What She Left Us (8 page)

Darren
was telling her that they would figure everything out when Jenna said, “There’s
nothing to figure out.”

“I
know honey, but it will be okay.”

“Stop
saying that, nothing is okay,” she snapped at him. “Just shut up, please. I
cannot hear myself think. Just please drive.” She pushed his hand away from her
leg.

He
followed the ambulance into the ER entrance and parked the car. Jenna got out
and rushed over to the ambulance as soon as the EMTs moved to the back of the
vehicle. An orderly came out of the ER and rushed to the back of the ambulance.
He recognized Darren.

“Darren,
hey buddy,” he said to him.

“Hey,
it’s Jenna’s mother,” he, motioning toward Jenna.

“Oh
man, I’m sorry. The guys called it in. You know she’s DOA?”

That’s
when Jenna lost it. She collapsed to the ground and started wailing. Darren
called for more help as he reached for Jenna. She wept uncontrollably, clinging
to Darren, crying for her mother, saying, please don’t be dead, you’re not
dead, don’t be dead, that it was too soon, and she was too young to not have a
mom anymore.

Darren
pulled her to a sitting position and looked at her. “Jenna, Jenna, hold on
baby, you’ll be okay. I’m here with you. I’m going to take care of you forever.
I promise. I won’t let anything bad happen to you baby. I love you.”

“It’s
too late. It’s too late. The bad’s already happened. The bad’s already here.”

**

Courtney
looked at her sister who was still sitting in the driver’s seat but not making
any move to get out of the car. “You ready to go in?” she asked.

“Not
really,” Jenna said.

“The
sooner we get in and have our blood taken, the sooner we’ll be done and that
much closer to having this be over with.”

“I
know. I was thinking about Mom. I never did tell you about that night I found
her.”

“Not
now. Come on, hon, you’ve got to get a grip. Okay?”

Jenna
didn’t say anything. The keys were still in the ignition. Van Morrison played
on the radio.

Courtney
missed Mitch and wished he were there with her. He had played
Brown Eyed
Girl
for her on the guitar that day at the gazebo. Maybe she should have
asked him to come home with her? No, it was too soon. And now, she was
especially glad she hadn’t brought him home to this mess of a discovery. That
would have sparked the end of whatever was happening between them. He did not
need to come home with her to discover she and her sister were facing a
possible health crisis. It would have been a complete disaster.

Not
cool at all.

But
the more Courtney thought about it, the more she thought that Darren should be
there. Her sister had really screwed that one up. She didn’t understand what
the hell had happened, but he had been part of their family, what was left of their
little family, for the past two years. He was like an older brother to Courtney
and she did miss him terribly.

“Okay,”
Jenna took a deep breath. “I’m ready.” She took the keys out of the ignition,
and just like that, opened the car door, got out and slammed it shut.

“Go
time,” she said.

It
seemed to Jenna that she watched a lot of television at Mrs. Crand’s that very
first day. But after those horrible raisin oatmeal cookies, things got only a
tiny bit better. The kitten curled up on her lap on the couch, and Mrs. Crand
stopped asking all those nosy questions about her new baby sister for a while.
She kept coming into the family room to sit next to her though, and she had
that old lady smell. She did not smell like a nice little perfumy lady. She
smelled like a stinky old bathroom that needed to be cleaned. And dirty old cat
poo. Jenna tried not to inhale when Mrs. Crand came near her. Unfortunately, she
was near her a lot that first day.

After
a bazillion episodes of
The People’s Court,
which Mrs. Crand had
recorded on VHS, the doorbell finally rang and Jenna heard her father’s voice
in the foyer.

“Thank
you so much for keeping Jenna for us today,” he said.

“Yes,
well she was a pleasure, quiet little girl she is, though,” Mrs. Crand said.

“I’m
sure she’s worried and wants to come home,” Jenna heard her father say.

Jenna
lifted the kitten from her lap and ran out to see her dad.

