Winning Appeal (10 page)

“There you go. It could be totally unrelated. Maybe she had a boyfriend in the building and they had a fight and he killed her… in front of your door,” I said, not very convincingly. “What is it you want us to do?”

“Anything,” Caitlin said, looking desperate and uneasy.

“How did she get by the doorman?” Beth asked.

“I don’t know. I guess the police will find out.”

“You can stay with me. I have a futon you can sleep on,” Beth said matter-of-factly and I almost got whiplash turning to face her.

“What? No, she can’t! Somebody is following her. They may have left a dead body in front of her door.”

“You said that might be a coincidence and totally unrelated,” she pointed out.

“I don’t want to take that chance,” I said through clenched teeth.

“You’re not taking it; I am.”

“You’re my girlfriend!”

“You and Mike are going out? Congratulations!” Caitlin perked up.

“I live in a secure building,” Beth said, ignoring her.

“So does she!” I reminded her.

“Well, do you want to stay
with
us?” I have to admit that for about a millisecond… Hey, I’m a guy!

“You two are into that?” Caitlin cut in. She paused and seemed to consider it. “You know, I might be up for it.” Beth and I both gave her a death glare at the same time, and then continued ignoring her.

“Beth, for now just let it be. We can talk to the building owner and make sure he understands that security needs to be tightened.”

“Isn’t there anything else we can do? I just don’t want to see anyone else get hurt.” The look she gave me made me want to find a way to make her happy. Fuck, I was a goner. I would be BBQing with the other marrieds soon.

“Maybe we can poke around online… from the safety of our office, and try to find out more about this reporter. Other than that, I’m not sure what we can do… unless Gerard invites us into his study where you happen to see the painting,” I added without thinking.

“Wait, if he invited us in… the mystery weekend,” Beth said looking excited. Nice job Mark. I doodled a picture of a big mouth on my pad.

Beth

6:00 PM

Cam opened the door and invited us in. When we got to the living room, all conversation immediately ceased and everyone turned to look at us in unison. Even Bruno, who looked like he was thinking, “tramp.”

“F. Scott and Zelda have arrived,” Cam announced with a smile.

“Nice tree. Well lit,” Braden said,
not
smiling.

“You, know Mark, standing under a tree filled with lights kind of defeats the purpose of copping a feel in the dark,” Adam added.

“Oh shit,” Mark said, looking pained. Paparazzi. I sighed.

“It was a beautiful picture,” Lily said, quickly coning over to stand next to me and throwing a threatening glance at her husband.

“It was very romantic, honey,” Jess added. “The two of you really could have been F. Scott and Zelda Fitzgerald. Except that you weren’t drunk. Or crazy.”

“What’s the big deal anyway?” Gabrielle asked, dismissively. “Braden and I had sex during your family’s fundraiser last year.”

“Gabrielle!” Braden said through gritted teeth.

“We all knew what you were doing, Braden,” Cam said. “Who sneaks off to a pool house during a formal dinner just to hang out?”

“At least we were inside a building,” he answered defensively.

“We were just kissing! We’re single adults, who have known each other for years, and we’re dating. Deal with it,” I demanded irritably.

“She’s right!” Jess said, coming over to join Lily and putting her arm around me. “And for the record, honey, the two of you make an adorable couple.”

“I think you make a nice couple too,” Cam added. Braden and Adam both turned to look at him. “Just sayin’.”

“I’m thrilled that you’re dating,” Braden said, “but you
still
can’t be all over each other in public at a fundraiser.”

“Uh, Braden…” Adam broke in.

“We were
inside
a pool house,” Braden replied testily, glancing at his wife.

“I’m sorry, man. I know we should have been more careful,” Mark said, sounding miserable. Oh great, now he felt guilty about kissing me in public. If Braden had his way, Mark and I would go join the Amish.

“The picture was romantic, not scandalous,” Lily piped up.

“Where is this picture?” I asked. “I’d like to see it myself.”

“Here, I’ll show you honey,” Jess said, going over to a laptop sitting on a desk. She and I both went over to take a look.

