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Authors: Jennifer Ashley

Tags: #Highland, #Historical Romance, #Love Story, #Regency Romance, #Romance, #Regency England, #Regency Scotland

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Chapter Nine

Beth was delighted with the ruse. In an elegant box that belonged to the Duke of Kilmorgan, she clasped her hands and laughed at Steven’s tale of meeting Rose and his decision to begin the pretense. Rose listened with some trepidation, but Beth appeared to find nothing wrong with their behavior.

“Marvelous,” Beth said. “That stopped a few wagging tongues, I imagine.”

“Now they’re wagging about this betrothal,” Rose said. “Wagging very hard, it seems. Steven wouldn’t bring a newspaper upstairs today.”

“I didn’t want you worrying, Rosie.” Steven laced his fingers through Rose’s. “You have enough to think on already.”

Beth watched him kiss Rose’s fingers and raised her brows. “Are you certain it’s only a ruse?”

Steven winked at her. “For now.” Rose tried to pretend it was all part of the game, but her face went hot.

Ian appeared to have lost interest in the entire conversation. His attention was fixed now on a silk ribbon attached to Beth’s sleeve, which he’d untied from its ornamental bow. Now he wrapped one end around his large finger, rubbed his thumb over it, unwound it, and started the process over again. He sat very close to Beth, his thigh overlapping into her chair as he continued to caress her ribbon.

He was an unusual man, certainly. Odd, even. But watching him, Rose saw how gentle he was with Beth, and how he couldn’t stay far from her. He liked watching her too, his gaze softening when she smiled at him, while with Steven and Rose he was still a bit stiff. Shy, Rose thought, though this seemed more than simple shyness.

Beth possessed an openness her husband lacked. She engaged Rose in conversation without stiltedness, neither awed by the fact that Rose was a duchess or put off by the rumors about her. Beth spoke to Rose as though they were already friends, and Rose, for the first time in years, had an enjoyable evening.

Rose now understood Steven’s insistence that they watch the play with the Mackenzies from this box. Plenty of lorgnettes and opera glasses trained on them from other boxes and the stalls below, and plenty of heads moved together to discuss it. No one paid much attention to the play. But this box belonged to Hart Mackenzie, Duke of Kilmorgan, Lord Ian’s brother. None of the staring people would accost them here.

When the drama onstage was over, and they all rose to leave, Steven suggested they all go to the Albion for a light meal before they retired. Ian said absolutely nothing, but annoyance flickered in his eyes.

He wanted to be alone with his wife, Rose saw. Sitting with a stranger and even with Steven had difficult for him, she understood. In any other man, Rose might take this for rudeness, but having watched him all evening, Rose saw that Ian’s oddities made him different, and he knew it. He tried to blend in, but he knew.

Rose saw too that Beth loved him. The little glances she’d given her husband to make sure he was all right and the secret looks they exchanged told Rose that theirs was a special bond indeed.

She couldn’t help wishing for one exactly like it.

“Perhaps not,” Rose said, while Steven waited for Beth’s answer. “I am rather tired. It’s been a wonderful evening, but we had a long day, and I’m weary.”

Steven took her hand and stepped against her, looking down into her eyes. “Of course, love.”

For a single moment, as Steven’s gray gaze fixed on her and her alone, nothing else existed. The noise of the emptying theatre went away, the draft that came into the box as a footman held open the door, Beth’s low voice as she spoke to Ian. Only Steven filled Rose’s world, his smile, the warmth in his eyes, his voice wrapping around her as he said,
Of course, love.

She wanted to save the moment, and never let it go.

Then Steven kissed her hand, released it, and turned to fetch her coat.

As they exited the box, Steven and Beth talking easily again, Ian moved in front of Rose and stopped, facing her. His tall body filled the doorway, blocking her way out. As Rose started to politely ask him to let her pass, Ian leaned to her, pitching his voice low.

“He needs it to be real.”

Rose blinked. “I beg your pardon?”

Ian waited for a few seconds of silence, as though thinking through his words. “He needs it to be real,” he repeated slowly. “With you.”

The words were simple, yet something caught in Rose’s heart. She cleared her throat. “Captain McBride is helping me. That is all.”

