Wicked Kiss (Nightwatchers) (10 page)

Julie gave her a sharp look. “That’s not nice.”

“I’m sorry, but it’s true. I mean, it’s just the mall. Do many
people usually get discovered here?”

“You’re mad that she didn’t even notice you.”

“I’m already signed with a real agency in Manhattan. I don’t
need some Trinity-based agency to represent me.”

“Whatever. It’s not like she gave Samantha a card.”

“I don’t want a card,” I said.

A strange tingle went down my arms, like an unseen breeze. I
frowned and glanced around to see what caused it, but there was nothing.

Stephen said that just before stasis, the cold increased. But
this wasn’t cold...more like a bit of electricity charging the air.

Weird.

Jordan gave me an appraising look. “She’s way too short. I
mean, look at her. She’s practically a hobbit.”

I’d had more than enough of these two for one day. “I’m
leaving.”

I had to find Stephen. I’d do another sweep of the mall first.
Maybe he hadn’t left yet.

I couldn’t believe I lost him so easily. When I’d been close—so
close.

“Don’t let me stop you,” Jordan said, then added, “freak.”

It was on the tip of my tongue to say something cruel or
cutting to her back, but I stopped myself. I flicked a glance at Julie, no
longer paying attention to our standoff. She gazed over toward the food
court.

I tried to breathe normally. “I know you’re not going to
believe this, Jordan, but I’m not seeing Stephen. We’re not together in any
possible way. I’m not interested in him.”

Her lips thinned. “Like I care who you might be interested
in.”

“I think you care too much.”

“And I think you’re an idiot.”

“Nice.” I rolled my eyes. “You know, sometimes pulling your
head out of your own ass helps improve your clarity. You should try it
sometime.”

I was sympathetic to her pain, but I refused to be
completely
defenseless here.

“It sucks,” Julie said.

Jordan glanced at her. “What does?”

“Everything. My life, it’s just so depressing.”

Jordan eyed her. “Join the club.”

“Sometimes—” she sniffed and dragged her hand under her nose
“—it all gets so overwhelming. Like today. I felt good when I got here. I felt
good until just a moment ago. And now I feel...so sad....”

“Stupid Stephen,” Jordan said. “He put everybody in a bad
mood.”

“You know how much I hate seeing you so hurt over that
jerk.”

Jordan flicked an uncomfortable glance at me, before returning
her gaze to Julie. “Let’s talk when we have more privacy, okay?”

Julie let out a shaky breath and turned to face us. Her eyes
were filled with tears. “You shouldn’t let him get to you, Jordan. You
shouldn’t. He doesn’t deserve you.”

“I know.”

“No, you don’t. It’s just like me and...and Colin....” Her
bottom lip wobbled.

“You’re not into Colin, are you?” I asked. I wanted to leave,
but I couldn’t while she was in the midst of this impromptu meltdown.

“I didn’t think so, but now that I think about it.” She inhaled
shakily. “Just another example of someone I thought wanted me who only wanted to
use me.”

“We were going to forget about that,” Jordan said
pointedly.

“I can’t forget! And—and now with the modeling agent and you
saying how ugly I am.”

Jordan gasped. “I never said you were ugly!”

“You said that a real modeling agent wouldn’t want me. Wouldn’t
care about me. That I am so ugly that nobody wants to be my friend. I know it.
It’s been like this all my life. It’s why my mother left us.”

Jordan and I exchanged a worried glance. This was going from
bad to worse.

“Relax, Julie. Seriously.” She held her hands out. “Let’s go
get a coffee downstairs and chill out. It’s been a stressful day, but there’s no
reason to freak out.”

Julie was crying now. I just stared at her in shock. I hadn’t
heard any rumors that she was unstable in any way, but this was definitely
unstable behavior, to say the least. And her massive mood change seemed to have
come out of absolutely nowhere.

“Sometimes,” Julie said in shaky bursts, “I hate life.
Everything about it. It’s too hard. I wish I was dead.”

“Don’t say that. Come on...” Jordan reached her hand out.

Julie just shook her head. “Goodbye.”

