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Authors: Kris Bell

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“Tara, I don’t care what you say. I’m not talking to him right now.”

My best friend and I sat on my sofa early on Saturday evening, a week after the incident at Richie’s place. We were supposed to be having some quality “girl time,” but with my cell phone ringing off the hook, it was kind of hard to get into the swing of things. We were about the give each other pedicures when my phone went off once more. Richie’s name popped up on my cell phone's home screen. While Tara wanted me to answer the call and squash things with Richie, I couldn’t bring myself to do it. I sent him to voicemail.

“Izzy, what is the point of you giving him the silent treatment?” Tara started. Pretty in her blue tank and shorts, she sat crossed legged on the floor in front of me, my feet in her hands. “The man can only apologize but so much before you have to forgive him.”

I crossed my arms in defiance. “Well, he didn’t apologize enough.”

“Girl, what the hell did he do to deserve this level of Ice Queenly-ness?”

I sighed and retold how I came to his house to see a half-naked Chloe tonguing him down.

“Yeah, I heard you the first time you told me, chick,” Tara said in slight aggravation as she buffed my toenails smooth. “But you’re not telling me anything worth you being this bitchy to him. So she tricked your ass again. What does that have to do with him? If anything, you should whoop
her
ass.”

“So he’s free and clear?” I said incredulously. “Tara, he let her spend the night with him. He was kissing her like he loved her. In front of me! I can’t believe you won’t take my side on this.”

Rolling her eyes up at me, Tara replied, “I never said he was right for letting her get close to him again knowing how bat-shit crazy she is, but let me ask you this. When he spotted you, did he push her away or keep holding her?”

“He pushed her away.”

“Hmm, that’s a funny reaction for a man to have when the person who walked in on him is
not even his girlfriend
. He knew he was wrong, Izzy, but what I find even more amazing than that is the fact that neither of y’all claim to be feeling the other, yet and still, when he kissed another woman, you felt jilted and he felt guilty.”

“What are you trying to say?”

“Girl, are you that dense? He cares about you and you obviously care about him. Why else would you get so bent out of shape for a man you claim you don’t have feelings for? Do yourself a favor and claim that man for your own. After you beat Chloe’s ass, of course. You have
got
to get her out of the picture.”

I sighed. “Tara, Richie and I aren't like that. We're just-”

“'Just friends'? Yeah, you keep saying that. For the love of everything you hold dear on this earth, Izzy, please cool it with the 'just friends' bit. Everyone is tired of hearing it, especially since we all know it's bull. Why can’t you just admit that he’s right for you?”

I didn’t answer. I knew Tara made sense. I had more peace of mind when Richie was close to me. That warm, tingling sensation that I used to get with Kyle when we first started seeing each other dissipated rather quickly and I didn’t feel it again until Richie Reyes came into the picture. It was like I had known him all of my life, though it had only been a few months. But seeing him kiss Chloe hurt me deep, deeper than I thought it would. I couldn’t really explain why, but I felt betrayed. Had Kyle ruined me on men? Ugh…perish the thought.

My phone rang again. I checked the screen. This time it was Rhys. I didn’t answer. 

“Was that your man again?” Tara asked with a wicked grin. I rolled my eyes at her and told her who it was.

“Ok, so now you’re not even taking calls from Rhys? What the hell, Izzy? Are you on your period or something? What the hell did
he
do to you?”

Hmm! In my determination to hate Richie, I had completely forgotten to tell Tara about what happened at Rhys’ place the night before I went to see Richie. Quickly, I retold the incident.

By the time I finished, Tara sat on the floor looking up at me with the dumbest expression on her face. It was a like she smelled a sewer for the first time: not very pleasant.

“He told you
what?
He did
what?
God, this is starting to sound like a bad MTV reality show. How did you forget to tell me this, Izzy?”

Shrugging my shoulders I said, “I don’t know. I guess I was wrapped up in Richie this week. Sort of slipped my mind.”

“Okay, so let me get this straight. Rhys told you that he regrets marrying Tiffany and that he wishes he had gotten with you instead because he sees you with Richie and now he’s jealous?”

“Yep.”

“AND you two shared an amazing kiss that a call from Richie just so happened to interrupt and you ended up leaving Rhys hanging? You didn’t sleep with him?”