“Hey
pumpkin!” he reached out and lifted her up to him.

“Daddy!
Where’s Mommy and Court-Court?”

“We’ll
talk about that when we get home sweetie,” he said. And then to Mrs. Crand, he
said, “Thanks again for your help. Would it be all right if she stayed with you
tomorrow too?”

Jenna
tugged on her father’s pant leg to indicate she didn’t like that idea.

“Anything
you need, Frank. When do you think the baby will be home?” she asked.

“It’s
hard to say, they’ve got to run some tests,” he replied. Then he led Jenna out
the door. She was never so glad to leave a stinky old house before in her life
but she was going to kind of miss that kitten.

When
they got back to their house, Jenna said, “I don’t want to go to Mrs. Crand’s
tomorrow Daddy.”

Jenna’s
dad sat her down. “You have to go honey. Baby Court-Court is going to be in the
hospital for a little while.”

“Why?
Is it because I gave her the pacifier?” Jenna started crying. “I did such a bad
thing, didn’t I? You and Mommy told me and I didn’t listen!”

“No
sweetie! It has nothing to do with you. Nothing at all. She was born with a
problem and she has to stay there to get fixed for a little while. That’s all.
Everything will be okay but she’s going to be at the hospital for a while.”

“Can
I see her?” Jenna asked through tears.

“No
honey, they won’t let little kids into the baby part of the hospital. It’s not
safe for the babies, or for you. Too many germs.”

“Is
Mommy coming home?”

“Yes,
she’ll be home for part of the time, but some days you will have to stay over
at Mrs. Crand’s house.”

“Yuck!
I hate it over there! She’s smelly and she makes raisin cookies! And she is so
nosy and the only nice kitty is the teeny one. All the others make mean
growlies at me. I don’t want to go there. Can I go to work with you? Please?”
Jenna begged.

“Oh
hon,” her dad ran his hands through his hair. Jenna felt bad all of a sudden. Like
maybe she did cause all of this but her parents were saying that she didn’t just
to protect her. Maybe she did. She should probably stop all the whining and begging
and be a good kid or something else bad might happen.

“I’m
sorry Daddy. I need to be a big girl and a good big sister. I’ll do whatever I
need to do so Courty gets better.”

“That’s
my good girl. She will get better. It’s just going to take some time at the
hospital and lots of medicine. She’s a sick little baby right now. But she’ll
be okay. And we have to be really nice to Mommy. This is going to be hard on
her. When she gets home you have to be a super big girl and a big helper for
her. No whining or crying. You have to be like a grown up. You’re my big good
girl, okay? Promise me?”

“I
promise Daddy. Anything for my baby sister,” Jenna said.

“Pinky
promise?” her dad asked, putting his smallest finger out which still loomed
large in Jenna’s eyes.

Jenna
reached her tiny finger out to her father’s and linked it up with his.

“Pinkies.”

Courtney
and Jenna filled out separate medical forms at the doctor’s office where they answered
everything about their current and past health situations, their lifestyle and
family history. Then they were both brought into one of the small medical rooms
and told to wait for Dr. Rhetler. Jenna had done some research on hemochromatosis
and discovered that Dr. Rhetler was the best doctor in the field in their area
and she wanted to be seen by someone who specialized in the disease. She wanted
to make sure she got all the answers to her questions and she wanted the right
answers immediately. Courtney still thought she was overreacting, but she said
nothing as they waited in the room.

Courtney
hopped onto the examining table while Jenna sat in one of the chairs. “Hand me
that magazine, will you,” she asked her older sister.

“Which
one?”

“The
one with Ryan on the cover,” Courtney said.

“How
can you read at a time like this?” Jenna asked, flipping the magazine to Courtney.

“We’re
getting our blood drawn,” Courtney said, “They’re not cutting us open and
tearing out our organs.”

“Yet,”
Jenna replied.

“Relax.”