Ian shook his head, his brows lowering. “No. You are helping
him
.”

He turned away, moving to where Beth and Steven waited in the hall. Steven gave Rose an inquiring look, but Ian turned to Beth, the rest of the world forgotten as he absorbed himself in her.

***

Rose pondered what Ian had said on the silent ride back to the hotel. Steven said little, his laughter gone as he looked moodily out the window to the dark night.

He needs it to be real.

Needed what to be real? The betrothal? The affection Rose was developing for him?
More than affection . . .

Steven McBride did not need her. He was a good-natured, attractive, entertainment-seeking bachelor who liked to play cards and imbibe a little too much—although he’d been quite moderate in his drink tonight. He came from a respectable Scottish family and had highborn friends and connections like the Mackenzies. His fellow officers apparently thought well of him. Why would Steven need a betrothal to a scandalous woman like Rose?

She had no idea, and no idea why Steven became moodier and more abrupt when they reached the hotel. It was late enough that not many people were about, but couples in evening finery still watched as the two of them ascended the stairs together.

Outside their suites of rooms, Rose started to say good night, but Steven stopped and tugged her hand out of the crook of his arm.

“I can’t do it, Rosie.”

Rose faced him, raising her brows to hide the rapid beating of her heart. “Can’t do what?”

“Stay here and go tamely to bed, knowing you’re—”

He broke off, took her key from her and unlocked her door. He opened it and guided her inside, hand on his elbow. The parlor of Rose’s suite was still lit, a coal fire dancing on the hearth in anticipation of her return.

“Knowing I’m what?” Rose asked.

Steven closed the door. “Knowing you’re in here.” The words were almost a snarl. “On the other side of the wall, while I try to be a gentleman and stay away from you.” He cupped her cheek with his warm hand. “It’s too damned hard.”

It was hard for Rose too. She touched his fingers. “The world already thinks it, Steven,” she said softly, hearing the tremble in the words. “In spite of our separate rooms. You know they do.”

Heat flared in Steven’s eyes, then his look turned self-deprecating. “I’m trying to help you win back your good name, not tarnish it more.” He laced his fingers through hers and lifted her hand to his lips. “I can’t stay in the hotel, lass. I’ll never sleep if I do, and I have an appointment to keep tomorrow. I’ll be back in time for breakfast.”

Rose gripped his hand when he tried to withdraw it. “Don’t.”

“No choice, love.” Steven kissed the tip of her nose but held himself stiffly away from her. “Good night.”

“Good night,” Rose said faintly, letting him go.

She watched him move across the room, taking up the hat he’d dropped to a table. “Steven,” she called.

He turned back at the door, impatient to be away.

“Be careful,” Rose said. “You’ve been . . . ill the last two mornings . . .”

“From overindulging?” His smile was wry. “Don’t worry, love. The appointment tomorrow is too important for me to arrive hungover. Sweet dreams.” Steven swung away and said nothing more as he disappeared out the door.

An important appointment with a grieving widow. Whoever she might be.

Steven had dropped the silk scarf he’d worn tonight around his neck. Rose lifted it, debated running after him with it, then lifted it to her lips instead. The soft fabric still held his warmth, but it didn’t ease the ache in Rose’s heart.

***

Steven was packing up the effects of one Captain Ronald Ellis when Rose tapped on the door of Steven’s parlor and entered to his grunted, “Come in.”

Rose stopped in surprise upon seeing the valise and the red uniform being laid inside. “Gracious, are you leaving?”

The note in her voice was one of dismay and alarm, which warmed Steven’s heart unexpectedly. She hadn’t asked with polite disinterest but with worry that he was going.

Steven smoothed out the uniform. “This isn’t mine. I’m taking it to the widowed Mrs. Ellis.”

“Oh.” He saw Rose readjust her thoughts. “The woman who tried to call on you yesterday?”

“The very one.”

Rose came to him and studied the pile inside the valise then reached in and started pulling things out to refold. Steven relinquished the task to her. As a soldier, he’d learned to pack efficiently, but the ability had deserted him this morning.

“Why does she not wish you to come?” Rose asked, shaking out and folding the red uniform coat. “I would think she’d want her husband’s things returned.”

“She wants the things,” Steven said. “Not me.” He let out a breath. “But I need to go. To finish this.”