“No, Tara, I couldn’t.  Years ago, I would have loved to be claimed by him, but that ship has sailed. He’s had all the time in the world to make a move on me and he waited until the worst time imaginable. He’s like a little kid who doesn’t know what his favorite toy is until he sees someone else playing with it. I can’t put myself out like that. What would happen if he got bored with me? When I’m no longer the catch of the day? No, I couldn’t do that to us, to our friendship.”

“But it’s Rhys. You love Rhys.”

“Yeah, as a friend. Nothing else.”

“Because Richie is more important.”

“Ye-” I cut myself off before I could get the whole word out. I regretted saying it the moment my vocal cords went to work. Judging from the way Tara’s eyes widened, I knew she had tricked me into admitting that little bit of information.

“Ha! I knew it!” Tara jumped up and started dancing around my living room like a clown. I refused to acknowledge her even though I could feel my face heating up. I can’t believe I had admitted I liked Richie more than Rhys. What in the world was wrong with me?

“Tara, sit down please!” I yelled once I spotted her doing the Cabbage Patch. “There’s no need for you to get your simple ass all worked up.”

“‘No reason’? Girl, you just proved my whole point. You do love Richie. That’s why your ass was so damn mad when you saw him with Chloe.”

My cell phone suddenly started going bananas. As soon as I denied one call, another one came. Rhys
and
Richie were calling back to back. Good grief.

“Just answer your phone!”

“No!” I said angrily as I got up and went to the kitchen. Tara followed me. Grabbing a glass from my dish rack, I proceeded to pour a drink. Milk was my poison of choice for the night. Tara watched me take a swig as I tried to get my nerves together.

“Honey, I’m not trying to make you mad or nothing. It just frustrates the hell out of me to see you so happy with someone, and then throw them away because you can’t let go of this ‘friend’ bullshit. If you love someone, you love them. End of story.”

I didn’t respond. Off in the background, I heard my cell phone ring again. Grunting in frustration, I went back to the living room to retrieve it, but it went silent before I reached it.

I came back into the kitchen with my phone in hand. Tara, polishing off her own glass of milk, frowned. "Which one was it this time?"

“Neither. That was Lawanda.”

Tara rolled her eyes. "Why in the hell would she even be trying to talk to you after what she did?”

I sat at my dinette table. Tara followed suit. “Well,” I began, “word around the street is that she actually feels sorry for ‘embarrassing’ me and wants to make amends.”

Tara snorted in disgust. “Please tell me you’re not going to fall for that shit? She was screwing your man the whole time y’all were together. If anyone needs to be getting the voicemail, it’s her.”

I nodded in agreement. “I’ll eventually forgive her, but I’ll never forget. We’ll never be cool again. Any female I can’t trust is a female who can kiss my ass.”

“A-fuckin-men!” Tara gave me a high five and we shared a laugh.

“It’s just as well, though,” I said after the laugh died down. “I wasn’t really feeling Kyle for a while. I knew something was different. I just didn’t want to accept the reality of the situation.”

“Frankly speaking, I think everyone is living in Never Never Land right now. Lawanda trying to act like her shit don’t stink. Rhys wants to drown his marital sorrows in between your legs, and Riche…well, Richie is like Superman with a special kryptonite necklace named Chloe Childs.”

“Well, at least you’re not bringing any drama my way.”

“Hmm! I don’t know about that. My feet are looking pretty jacked up and if you don’t get your funky tail into the living room and give me my pedicure, I'm going to bring a whole lot of drama to you.”

I laughed hard at my silly best friend. I finished the rest of my milk and told her to come back into the living room where everything was set up.

I was about to grab her feet and commence to polishing when my cell phone rang yet again. Sighing hard in exasperation, Tara jumped up and snatched it off the couch without checking the caller Id.

“Hello?” she said roughly.

I mouthed to her, “Who is it?”

Tara’s face became ashen as she moved the phone from her ear and looked at me. My heart dropped into my stomach. This couldn’t be good.

I got up from my spot on the sofa and grabbed the phone from Tara. She didn’t waste any time fighting me for it. She gave me the phone and then ran to my bedroom.

I glanced at the number on the screen but I didn't recognize it. “Hello, who is this?”

“This is Rosemary Cummings. I’m a nurse at Sentara Hospital. I’m trying to locate Anna Parrish’s next of kin. Her daughter, uh, Isabel Maldonado.”

