Stick Dog Slurps Spaghetti (7 page)

Poo-Poo came close and put a paw on Stick Dog's shoulder. “Stick Dog, I swear,” he said, still giggling, “I don't think you even know what you're doing sometimes.”

Stick Dog laughed a little and shook his head at himself. It was then—and only then—that he looked all the way across the
parking lot toward the building on the other side.

There was a sign on the roof. It read, “Tip-Top Spaghetti.”

It was as clear, bright, and welcoming as the brightest star on the darkest night.

“It's here,” Stick Dog whispered. “It's here.”

“What's here?” Karen asked.

“The hot-air balloon?!” Mutt asked hopefully, and whipped his head up to scan the night sky.

“Does it have stripes?!” asked Stripes.

“No, not a balloon,” Stick Dog said. “We're already on the hilltop, remember? We don't need a balloon anymore.”

“Oh, right,” Mutt muttered. “I forgot.”

“I was talking about Tip-Top Spaghetti,” Stick Dog said, and pointed with his paw. “The restaurant is right over there.”

Well, this was all Mutt, Karen, Poo-Poo, and Stripes needed to hear. They had been so busy reveling in their hill-climbing accomplishment—and Stick Dog's unawareness of it—that they hadn't even noticed the building. As soon as they turned their heads and peered across the parking lot to see Tip-Top Spaghetti, their stomachs began to grumble.

A slight breeze blew the aroma of rich, thick tomato sauce toward them. They began to drool. They fidgeted nervously as they remembered the delectable spaghetti slurping they had done behind the hardware store. There was no more talk of hot-air balloons, giant skillets, and bonfires.

Now, there was only one thing on their minds—and stomachs.

It was the delicious prospect of more spaghetti.

Stick Dog put his forepaws up on the guardrail, and the others copied his action. Well, everybody except Karen. She couldn't quite reach—but she did duck her head under the guardrail to search the area the best she could. There were several cars in the parking lot, but no humans that they could see. The restaurant itself had a large window in the front next to a fancy wooden door. Thankfully, there was a row of rhododendron bushes in front of the window. They were huge and would conceal the dogs easily, Stick Dog thought.

“Let's get to those bushes,” Stick Dog said. “We'll take a peek in that big window, see what's inside, and maybe we'll get a spaghetti-snatching idea.”

Everyone agreed this was a good plan.

They moved across the parking lot in spurts and starts. In just a couple of minutes, they dove safely beneath the bushes by the window. The dogs scooted on their bellies until they were directly under the window.

“Careful now,” Stick Dog whispered. “We'll just peek over the bottom edge and see what's inside.”

What they saw made them even hungrier. At table after table throughout the restaurant,
humans sucked and slurped on giant bowls of spaghetti.

“Humans are so strange,” Poo-Poo whispered, and stared.

“Why?” Mutt whispered back.

“Shh,” Stick Dog said. “Everybody down. Back under the bushes.”

Once they were gathered and hidden safely among the branches and brambles, Poo-Poo answered Mutt's question.

“It's just weird the way humans eat, that's all,” he said. “It makes no sense.”

“How so?” asked Stripes.

They were all interested in Poo-Poo's opinion. And while there wasn't a whole lot of room beneath the rhododendron bushes, there was enough to gather awkwardly close to Poo-Poo to listen. That's what Mutt, Karen, and Stripes did. Stick Dog, however, moved stealthily about, poking his head in and out of the bushes in different areas, trying to gather as much information as he could.

“Think about it,” Poo-Poo went on. “First they push those metal things into their mouths. One has prongs on the end, and the other has a little circle.”

“I think those are called forks and spoons,” Stick Dog said as he passed on his way to another lookout spot.

“Whatever they're called, it's gross,” continued Poo-Poo. “Why would you put metal in your mouth. On purpose?!”

“Humans do put metal in their mouths, it's true,” said Karen. She seemed to be thinking of things she'd seen in the past. “Not just forks and spoons either. I've seen humans—usually smaller humans—who have metal wires all over their teeth. It's like they're in there permanently or something. So strange.”

“And did you see how far away the food was from them?” Poo-Poo asked. He seemed to be slightly agitated. It was like he was offended by the way humans ate or something. “That's the way they always eat. They put the food far away on a table, then they stab it with one of those so-called forks or spoons, then they bring it up to their mouths, and it disappears. It's bizarre, I tell you.”

“Why is that so bizarre?” asked Mutt.

“Because the food is only close to their noses for a split second, that's why,” answered Poo-Poo a little more loudly. He was getting a bit worked up.

“Shh,” Stick Dog said as he scooted by to look out of the bushes from another area.
“Lower your voice, please.”

Poo-Poo continued in a whisper. “Half the fun of eating is smelling. Everybody knows that. But humans never use their noses during eating. The way we do it is so much smarter and so much more satisfying. Our noses are shoved right into the food as we eat. We
combine
the smelling and chewing experience into one all-encompassing super-sensory eating extravaganza.”

“That's right; we do!” exclaimed Mutt.

Poo-Poo closed his eyes a little and lifted his chin ever so slightly. He said, “It's just one more reason why we are more advanced than humans.”

They were impressed with Poo-Poo's observations. Stripes spoke for them all when she said, “You make a lot of really good points.”

“There's one more thing too,” Poo-Poo said. He wasn't quite done.

“What is it?” asked Karen.

“You're not going to believe it.”

“What?!”

“Shh,” Stick Dog repeated. “A little quieter, please.”

“When they're done chewing and swallowing, they do the worst thing imaginable,” Poo-Poo answered. He paused for a dramatic second or two. Then he said, “They wipe a cloth across their mouth to clean up the extra food.”