Sabrina (Big Sky Dreams 2) (10 page)

85Sabrina read quickly until she got to the last paragraph, the one where Callie told her what God had been teaching her.

[ Lately I've been looking at Genesis and marveling at God as Creator. This is not a new topic for me, but my thoughts have been new. When I am tempted to hide from God because of my sin or some flaw. I have to remember that He knows all. He's the Creator. I don't know why it's taken me this long to see it in that light. I can read that He created everything, but I forget how personal that is. He created Collie Barshaw and knows every part of her frame. He made her compassionate and sensitive, and He also knows she wants to have her own way. He sees what's good about her and can stay and what has to be trained out.

The peace I feel about this new realization has freed me to go to God in a new way. I have long prayed in repentance, but this is new. Now I'm praying with such respect for who God is but with none of the fear of being -found out." I praise Him for continuing to train me because I need it so much.

86 Callie closed the letter soon after this, urging Sabrina to write again. Sabrina folded the letter and put it in the pocket of her apron, but for a moment that was all the more she was capable of. She was in the same boat as Callie, seeing God as Creator but not in a personal light. It was going to take some thought. There were still parts of her heart that she thought were secret. In her mind she knew that God knew all, but her heart was not fully convinced.

Jessie had not needed her this Tuesday as things at the mercantile had been very slow, but she'd still gone and checked for mail and then sat in the rocking chair on the wide boardwalk out front to read the letter. This was where Hannah found her.

"Hi, Bri."

"Hello, Hannah," Sabrina greeted quietly, still thinking about Callie's words and how personal they were to everyone. God was the Creator of each of them.

"What are you doing?"

"I just read a letter from a friend. What are you doing today?" "I might get to play with Heidi."

"Heidi Vick?"

"Do you know Heidi?"

"Yes. I had dinner at Heidi's house on Sunday."

"They have a baby," Hannah told Sabrina, though she already knew, "and a dog."

"Isn't that fun?"

"Clancy used to be a baby, but not anymore."

"You're both big girls these days," Sabrina said, and without warning a memory of her sister came flooding back. They had been about the same distance apart in age, and Sabrina would have been the Clancy of the two.

"Are you sad?" Hannah asked suddenly, and Sabrina thought she was much too aware for her age.

Before Sabrina could answer, Rylan had come up the step and joined them. Neither female watched him approach, but Sabrina saw in a moment that he and Hannah were old friends.

87 "Pastor Rylan," Hannah said, running to take his hand, "I might get to play with Heidi today!"

"That sounds fun. Do I get to come?"

"No," Hannah answered, looking truly regretful about this. "You're too big."

"I could get on my knees," Rylan suggested, his eyes exaggerated.

"No," Hannah said, but she was laughing. "We play dolls. Boys don't like dolls. Franklin never does," Hannah added, referring to the oldest of the Vick children.

Rylan's free hand came out and he gently cupped her cheek before turning to Sabina.

"How is that lock working?"

"Very well, thank you."

"Good."

"Do you need to shop?" Hannah snagged Rylan's attention again.

"I just need a few things," Rylan answered, but then turned right back to Sabrina.

"Not working today?"

"It's slow, so Jessie gave me the day off. Oh, and thank you for the skirt money. Jeanette is making me a new one this week."

"I'm glad," Rylan said, but then a teasing light entered his eyes. "Does she have enough fabric?"

Sabrina laughed but didn't answer, and Hannah took Rylan by the hand again and led him inside. Sabrina had not forgotten about the verse this time but wasn't sure if she should ask him or not. She wrestled with the idea as she walked back to her apartment but never did come up with an answer.

"We can fish," Clancy told Sabrina later that day.

Hannah had gone to the Vicks. Sabrina had written back to Callie,

88 and after doing some laundry that she hung around her apartment, had taken pity on Jessie and invited Clancy to spend the afternoon with her. They had seen Sabrina's apartment, walked to Jeanette's, and were now strolling along the creek.

"I don't know how to fish."

"You don't?"

"No, I'm sorry."

"Mama knows how to fish, but she has to work the store."

Sabrina thought it would be nice if she could take Jessie's place, but there was still enough she didn't know about the mercantile to make that impossible.

"Oh, look," Clancy said. "It's Mr. Vick and Pastor Rylan."

"Wait, Clancy," Sabrina called to her, but the child had darted ahead. Sabrina picked up the pace, sure they were interrupting and feeling especially so when both men came to their feet. They both had their Bibles on the grass, and Sabrina felt more than a little awkward.

"And Hannah got to play with Heidi at her house, but I couldn't go," Clancy was saying when Sabrina came up. "Bri can't fish, but we still looked at the water."

"I'm sorry we disturbed you," Sabrina began, but the men were having none of it.

"You can't fish?" Chas said, sounding sad. "I didn't know that when I invited you to dinner. This changes everything."