Steven had no wish to face Laura Ellis this morning, but he owed it to Ronald. Laura would hate him, and that was fine. He’d go to her, let her take out her grief on him, and that would be all. He’d promised Ronald.

Rose was watching him out of the corner of her eye as she packed. She had no idea what this was all about, but she wasn’t impatient or demanding him to explain. Steven folded his arms and let her warmth drift over him, closing his eyes to it. He wasn’t hungover this morning, but somehow he’d prefer a pounding headache and brassy throat to the remorse in his heart.

“Would you like me to go with you?” Rose was asking.

Steven popped his eyes open. “There’s no need . . .” He trailed off. Rose’s eyes were full of compassion, a softness for Steven. She’d had that even the first night he’d met her and fallen so cravenly into her bosom.

“Yes,” he said. “Please. Come with me, Rosie.”

***

Ellis had inherited a house north of Oxford Street, near Cavendish Square. Rose had asked Miles her former coachman to drive them, saying that such an errand should not be made in a hired hack. If Albert found out, he’d have to lump it, she said decidedly. Steven was torn between laughter at her resolve and dread of his errand.

Rain had started coming down in earnest. The London streets were soaked, mist rising from the pavements. Miles drove slowly, the streets slippery, but all too soon, he pulled up in front of the house in Mortimer Street.

Steven had dressed in his regimentals for this errand, and rain fell on his bare head as he descended. Rose started to come out after him, but Steven forestalled her.

“No need for that. You stay cozy in here.” He took the valise she handed him and gave her hand a caress. “Knowing you’re out here waiting for me will be enough to sustain me.”

“Please give Mrs. Ellis my condolences,” Rose said. “I know how difficult this is for her.”

Because Rose herself had lost a beloved husband, she meant. But she didn’t understand the half of it, unfortunately. “Thanks, love. Stay warm, now.”

Steven squared his shoulders, hefted the valise, stepped to the door, and knocked upon it.

***

“Steven.” Laura rose from where she sat at a writing table as her maid admitted him. The maid had tried to tell him that Mrs. Ellis wasn’t receiving, but Steven overrode her. “I asked for you not to come.”

“I know.” Steven set the valise on a table and opened it. “But I know you’d regret ever after if I didn’t. Here it is.”

Laura stared at the valise as though it held a snake. She took one step, two, and peered inside.

“He wanted you to have it,” Steven said, gentling his voice. “I couldn’t not bring it.”

Laura ran her hand over the uniform coat inside, fingers catching on the buttons and braid. Her shoulders sagged.

“And this.” Steven removed a locket and chain from his pocket and pressed it into her hands.

Laura stared down at it, anguish on her face. “What do we do now? Tell me, Steven. What do I do?”

“We remember him. And honor him.”

“Yes. Yes, I . . .” Her voice broke, and as Steven had feared, Laura burst into sobs. “I can’t. I loved him. I’ll never, ever love anyone like that again.”

Her cries were heartbreaking. She rushed at Steven, reaching for him, needing him.

Steven had come here intending to be firm with her, even callous if he needed to be, but he saw now that Laura was truly suffering. He pulled her into his arms, and Laura clung to him, weeping into his shoulder.

The weeping was more than grief, Steven knew. It was guilt for her part in the affair, guilt at cuckolding Steven, fear that she’d driven Ronald to his death. Steven carried his own share of guilt.

The door of the room creaked open, and a breath of air entered the stifling room. “Is everything all right?” Rose asked in her voice like soothing rain. “Can I help?”

Chapter Ten

Rose paused on the threshold, torn between pity and jealousy as the woman continued to cry on Steven’s shoulder. She reminded herself she had no right to be jealous, but emotions like that had no sense of their own.

Rose had fully intended to remain in the carriage and let Steven attend to his own business. But she’d been able to see, though the parlor windows, Steven speaking to the widowed Mrs. Ellis, and Mrs. Ellis hurtling herself at Steven. Steven had started in surprise, and by the look on his face had no idea what to do with her. Rose had called for the footman who’d accompanied them and bade him help her from the carriage and to the house.