She went to the website of
The Philly Beat
and pulled up a photo of Mark and me standing under the sparkling lights. Our costumes really did make it look like we had stepped out of the 1920’s. My arms were around his neck, and his were around my waist, but one hand was on my bottom holding me up against him. That gave me a little thrill and I felt a flutter in my lower belly. I had to get a copy of that.

“I like it,” I said, not caring what anyone else thought.

“So do I,” Mark, who had walked up beside me agreed. I looked up, surprised, and saw him staring down at me with the hint of a smile playing on his lips. We gazed at each other and shared a moment that made me feel like someone had lit a fire inside me.

“Okay, time to stop falling in love and order some food,” Braden announced. “Let’s try that new Israeli place. Where’s the paper?” Then suddenly, something sunk in, the paper.

“Wait, Mark,
The Philly Beat
! That paparazzo was from the same tabloid as the reporter who was killed. He may have overheard our conversation.” I saw by the look on his face that he acknowledged that these coincidences were piling up a little too quickly.

“You know something about that case?” Gabrielle asked. Mark and I exchanged looks, and with a subtle nod, he told me he was onboard.

“There’s something we want to tell you about…” I began.

6:30 PM

Mark and I took turns telling the story. When we finished, everyone sat quietly for a second and then we all looked at Gabrielle, who was positively glowing.

“No,” Braden told his wife firmly.

“No what?” she asked innocently.

“No to whatever crazy plan you’re coming up with. This woman isn’t a close friend of theirs. She and Beth went to high school together, but they didn’t hang out together, and Mark…” Braden glanced at Mark… “only
me
t her once. Right?”

“Yeah!” Mark insisted.

“This is the chick from Thanksgiving?” Adam laughed. “The one who called you ‘Mike’ and kept talking about Facebook?”

“The very same,” Mark answered giving him an annoyed look.

“And you want to help this woman?” Lily asked, dubiously.

“Gerard took advantage of a teenager to steal a great painting just so he could hang it in his own study. Look, Caitlin
isn’t
a great friend of mine, but that’s just wrong, and he shouldn’t get away with it.” She nodded, understanding my point.

“If that dead reporter is connected to this, Caitlin could be in danger,” Jess pointed out. “Even if she is annoying, that shouldn’t be a death sentence. If it were, Adam would be a goner.” Adam shot her a sarcastic smile.

“Which is why we should tell the cops,” Braden put in, giving her a stern look. “I can’t believe you two climbed through a window,” he growled at Mark and me.

“I can’t believe Gabrielle wasn’t involved,” Cam added.

“Me neither,” Gab agreed sounding disappointed.

“I hate to point this out Braden,” Adam said, “but the Philadelphia police may have more urgent matters than a hearsay report that a nutty party girl, who broke into a house, thinks somebody stole her painting ten years ago.”

“Yeah, there’s no solid evidence that any of this is connected to the dead woman, or that there’s even been a crime committed,” Lily added, “well, other than Caitlin’s breaking and entering of course.”

“I think that in good conscience, we should at least try to see if maybe we could get a little something for them to investigate,” I argued. “Mark said that if he invited us in, and I recognized the painting, it might help.” Braden shot Mark a deadly look and Mark winced a little.

“How would we get him to do that?” Lily asked, knitting her brows.

“The guy is arrogant. He might actually do it for kicks. So, I was thinking maybe we could try at the mystery weekend.”

“That perfect!” Gabbed said, clapping her hands together and practically leaping out of her seat. “We’ll butter him up and make him feel all cocky and see if we can get him to invite us into the study. That’s all we have to do. Beth has a degree in art history and she’s a senator’s daughter. People would take her seriously if she backed Caitlin up.”

“That’s
all
we would have to do?” Jess asked, looking like she didn’t believe her. Considering Gabrielle’s track record, I couldn’t say that I blamed her.

“Fire up the Mystery Machine and pack the Scooby snacks,” Adam said with a grin, “the gang is back in action.”