They
sat in silence for a while, Jenna worrying about what would happen when they would
both be inflicted with the terrible disease and have no one to take care of
them but each other, while Courtney flipped through the magazine and wondered
what Mitch was doing on his fall break. She thought of his lips and his arms, and
his amazing eyelashes, and how she’d much rather be in his room instead of in
this crappy doctor’s office with her moody sister.

There
was a tap on the door and a woman entered the room. “Good morning ladies,” she
chirped.

“Hi,”
Jenna and Courtney said at the same time.

“I’m
Dee, and I’ll be doing your blood draws for the test this morning.”

“But
I thought Dr. Rhetler would be doing that,” Jenna started. Courtney glared at
her sister.

Dee
smiled kindly. “Oh, Dr. Rhetler doesn’t do the blood draws, but she’ll be in
later to chat with you two. Who wants to go first?”

Courtney
offered her arm right away. She wasn’t scared or worried at all, and she
figured Jenna would whine or have something negative to say if she went first
and Courtney wasn’t in the mood to hear it. She figured if she went first maybe
she could sneak out and grab a coffee and a muffin while it was her sister’s
turn. She was starving.

“Okay
then, looks like we don’t even need you to switch places, huh?” Dee asked.
“We’ll do one arm first and then the other. And I’ll draw a couple vials from
each arm.”

“No
problem,” Courtney smiled and rolled up her sleeve.

Jenna
looked up from her seat across the small room. “Should we be worried?
Seriously? I mean, our mom died from this disease. That’s why we’re here
getting tested. In case we have the hereditary gene.”

Courtney
shot a glance at her sister. God, she wished her sister would shut up already.
She turned and smiled apologetically to Dee, like she knew Dee didn’t need to
hear all of this shit when all she was trying to do was draw some blood, do her
job. Dee concentrated on cleaning the site where she would stick Courtney’s
vein, but she did say, “Oh honey, I’m sorry. I didn’t know that’s why you girls
are here. I didn’t get through all of your paperwork. But I’m sure Dr. Rhetler
will talk to you about everything, about the risks and the preventatives you
can take if the tests come out positive. Sometimes they don’t though, come out
positive, you know.”

“Well,
what’s the likelihood of that?” Jenna asked.

“Jenna!
Can’t you see that Dee is trying to stick a needle in me? Let her concentrate
please!” Courtney said through clenched teeth. How could she love her sister so
much yet be so annoyed with her at the same time.

“And
here, let me just… stay still Courtney, I’ve almost got it in… and here we are.
Don’t move, and there!” Dee announced with flourish and the needle was in and
she was filling tubes with bright red blood for the first draw.

Jenna
sat quietly through Courtney’s second blood draw on the other arm, as Dee explained
why it was necessary to do two separate draws for the hemochromatosis blood
test. Something about how one was for the protein and one was for the liver,
but at this point, Courtney wasn’t really paying attention; she just wanted to
get out of there. She was hungry, felt clammy and flushed, and was completely
annoyed.

She
was annoyed with her sister, tired of being home when it wasn’t even home any
longer, and really ready to get back to school and see what was going on with
Mitch and where the rest of the semester might lead.

“Okay
Courtney, you’re all done. Let’s switch spots and get Jenna up here now,” Dee
said as she slid the needle from her arm, and carefully placed a bandage on the
site.

Jenna
stood up, looking pale, but made the seat change with Courtney, who tried to
give a sympathetic smile to her sister. “You’ll be fine,” Courtney said.

Jenna
couldn’t let her blood draw go by without an “ouch!” and a “that stings” and
when she was done, she made a big show of asking if the areas would bruise and
if she should ice them when she got home. Courtney couldn’t help but roll her
eyes at her sister, and Dee smiled a sympathetic smile at her when Jenna was
looking down at her arms.

“Hang
tight girls. Dr. Rhetler will be in shortly.”

“Thanks,
Dee,” Courtney said.