The woman—Mrs. Ellis—raised her head when she heard Rose’s voice. Her eyes were red-rimmed with weeping, her face blotchy. She wrenched herself away from Steven as though Steven had been clutching her instead of the other way around, and dragged a handkerchief from her pocket.

“Why did you bring
her
here?” Mrs. Ellis asked piteously. “How could you, Steven?”

Steven’s face was flushed, and he balled his gloved hands to fists and cleared his throat. “May I present Her Grace, the Dowager Duchess of Southdown?” he said stiffly. “My fiancée.”

“What?” Mrs. Ellis raised her head, her voice ragged. “Fiancée? What are you talking about?”

Steven continued to stand rigidly. “If you’d bothered to look at a newspaper the last few days, you’d have seen it splashed everywhere.”

Mrs. Ellis stared at him a moment, then she swung her gaze to the maid who’d followed Rose into the parlor, trying to stop her. “Evans,” she snapped. “Fetch me a newspaper.”

The maid curtseyed then vanished without a word. She was back quickly, newspapers in her hand. She handed one to Mrs. Ellis, face-up to the place that said,
Captain S— McB— and his tenacious duchess dine together, then head for the theatre with his illustrious McK— in-laws. The play in question was
Medea
. One hopes it is not prophetic.

Mrs. Ellis read this, her color changing from red to unhealthy pale. “Oh.” She looked up, not at Rose, but at Steven, and her expression was one of chagrin but also relief—vast relief. How odd. “Steven, forgive me. I had no idea.” She turned to Rose and flushed again. “I’m so sorry, Your Grace.” She sank down to the sofa, the spirit gone out of her.

Rose sat next to her in concern. “Are you all right? Evans, please bring your mistress tea.”

Evans hurried to obey while Steven stood in the center of the room, a masculine pillar in the midst of feminine hysteria.

“Steven, you should have told me,” Mrs. Ellis said, looking up at him, her handkerchief at her eyes again. “I never would have . . .”

“Forget it,” Steven said in a firm voice. “It’s done.”

The tension between them was thick. Rose wished she knew what was going on, but she realized that now was not the time to ask.

“Congratulations.” Mrs. Ellis directed the word first at Steven then at Rose. “I hope you will be happy. I truly do.”

“I intend to be,” Steven answered.

The look he sent Rose seemed to erase all doubt in Mrs. Ellis’s mind. She turned a genuine smile on Rose. “My sincerest apologies, Your Grace. Steven was right—I knew nothing, and only assumed. I think this is wonderful. The best thing that could happen. You’ve brightened my day a bit.” She squeezed Rose’s hand, and Rose smiled back, more to reassure her than anything else.

The tea came. Rose poured a cup for Mrs. Ellis and pushed it into her hand but declined any herself.

“We have much to do,” Rose said, rising. “Everything is very rushed, unfortunately.” She took Mrs. Ellis’s hand. “Again, I am very sorry to hear about your husband. I know well what it is to lose one so dear. We will never cease missing them, but it does become more bearable. But we wouldn’t want to lose the pain entirely, would we? Then it would be as if they hadn’t mattered.”

Mrs. Ellis nodded, tears filling her eyes again. “You are right. Entirely right.” She set aside her tea and got to her feet, becoming again the polite woman Rose had met the day before. “Take care of Steven, Your Grace. He deserves happiness.”

She squeezed Rose’s hands then let her go. Steven was beside Rose now, his hand on her elbow. “Good-bye, Laura,” he said firmly, and steered Rose out.

***

Not until they were in the carriage, moving through the streets toward the Langham did Rose venture to speak.

“If you don’t wish to talk of it, I understand,” she said to Steven, who’d taken the seat opposite her. “But I admit a healthy curiosity.”

Steven had been silent since they’d left the house, but he now held out a hand to Rose. “Come and sit with me.”

He was asking her to throw propriety to the wind. Ladies and gentlemen who were not related did not occupy the same seat in a carriage, and the ladies always rode facing forward while the gentlemen faced the rear of the coach.

The little rules seemed ridiculous now that they’d broken so many larger ones. Rose didn’t hesitate to go to Steven and snuggle in next to him. She laid her cheek on his warm coat, and he slid his arm around her as rain streaked the carriage windows like tears.