“I’m not wearing the schoolboy outfit again,” Mark said, looking beaten. “I mean it. I won’t do it.”

“Not schoolboys, honey,” Jess consoled, “famous detectives.”

“I want to be Hercule Poirot,” Cam piped up.

“I think you
enjoy
this stuff,” Braden said, giving him a suspicious look and Cameron laughed tellingly, earning him a suspicious glance from Jess too.

Mark

Monday 8:20 AM

Adam and I talked while we waited for Judge Epstein to take the bench. In the PBD (pre-Beth days) I would have filled him in with lurid details about my weekend, but guys don’t talk about wives and girlfriends that way. Let’s face it nobody wants to be sitting around the dinner table, complementing the pot roast your buddy’s wife cooked up, and picturing her screaming his name. Adam was married to a very sexy woman, who I had imagined screaming
my
name a few times before they got together, but now she was Mrs. Roth, future mother of his children. So, the point is, we kept the conversation pretty general.

“I’m assuming that your one month experiment with celibacy is now ended,” he commented, shuffling through some files.

“Thank you lord,” I replied and he laughed.

“And I assume you figured it out?”

“Yeah, you were right. I didn’t have to think too hard. She was very motivating. In fact, I think I may have been worried deep down that after all the fantasies, reality wouldn’t stack up, but it was even better.”

“Yeah. It’s funny how that works sometimes. So now you’ll be able to get your head back in the game. I was starting to worry about you.”

“I was starting to worry about my clients.”

“Now you’ll be getting laid more than ever before. Maybe you’ll become the next Clarence Darrow.”

“Beth and I decided to focus on work during the week, and make the weekend playtime.”

“That won’t last. The first rough day you have in court you’ll be knocking on her door that night.”

“
What do you mean? I used to make it through the week before no matter how rough it was.”

“Yeah, because after a rough day, who wants to go searching for companionship? But now, you have easy access. I’ll bet you a Benjamin that you don’t even make it through this week.”

“You’re on,” I shot back just as the bailiff came out from the judge’s chambers and called court to session. Judge Epstein, who made Judge Judy look like a sweet and docile young thing, stalked out onto the bench. I saw the Assistant District Attorney and the public defender approach the bench for a conference and the next thing I knew, Judge Epstein was bellowing at Adam and me to join them. Great.

“You two, The PD has to conflict out of some cases. Rather than continue them, I’m going to appoint you to represent the defendants.”

“Your Honor, we would have to continue too,” I replied. “We haven’t had any time to prepare.”

“You can handle the first one this afternoon and then I’ll spread them out through the week. That should be plenty of time to prepare. These guys are not exactly on the FBI’s Most Wanted List.” With that, the matter was decided. Her clerk handed Adam and I each five files. I had a bad feeling about this. I glanced over and saw Adam looking amused and one hundred bucks richer.

Wednesday 5:30 PM

We held a meeting to discuss the details of the mystery weekend and introduce Caitlin to everyone. My court week had already become stressful, but I wasn’t going to give in. It was a matter of principle. I was a grown man and I could control my urge to unwind with Beth beneath me for a few days at least.

“Okay everyone!” Gab said excitedly. “I got our instruction packets with our roles. Cam, I was able to get you Hercule Poirot.”

“Yes!” he said with a smile, earning him several dubious looks.

“Jess, you are going to be Jane Marple,” Gab went on.

“Great, honey. I’ll break out the support hose and join AARP.”

“Braden, you and I will be Nick and Nora Charles.” Braden started to say something but Gab cut him off, “And yes, I got permission for Bruno to be Asta.” Braden smiled. He loved that Chihuahua like a first-born son.

“Adam you will be Phillip Marlowe, and Lily will be V.I. Warshawski.”

“Hey, Lilith. We get to dress like normal human beings,” Adam said, and the two of them high-fived each other.

“Caitlin will be Nancy Drew,” Gab continued.

“Oh! I’ve read her books!” Caitlin looked happy.

