yes he is,” I mumbled.

Dani laughed. “Oh God. What a crazy situation we’re in.”

“Tell me about it.”

“So, you’ll go find Sean and make sure everything’s okay?”