“My friend Ronald and I first met Laura five years ago, when we were on leave for Christmas,” Steven began. “And we both fell hard. She was twenty-two and a stunning beauty.”

“She is still quite pretty,” Rose managed to say. The bite of jealousy rose up in her again, but she would run back to the hotel alone in the rain before she’d admit it.

Steven touched her cheek. “You’re a generous soul, Rosie. Ronald and I made great fools of ourselves for her. We were best friends, closer than most brothers, and I think we enjoyed the game for her affections. She certainly enjoyed playing us one off the other. She had us fighting for her favors, each trying to trick the other out of escorting her to whatever outings we’d planned. We both went a little mad, threatening each other with dire fates. Laura sat between us and lapped up every morsel of it. I postured as much as Ronald, even coming to blows with him, but somewhere in the back of my mind, no matter how far things went, I still considered it all a game. After Christmas, we’d rejoin the regiment as best friends.” Steven drew a sharp breath. “When Laura chose me as her affianced, I was very proud of myself. What I didn’t realize at the time was that Ronald hated me for it.”

“Oh.” Rose’s heart squeezed, and she fought her demon again. No reason for it, she told herself. Clearly the marriage had not come to pass. “But she married Captain Ellis,” she said, puzzled.

Steven gave her a nod. “That came later, after I squired Laura about for the rest of that season, very full of myself. She quite played it up as well. What neither she nor I knew was how much Ronald felt it. I had no idea—I was only pleased I’d won the game. I play to win.” He let out a breath, sounding bitter. “One night, Ronald cornered me alone in my hotel room. He had a pistol and vowed to shoot me, then himself.”

Rose sat up in alarm. “Good heavens. What did you do?”

“He was very drunk, and I was able to wrestled the pistol away from him, thank God. But I saw the misery in his eyes. I realized in that single moment that Ronald loved Laura deeply, and I never had. I’d been infatuated, and wanted to best everybody, as I always do. I’d been gambling as usual, but this time with friendship and our lives.”

Rose rubbed her thumb over the inside his wrist. “Oh, Steven. I’m sorry.”

Steven sent her a self-deprecating smile. “No need. I’d been a thorough idiot, and the shock of Ronald truly wanting to kill me woke me up. So I conceded the field. I told Ronald I knew he and Laura belonged together. I’d allow her to break the engagement, then I left for Scotland, taking myself out of the way.”

“What did Mrs. Ellis say to that?” Rose tried to imagine the grief-stricken woman she’d met devastated that Steven wanted to break the engagement. No, she’d truly loved her husband. Her sorrow hadn’t been feigned, and she hadn’t looked at Steven with regret or any sort of longing.

Steven gave a short laugh. “She’d wanted Ronald the whole time, it turned out. Used me to make him declare himself. I doubt she thought he’d go as dramatically far as he did. I walked away, spent my Christmas with my family in Scotland, as per usual, and went back to the regiment. Ronald returned too, by himself, but a married man. He’d obtained a special license and done the deed at New Year’s.”

“Mrs. Ellis didn’t accompany him?”

He shook his head. “She didn’t like the idea of living outside England, especially not in such a difficult place as Africa. Which was why I’d never had any fear of taking the game to its logical conclusion. I’d have gotten out of the engagement before it became too entangling. I’d want a wife willing to accompany me.”

Rose secretly thought Mrs. Ellis a fool. If Steven had asked
her
, Rose would have eagerly followed him wherever he went, never mind heat and hardship.

“What happened to Captain Ellis?” Rose asked.

Steven looked out the window, but there was nothing to see but drops on the glass and mist beyond. Very little sunshine penetrated the gloom of the day, sealing them in a half-light of gray.

Rose rested her head on his shoulder again. “If you don’t want to tell me the rest, I understand.”

Steven drew a long breath. “No, I want you to know the rest of the story. Ronald and I were on a patrol one night a month or so ago, and got cut off from camp. He’d told me that morning that when he took leave this year, it would be his last. He planned to leave the army and settle down with Laura and raise children. He was happy, and I was happy for him. Things had never been the same between us since he tried to shoot me, no matter how many times he’d apologized for it or tried to make up for it. I was glad we were putting the whole sordid business behind us. But it wasn’t meant to be.” Steven turned from the window and looked down at her. “We ran into a pocket of rebels, they had guns, and they shot Ronald, right in front of me.”