“And last, but not least, Beth will be Irene Adler and Mark will be Sherlock Holmes.” Adam laughed. I glared. Great, I could walk around in a deerstalker cap and a cape, and Beth could wear enough clothing to assure that I never get her naked. Then I remembered that this Friday would be the first night her pill was working and I felt like I might cry.

“What’s the schedule like?” Lily asked.

“We show up in costume Friday evening for a late dinner at seven,” Gab answered. “After dinner, we’ll break into teams of two and each team will be given a story card with clues. We try to figure them out and solve the mystery. Saturday morning we’ll have a full breakfast and we’ll all explain our theories about the solution.”

“Wait, I don’t have a partner,” Caitlin said sulkily.

“Yes you do!” said a voice from the corner. We looked at Bruce, who stood there positively glowing, “Meet Charlie Chan.”

“You’re not Asian,” Lily pointed out.

“Neither was anyone who ever played Charlie Chan,” Bruce shot back and she rolled her eyes. Yeah, this was going to be fun.

Friday 6:00 PM

We had all left early to go change and grab an overnight bag, and then met back at the office. I had managed to secure my Sherlock gear, and while I wasn’t thrilled about it, at least it was better than the schoolboy outfit. It had been a week from hell in court, but somehow I had held out for tonight. I seriously needed to unwind, though, and after we got done with whatever we had to do, I was locking Beth and I in our bedroom until morning.

When I got there Adam, Lily, Beth and Caitlin had already arrived. I looked over at Adam wearing a trench coat and a fedora. He looked a little older than twenty-eight maybe, but basically normal. That bastard. Lily was dressed the same way. Caitlin had a red wig on her head and was dressed like she was going to a sock hop. Amazingly, Beth somehow managed to look hot in a Victorian high-collared dress. At least it wasn’t hard to tell she and I were together.

I heard a bark and in came Braden, Gabrielle and Bruno looking like a rich married couple with a dog. That was a stretch. Jess and Cam came in behind them and I tried not to laugh. Cam had an enormous black mustache and a bowler hat, and Jess looked like my grandmother. The best, though, was yet to come. To my great joy, the final person to arrive was Bruce, who actually looked even more stupid than the rest of us put together in a long satin gown, a glue-on Fu Manchu, and a hat that made him look like a Shriner. Adam promptly cracked up and Lily gave Bruce a disdainful look.

“What in the
hell
are you supposed to be?” she asked.

“Charlie Chan!” he answered irritably.

“Charlie Chan wore suits. You look like a walking White Sale. Are those drapery tassels on your head?”

“It’s a traditional Chinese costume. At least I don’t look like a flasher.”

“Okay break it up,” Braden said, like a good Director.

“I have a question,” Cam broke in and we all looked at him expectantly.

“How do we get him to invite us into the study, especially since Caitlin will be there and he knows she would recognize the painting.” Damn. He had a point. We all looked at Gabrielle.

“I’ve given this some thought,” she began.

“Of course you have,” Adam interrupted.

“As long as he invites us into the house, and doesn’t specifically say the study is off limits, we should be okay. So, I say we wait until everyone is asleep and then we head down there. If anyone stops us or catches us, we’ll say we were looking for something to read.”

“All of us together?” I asked. This plan sounded kind of lame.

“You and Beth do things together with the Roth’s,” Bruce said with a smile at Lily who gave him a death glare in return.

“What are they going to do, accuse a senator’s son and daughter of attempted burglary or something?” Gabrielle asked.

“Maybe we should take a picture of the painting while we’re there,” Jess suggested and Cam gave her a proud look. He was rubbing off on her.

“Good idea,” Beth agreed. “Now Caitlin, you’re going to have to be really careful, because Gerard will probably be watching you.”

“I don’t think it will be a problem,” she replied. “Like you said, he’s got lots of hummus.”

“Hummus?” Adam asked, looking confused.

“Hubris,” I said with a smile and he nodded with understanding.

“I guess we have a plan. I think it’s Go Time,” Braden announced, and we all turned and headed out to solve The Mystery of the Nitwit’s Stolen Painting.