I felt cold all over. This is not the type of phone call I expected to get. And to think I almost ignored it along with the rest. Just the thought of that nauseated me.

“This is she.”

“Ok, darling. I’m sorry to have to call, but we received your mother here in the ER. She’s been injured. She gave us your name and number for us to contact you. Could you please come?”

“Has she been, I mean is she badly hurt? I mean, do I have to call the rest of our family?” I tried so hard to sound strong, but I knew I was coming off like a sad child, which was fine considering that was how I felt at the present moment.

From the corner of my eye, I saw Tara reemerge from my bedroom fully dressed with her car keys in hand. She stood, waiting for me to finish on the phone. How did I get so lucky to have a friend like her? My eyes welled up with unshed tears.

“All of that will be discussed in detail with the doctor when you get here, but I assure you, she won’t be here long.”

“WHAT?” I yelled. I began to panic. “What are you talking about? Is my mother about to die? What happened?”

“No, no! I only meant that she will be discharged soon!” the nurse said hurriedly. Evidently, she had realized the error of her words, but that didn’t calm me down a whole lot. My mother was still in the hospital. When is that ever a good thing?

I finished taking down the necessary information from the nurse, thanked her and hung up the phone. Without a word, I found some clothes to throw on and Tara and I ran out of the house to see about my mama.

RICHIE

I had spent the better part of the week trying to get a hold of Isabel, but she wasn’t taking my calls. It was Saturday night, and though I was at the gym with Rhys, I still stole away a few times to call. But my baby wouldn't talk to me.

I don’t know why I was so cut up about it. Wait! Yeah, I do. I was a dumb shit giving Chloe the ammunition she needed to set me up. I was an even dumber shit to let Isabel go without a fight. It had been a week and I was miserable knowing she was mad at me.

Before Rhys and I had started with our first set of handballs, I had asked if he had spoken to her. My boy balled his face up and muttered “nope” and didn’t say another word.

The game was in full sway. I tried to channel all of my frustrations into that tiny ball, but from the way Rhys was playing, I figured he needed to blow off more steam than me. He swung and served like a wild man.

“Fuck!” Rhys yelled as he missed a hit. Instead of taking the next serve, my boy proceeded to throw a tantrum, cursing and pacing back and forth kicking all the loose balls out of his way.

“Hey, Rhys! What is going on with you tonight?” I yelled at him.

Rhys stormed past me. “My head isn't in this game.”

“Obviously not,” I muttered as I followed him off the court and into the adjoining locker room. It was empty. He sat down on a bench in front of his locker, head down, shoulders slumped.

“Rhys, what’s going on?” I asked quietly. With all my issues going on, I still noticed a change in my best friend’s mood. It was almost like he was sad. “Is it Tiff?”

Rhys sat up and looked me square in the eye. “It’s everything.”

“Talk to me.” I sat next to my boy and waited for him to spill.

Taking a deep breath, Rhys began. “I messed up. Royally. I really thought I had a good woman on my arm. In the beginning, she did everything right. I had no cause for complaints. She was everything I asked for, everything I wanted. And now I have a wife who spends her time running the streets behind your ex, spending money I haven’t even made yet and won’t sleep with me. But she won't hesitate to screw somebody else.”

“Whoa!” I held my hands up. “What are you talking about dude? You think Tiffany is cheating on you?”

“I don’t think. I know. C'mon, Richie! With all the women we’ve had in life, you know you can spot when one of them is hiding something. I know the tricks of the trade. Staying out all night, using her friends as alibis. Coming in and going straight into the shower. The other night when we were lying in bed, she called out another man’s name in her sleep. I’m not stupid, Richie. I know she’s been with someone else.”

I didn’t know what to say. I didn’t think Tiffany was all that special when she and Rhys first started dating. She seemed to make him happy, though, so I didn’t have any objections. But never would I have thought she would be capable of being so scandalous. Never did I think I'd have to comfort my friend over a failing marriage.

“What now? Are you two going to divorce? I know you’re not going to stay with her now. You need me to tap one of the lawyers in my firm for you?”

Rhys turned and looked at me. “Yeah, eventually.”

“Eventually? No, you need one right now. Why would you even want to stay married to her and she’s bringing you down like this? My god, you’re starting to sound like a naive teenage girl!”