Before we could do anything, say anything, or even make a move
toward her, she took hold of the railing...

And threw herself over the edge.

Chapter 10

Jordan’s ear-piercing scream sliced through me like a
knife. I raced to the railing to look over with horror. Julie had crashed onto a
food court table and now lay there, her limbs at awkward, unnatural angles.

“Oh, my God,” I whispered, my throat closing. I couldn’t
believe what I was seeing, what I’d just witnessed happen right in front of
me.

Chaos swept through the first floor, through the whole mall.
Screams and cries of horror filled the air, and a rush of bodies swarmed around
Julie.

“Why?” The anguished word wrenched from Jordan’s throat as she
gripped the railing next to me. “What happened? Why would she do that?”

I couldn’t speak. And nothing I said would help this make any
sense.

I stayed with Jordan as we hurried downstairs, but it was too
late. The fall had killed Julie. The ambulance attendants confirmed she was
dead. Jordan started to sob, and she clutched onto me tightly as if she needed
something—anything—to anchor her.

Making everything that much worse was the fact that down here,
so close to the swell of people who’d witnessed Julie’s suicide, my hunger
didn’t let up for a moment. My heart pounded, and I put some distance between
myself and Jordan and everyone else as soon as I could, trying to think. Trying
to rationalize what happened.

I failed.

Nothing could explain this. Nothing could make it better.

The police arrived and asked Jordan some questions.

“I don’t know why she did it.” Jordan’s words were raspy, her
face tear stained. “She was fine. All day. All week. She wasn’t upset or
anything. But she—she just lost it.”

The police officer took her statement, then they took mine,
which was basically the same thing. A teenager had committed suicide in
public.

I didn’t like Julie, but I never would have wished for
something like this to happen to her.

It wasn’t right. Seventeen was way too young to die.

Jordan was in shock. She’d stopped talking and just started to
tremble. I directed her away from the food court and into an alcove of the mall.
She pressed her back up against the wall and called her father to come pick her
up. She was in no shape to drive home.

I gave her the bottle of water I had in my leather bag. She
took it from me with shaking hands and took a sip. She didn’t complain that it
was room temperature.

“It’s my fault,” she said, her voice hollow and broken. “She
was so happy about the modeling agent. I felt bad about Stephen so I had to
bring her down. And—and this happened.”

She’d sunk down to the floor, her long legs pulled tight up
against her chest. I braced my shoulder against the wall. My hunger swirled the
longer I stayed in this busy mall, but I couldn’t just abandon her here. Not
like this.

“It’s not your fault,” I assured her. But really, I didn’t know
what had triggered Julie to end everything in such a horrible, final way. “Was
she depressed? Like not just today, but maybe clinically depressed and on
medication?”

“No.” She frowned. “I mean, I don’t think so. She never said
anything to me.” She drew in a ragged breath. “I didn’t even know she was still
into Colin. I should have known. She was my best friend.”

My heart clenched for her. “Is there anything I can do?”

Finally, this seemed to break through to her. Her brows drew
together and she looked up at me through red, puffy eyes. Her perfectly applied
makeup was only a memory now. Her gaze hardened. “It’s probably your fault this
happened.”

I stepped back, my stomach souring. “You know I had nothing to
do with that. I barely knew Julie.”

“You stole Stephen from me. And now my best friend is dead.”
Tears streamed down her cheeks. “Anything else you want to destroy today?”

My face burned from her words as if she’d struck me, but I
refused to hit back. Not this time. “I’m sorry she’s gone, Jordan. I know how
much you cared about her.”

There was nothing I could say to make it better. It looked like
I could only make it worse by staying. So I left.

If I’d seen any signs of what was going to happen—what Julie
was going to do—I would have done whatever it took to stop her. But as the
moment played over and over in my mind on my way home, I couldn’t think of any
clues to what triggered her mood change. One moment she was fine, the next she
was suicidally depressed.

Like a switch had been flicked in her head.

Every time I closed my eyes I saw her falling over the side of
the railing, like a song on repeat. Over and over.