“Steven.” Rose slid her arms around him, her heart aching. “How horrible.”

“He never had a chance,” he said, voice stoic. “I got him away and to a safe place, but he died as I held him.”

Rose tightened her embrace. It felt so natural to comfort him, as though she had a right to. “I’m so sorry.”

“His last words to me were another apology.” Steven gave another short laugh. “Ronald thought I was still in love with Laura, to my surprise. He told me to go back to England and look after her. Gave me his blessing to marry her. I couldn’t argue with him, not while he was dying. It was important to him that he made his peace with me this way, so I agreed to take care of her.”

Rose said nothing. Steven turned back to the window, the rain increasing outside. Rose thought about how Steven had introduced her to Mrs. Ellis, emphasizing she was his fiancée. And Mrs. Ellis’s look of relief.

“She doesn’t want to marry you,” Rose said. “Is that what she thought you’d come to do? Propose to her?”

“Yes,” Steven answered wearily. “Ronald apparently told her that if anything ever happened to him, she and I could be together. But Laura never wanted me. She still doesn’t. That’s why she tried to put me off. I only insisted delivering Ronald’s things so I could fulfill my promise to him, and close the matter.”

“I understand.” Rose rested her hand on the seat beside her. “Handy that the world thought you betrothed then, wasn’t it?”

She spoke lightly, but she at last understood Steven’s willingness to have his name coupled with hers, to have the journalists spread the tale that they were engaged. It would send a message to Mrs. Ellis for once and for all that the events of the past were at an end.

“Rose.” Steven turned to her, a hard light in his eyes. “I might have seen the opportunity, that first morning. But that’s not what it became.”

His look made anything jealous in her shrivel in shame. “I’m not angry,” she said, her voice quiet. “I am happy to help you in return for the assistance you’ve rendered me.” She tried to smile. “Even to keep you out of an unwanted marriage.”

“Not to keep me out—to give Laura her freedom. I know her. She’d convinced herself I was still in love with her, and that it was her duty to marry me for Ronald’s sake. Even if I hadn’t proposed, she’d have martyred herself, waiting for me to so. This way, she can move on with her life, marry someone else if she wishes, instead of either burying herself for me or marrying me and both of us living in horrible guilt. Now she’s free.”

Rose nodded. “I do see that.” She thought of her first encounter with Mrs. Ellis and became torn between amusement and embarrassment. “I suppose she thought I was your paramour.”

Steven leaned back against the seat. “At this moment, I don’t give a damn what she thought. I’ve done my part, now we can all rest in peace.”

Before Rose could ask him what he meant by that, the coach slowed, nearing the hotel. The street was crowed, despite the rain, and men in black suits waited near the hotel’s entrance for their return.

“Oh, God,” Steven said, peering out at them. “I can’t face that mob right now. Miles!” he called.

Miles opened the hatch below his seat and peered inside. “Yes, sir?”

“Can you take us somewhere a little less conspicuous?”

“Yes, sir.” Miles snapped closed the hatch and the carriage turned abruptly. In the mist and rain, perhaps the journalists would not see the crest of the Duke of Southdown on the coach’s side.

Miles drove them back to Mayfair, to Grosvenor Street and the mews behind it. He was going to lend them his quarters above the coach house again, Rose saw.

The rain was coming down in earnest as Miles halted the coach. Steven pulled a flap of his greatcoat around Rose as he helped her down, then they dashed together into the warm, horse-scented coach house. A side door took them to a flight of stairs leading to the quarters above, where Mrs. Miles greeted them with tea.

Mrs. Miles helped Steven out of his wet coat, telling him she’d sent hot water up to the spare room he’d used before, if he wanted to wash his face and hands. She chivvied him on up the stairs, then brought a basin and towel to Rose.

Rose rinsed her face and patted it dry, blessing Mrs. Miles for her understanding. It was cozy here, in the small quarters where only Miles and his wife lived. Albert kept no other staff permanently in Town; he employed Miles only because he was paid by a trust settled upon him by Charles. Miles and his wife stayed for Rose’s sake, they’d let her know early on, and she was grateful to the pair of them.

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