Rhys chuckled. I slapped him on his back and stood up. “You’re going to get through this, Rhys. We’ve been through worse together. You know I got your back, and just like you told me when my dumbass was caught up with Chloe, the sooner you get rid of that bitch, the sooner you can find a real woman.” I stepped away from Rhys and walked to my locker. I opened the lock and took out my gym bag. It was probably safe to say Rhys and I were done working out for the day.

Rhys shook his head and said, “That’s the messed up part. I already found a good woman.”

Frowning, I asked him who. “I don’t remember you talking about another woman. You meet someone else already?”

“No. I’m talking about Izzy.”

I dropped my fresh clothes back into by gym bag, and looked at my boy like he was crazy. His “new good woman” was Isabel?
My
Isabel?

“Don’t look at me like that, Richie, and don’t act like you didn’t already know.”

“No, I don’t know! Refresh my memory. Isabel is your good woman?"

“Look, Richie, you know you’re my boy and I wouldn’t do anything to hurt you, but I kissed her last week.”

“Hold up. You
kissed
her?” I hated the sound of jealousy riding low in my voice. I knew I had no right to be jealous of Rhys, but I couldn't help it. Isabel wasn’t mine any more than she was his, but the thought of him touching her pissed me off.

“Yeah, I kissed her. She came over to my place to hang out, and I just got to thinking about how sweet she was. I never really paid any attention to her, never took the time to look at her. She was a buddy. Someone I could chill with and talk to, but ever since y’all started hanging out, she just seemed different to me. Izzy went from being 'just a friend' to being 'the one that got away.' I've noticed how she smiles more, she has confidence. I didn't bring that out of Izzy. You did. I got jealous and I made a move on her. I’m sorry.”

I didn’t know what to say. Rhys still remained slumped down on the bench in front of his locker, staring, waiting for me to respond to his confession. I couldn't, though. The only thing on my mind was the fact that
I
didn’t even get to kiss her yet. Rhys beat me to the punch. I didn't know how to feel about that.

“So, now what?” I asked after I finally found my voice. “Are you two going to start up a relationship, take things to the next level?”

Say no. Please, say no.

“Naw, man. She turned me down.”

Thank you, Jesus.

Rhys stood up taking a deep breath, then leveled his gaze on me. “Last week when she was at my place, you called her cell phone. The reason she didn’t answer is because you interrupted us. I had her hemmed up against the wall in my foyer. I didn’t want her to leave, but she told me I was too late and she left anyway. The only thing that happened that night besides the kiss was me spending the night alone picking pieces of my face from off the floor.”

Silent, I starting picking at random shit in my gym bag trying to get my thoughts together and my budding anger under control. Everything in me knew I was wrong for feeling like I wanted to punch my best friend in the face for touching the woman I cared for, but I couldn't deny that was the way I felt. Truthfully, I had no one to blame but myself. He had the balls to do what I was too chicken shit to do. If nothing else, the person I should be pissed with is me. If I had been man enough, I would have made my move on Isabel the moment I realized how wonderful she was. She never would have had to deal with Kyle and his bullshit, nor would she have had to see me and Chloe together.

I didn’t say anything for a few moments while I got my clothes and toiletries together for my post-game shower. I could tell Rhys was waiting for me to lay into him. He leaned against his locker, sweaty from the game, arms crossed and lips drawn tight. I refused to give him more than a glance. The tension surrounding us hung thick in the air, but I didn't know how to break it. I wasn't even sure if I wanted to.

“So, that’s it?” he asked a few agonizing minutes later. “You’re not going to say anything to me?”

“What do you want me to say, Rhys?”

“How about ‘what the hell is wrong with you?’ Or ‘why did you kiss my woman?’"

I sighed heavily and dropped my head to my chest. My hands stopped roaming through my gym bag. “Isabel is not my woman," I said quietly, still not meeting Rhys' gaze. "She can do whatever she wants.”

“Oh my god, Richie! Will you please pull your head from out of your ass for a second and be real for once in your goddamn life?”

I turned and looked at Rhys. He stood next to me, breathing hard, his sleeveless t-shirt damp with sweat. My gaze went down to his hands, which kept clenching and unclenching. Rhys wanted to hit me, and that pissed me off.

“Rhys, first of all, don’t come at me like that. Second of all, what is your problem?”

“My problem is simple,” Rhys said angrily. “I admit my mistakes. I know when I fuck up a good thing, but you don’t. You can be such an ignorant bitch sometimes that you can’t even tell when you lost a game and you need to reset. That’s my problem.”