Between Stephen’s chilling revelations of what was to come for
grays, to eavesdropping on Bishop’s conversation about inconvenient addictions,
to Julie’s suicide, I couldn’t deal with anything else right now. I especially
couldn’t handle being around anyone who triggered my hunger.

I went directly home and locked the door behind me, dropping
down to the floor, and finally released the sobs I’d been trying so hard to hold
inside.

* * *

For the rest of the day, I did my best to avoid the
world. It was my new hobby. It served me well for six hours of solitude.
However, the pizza delivery guy had smelled much better than the pizza had,
which was so unsettling I barely managed to eat more than half the pizza.

Mom called to say she’d arrived at her fabulous resort in
Honolulu, and was going to start exploring immediately. Even long distance she
sounded every bit as thrilled about her spontaneous trip as she had here.
Angelic influence had some serious staying power. I missed her, but I told her
to have a good time and not to worry about me.

After the call, I distractedly flipped through
Catcher in the Rye,
our current read in English. I’d
read it before, so all I really had to do was refresh my memory.

It was late when Cassandra got back. The angel went directly to
the refrigerator to get herself something to eat—more Chinese food
leftovers.

From the kitchen doorway, I warily watched her prepare a plate.
She looked over her shoulder at me, and her eyes narrowed.

“You didn’t tell me you kissed Bishop,” she said. There was
accusation in her tone.

I cringed. “Good evening to you, too.”

She put her plate down and spun to face me, her eyes flashing
with blue light. “Do you know how dangerous that was?”

Her words were harsh and unexpected. My eyes filled with
tears.

“I’m sorry,” she said, her brows drawing together. She drew
closer to me. “I’m sure you know it’s dangerous. I don’t have to tell you.”

“I didn’t know he had a soul at the time. Neither did he.” Not
much of an excuse, but it was true.

Her frown remained as she studied me. “You’re upset.”

I inhaled shakily and ran my hand under my nose. “You could say
that.”

“Why?”

“Oh, let me think.” I tried not to sound sarcastic, but failed.
“I’m a soulless monster you and your buddies have the authority to knife in the
heart at any given moment.” I chose not to share what I’d learned from
Stephen—or even that I’d seen him. Not yet. And not with her. “Other than that,
I—I witnessed somebody kill herself today.”

Her face blanched. “Kill herself?”

I nodded. “It was terrible. Right in front of me. She jumped to
her death.”

Her mouth worked, but nothing came out for a moment. “Just like
that. No warning?”

“No.”

I tried to swallow past the lump in my throat.

“Where were you?”

“The Trinity Mall. I’m sure it’ll be in the paper tomorrow.
Probably already on the internet tonight.” I shivered.

She opened her mouth as if to say something, but then closed
it. Her grave expression didn’t change. “I’m sorry you had to witness something
like that. You’ve had to deal with so much.”

All I could offer was a meager shrug. “I just wish I could have
stopped her.”

“Some things can’t be stopped.”

Cassandra didn’t touch her food, instead throwing it in the
garbage as if she’d lost her appetite. I wasn’t sure what to make of her change
in mood.

“I’m going to bed,” I said. It was late. I was tired. And
whether I liked it or not, I had school tomorrow.

“You need to stay away from him,” she said as I turned to leave
the kitchen.

I froze and looked over my shoulder at her. “Who?”

She just looked at me patiently. “Bishop’s mind isn’t working
right because of his fall—because of the burden of his soul. He tries very hard
to ignore this and do his job anyway, but if he was fully lucid, he’d see the
risk of being anywhere near you.”

I grappled for something to say. “I don’t want to hurt him.
It’s the last thing I want.”

“If you’re not careful, that’s exactly what you’ll do.”

There wasn’t anything else to say, or nothing that came
immediately to mind. I escaped to my bedroom with thoughts racing, and a sick
feeling in the pit of my stomach.

After failing to get any real answers out of Stephen, I was at
a temporary loss with my plan of action. I’d have to look for him. Maybe he’d
contact me again.

Maybe, maybe, maybe.

Too many maybes.