“Are we talking about handball?”

“No, we're not fucking talking about handball!” Rhys yelled. “You dense son of a bitch! I’m talking about you dealing with Chloe and refusing to deal with Isabel. You would rather get your ass handed to you on a regular basis by a woman who means you no good than to pursue a woman you know for a fact would love you! That’s what I mean! You were with Chloe for years and I stood by and watched her break your heart so many fucking times, and yet you kept making excuses for her. Isabel would never hurt you the way Chloe did, but you can’t see that because you choose to stay blind. I know right now you’re pissed because I kissed Izzy, but your timid ass isn't going to tell me so. Why don’t you just man the fuck up and be real with yourself for once?”

“Rhys, I don’t know where the hell all this is coming from, but you don’t know how shit about what happened between me and Chloe! Yeah, she did me dirty a few times, but-”

Rhys threw his hands in the air and shook his head. “See, there you go again. Making excuses. And I do know a lot that's happened between you and Chloe. Even if you didn't tell me every damn time she broke your heart--which you did--I'm not blind. I've been your best friend for most of my life and I
know you.
So don't tell me I don't know what I'm talking about.

"You know Chloe Childs is poison. She's the worst kind of female, but you got this grand idea that she's your ‘perfect woman.' You refuse to acknowledge the fact that your vision of this 'perfect woman' isn't Chloe. This vision doesn't even exist. Richie, you got to let that shit go. You might be missing out on the best thing that ever happened to you because of this stupid hang up you have about the type of woman you want."

I was stunned. Rhys came at me with an anger I didn’t even know he held towards me. All I could do was hang my head as he assailed me with the truth.

I always had this image of what my perfect woman would be: sexy with a body to die for, classy, smart, outgoing, someone I could brag about hanging on my arm. Chloe Childs seemed to embody all of my qualifications and then some. I was so happy to say she was mine. She was a like a shiny new toy I couldn't believe I was allowed to play with. Rhys' words weren’t falling on deaf ears this time. Chloe had broken my heart every time I let her get close to me, but as much as I hated her for how she treated me, deep down, I still wanted her to be that good woman.

Rhys sat back down on the bench. A couple of guys had walked into the locker room but headed towards the shower. For the time being, we were still alone.

“Look, Richie,” Rhys said in a calmer tone. “I’m not trying to come down on you, but you’re my boy and I’ll always have your back. I just don’t want you to mess up a good thing because you’re stuck in the past. I mean, look at me. I never paid Izzy any mind. All this time, I’ve been chasing behind women looking for that priceless gem when I had a diamond in the rough in my face for years. I’m going to divorce Tiffany. There’s no question about that. But look at what I had to go through. Look at all the time I wasted. Don’t be like me. Forget about Chloe and what you expected to have with her. Isabel cares about you. Man up and make her your priority.”

             

                                          *              *              *              *

 

              I sat in my car with my cell phone in my hand wondering if my day could be any more emotionally draining than it had already been. After Rhys told me about myself in the gym locker room, we cleaned up and went grabbed beer at Kelly's, an Irish pup not too far from my home.

There was no way I could stay mad at Rhys for blowing up at me. He was right in every sense. I was wrong. I should have known that he would never do or say anything to deliberately hurt me. He was my best friend, my ace. Even when we didn’t see eye to eye, we still respected each other. Whatever needed to be said, needed to be said. Simple as that.

We talked things over for about an hour or so, about his regret for marrying Tiffany whom he hadn’t seen her for a couple days and his ultimate regret for passing over Isabel. I finally owned up to my own shortcomings in the situation and assured Rhys that I was going to make it my business to make Isabel my lady and cut Chloe off for good.

After a round of beer and a much needed conversation, Rhys took off leaving me behind to make yet another phone call to Isabel. After hitting her speed dial number, I thought of what message I was going to leave, assuming the call would to go to voicemail. I was shocked when someone answered on the second ring and said, “Rich?”

“Tara?” I asked, confused. I double checked the number I dialed confirming that I had actually called the right person. Isabel’s cell number was displayed. “What are you doing with Isabel’s phone?”

Tara sounded hushed on the phone. “I’m holding her phone for her. We’re at Sentara Hospital in Hampton. Her mom’s been hurt.”

BOOK: What A Person Wants
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