Tomorrow was Monday. I had school bright and early. I hadn’t
given up hope so much that I planned to start cutting classes. Going to school
represented my continuing hold on my future—and that I had a future to hold on
to. Despite any drama I faced outside of McCarthy High, I’d keep up my grades so
I could go to my first choice college next year. One day, my life would be far
outside of the Trinity city limits.

It
would
happen.

I sat at my vanity table and brushed all the tangles out of my
long, wild mane of hair. I planned to get it cut to a more manageable length so
I wouldn’t always have to pull it back into a ponytail, but I hadn’t gotten
around to it yet.

I stared at my reflection for a long time, trying to see some
sign of the supernatural in my eyes. I knew it had to be there, since I had
enough of it swirling around inside of me, but they looked the same as always.
Brown. And currently filled with anxiety.

The room was stifling. I’d cranked the heat when I got home and
despite my constant chills, I desperately needed some fresh air. I went to the
window and pushed it open, inhaling deeply. It made me shiver, but the cold
October air helped clear some of the fog from my head.

Then I turned to my bed and grabbed the sheets—but I froze in
midpull.

After staying at a low level ever since getting back home from
the mall, my hunger suddenly surged to the forefront. My breath caught and held
as I sensed his presence.

“You shouldn’t leave your window open,” Bishop said. “Anyone
might be able to get in.”

I spun to face him, my eyes wide with shock at what I was
seeing. But there he stood, framed by moonlight near the open window.

A gorgeous, blue-eyed, six-foot tall angel of death was
standing in my bedroom.

I grappled for something to say, anything at all. My pulse
raced. “How did you...” I gestured at the window behind him, my gauzy curtains
fluttering with the cool breeze. “This is the second floor and there’s no ladder
or tree out there.”

My flustered reaction made him smile, an expression that shot
right to my heart. “I have a few hidden talents.”

His gaze lowered to my clothes—or, rather, lack of them. My
cheeks started to burn. I certainly wasn’t naked, but a snug tank top and a
loose pair of sleeping shorts weren’t exactly modest.

I fought the urge to cross my arms over my chest. It wasn’t
like I had that much to cover. “Why are you here?”

It sounded much ruder than I meant it. Seeing him gave me a
wild inner thrill that I tried to cover, especially after my conversation—or
warning—
with Cassandra earlier. Seeing Bishop
alone like this was dangerous. It triggered my hunger like nothing else in the
world.

He shouldn’t be here and he knew it, too.

But here he was anyway.

Bishop wrenched his gaze back up to my face. It took him a
moment to say something, and the weighted silence stretched between us. “I
wanted to check on you. Make sure you’re all right.”

I sent a quick glance over my shoulder at my closed bedroom
door. “Be quiet or Cassandra will hear us.”

He didn’t come any closer to me. He stayed by the window, which
helped me keep most of my head together. “She knows what happened...between us.
Did she tell you?”

I nodded. “But I already knew.”

His gaze met mine directly as he studied me, frowning. Then
clarity crossed his expression. “You know, I’m really not thrilled with this
handy eavesdropping skill of yours.”

I bit my bottom lip. I was so cold that goose bumps had broken
out over my bare skin. I crossed them, shivering. “I can’t control it. It just
happens.”

He turned to the window and closed it. “What did you hear?”

A thousand different emotions bubbled inside me and I wanted to
force them down and keep my game face on. Pretend that nothing affected me. Too
bad
everything
affected me lately. My analytical and
detached view of the world around me had dropped away, leaving me completely raw
and vulnerable.

Bishop affected me. Sometimes I forgot how much, when he wasn’t
this close to me, but he did. His scent, his presence, his warmth—everything
called to me across the six tiny feet separating us right now. I wanted to close
that distance, throw my arms around him and kiss him passionately. It was a need
like eating, sleeping—a primal drive I couldn’t ignore.

I gripped the baseboard of my bed, digging my short fingernails
into the smooth wood, and tried to stay calm. “You said that this...what you
feel for me...it’s an inconvenient addiction.” I looked at him directly. “And
yet here you are at midnight in my bedroom. Not smart.”

His expression tightened. “I wish you hadn’t heard that.”