"Not to mention Sunday morning," Rylan added. "Everyone will have to be told."

Sabrina began to laugh, but Clancy was not catching the sarcasm.

"Mama could teach you," the little girl offered, and the adults sobered.

"That would be very fun," Sabrina said to her, "but you need to understand that Pastor Rylan and Mr. Vick were only teasing me."

Sabrina took the moment to glance at Rylan, and because Clancy

89 wasn't looking at him, he was still tragically shaking his head. Sabrina put a hand to her mouth, but a small laugh still escaped.

"I think we'll keep walking," Sabrina suggested, reaching for the little girl's hand. "Goodbye," she said, not wasting any time.

"You're taller than Mr. Vick," Clancy stated once the men had said goodbye.

"Do you think so?"

"But not taller than Pastor Rylan. No one is taller than Pastor Rylan."

The men watched them move on their way for just a few minutes, the words floating back to them. They sat down again on the grassy area where they met during the summer.

"How did dinner go on Sunday?" Rylan asked the other elder. "It went well. Miranda asked her about her church family in

Denver, and it sounds like her faith is real. New, but real." "Did she say why she left Denver?"

"Yes, she said that city is full of hard memories for her, and one of her friends suggested the church family here."

Once again Rylan thought about what a long way it was to move and then wondered what type of life someone as young as Sabrina would wish to leave. Thoughts of someone mistreating her, possibly a family member, came to mind. It bothered him no small amount, and he had to remind himself that he knew none of the facts.

"She's certainly hardworking," Chas said next. "And pretty." Rylan laughed. "You're impossible, do you know that?"

"Well, you let Cassidy get away, and you're not getting any

younger."

"I wasn't the least bit in love with Cassidy, and you know it." Chas let it go, but Rylan knew it would come up again. This was Chas, and lately that man had decided that Rylan needed a wife.

90"You must be working at the dress shop today," Crystal said on Wednesday morning.

"Is that you, Crystal?" Sabrina spoke to the empty window until the woman's face appeared.

"Yeah."

"What did you say?"

"You must be working at the dress shop today."

"Why is that?"

"You never wear white to work at the mercantile."

"How do you know where I work?"

"I know lots of things."

Do you know God's Son died for you?
was the first thing that came to Sabrina's mind, but she didn't know if she could say that. She pictured Crystal retreating back inside and never speaking to her again.

As it was, Sabrina wasn't given time. Two men came around the corner, boards and tools in their hands.

"Right here," the one said, and Sabrina could see that they were headed for her stairs. "Come on."

"I'll be right there," the other man said, taking his time moving past the women as he checked them over. He finally stopped and spoke.

"Where are you going to be in a few hours?"

"Why?" Sabrina asked, her voice cold.

"We'll be getting paid for this job and the four of us can-" "How dare you!" Sabrina spat at him before he could finish. "Move along."

He was none too happy about the way she sent him off, and the words that came from his mouth brought Sabrina's chin up. He saw the anger in her eyes, however, and moved on his way.

"You shouldn't have done that," Crystal said in a voice that lacked conviction.

"What exactly?"

"Spoken for me."

91Sabrina leveled her with her eyes and said, "You need to want better for yourself."

Crystal didn't reply, and Sabrina was too upset to say more. She told the other woman she had to get to work and went on her way.

What was I thinking?
Sabrina railed at herself and God all the way to Jeanette's.
I take this apartment because it's cheap, and now my neighbor is a prostitute. She looks just like we all did, desperate and hungry. I can't handle this, Lord. I didn't even think ahead. I just heard the price of the rent and took it.

And she didn't want to hear what I had to say! She's probably trapped with nowhere to turn. I don't have the money to help her, and I certainly can't promise her that she can find other work! Token Creek is so much smaller than Denver. She might never escape that life in this little town.

By the time Sabrina reached Jeanette's shop, her color was high. At any other time, Jeanette would have noticed immediately, but the sewing machine was giving Jeanette trouble, and she had an errand for Sabrina.

"Please find Rylan. He should be at the livery today. Ask him to come when he can and check this for me. If you should happen to see Cassidy, Brad, or Trace, they also know what to do. I doubt if any of them are in town, but you never know."

Sabrina went back out the door, telling herself she had to put Crystal and the conversation with that man behind her. She had a job and a specific task to do at the moment.Noteven remembering to pray for Crystal, she simply tried to put the whole morning out of her mind.

"I think that will do it," Rylan spoke to Mr. Falcone from the bank. He had brought his horse in to be shod, and Rylan had just finished the job.

92"Thank you, Rylan. I paid a pretty penny for this girl, and I don't want her going lame."

"Well, she's certainly beautiful," Rylan said, stroking the mare's shoulder. He looked up in time to see Sabrina slip inside the wide doorway and stand out of the way. He would have headed that way, but Mr. Falcone was not done.

"Her left front fetlock seems a bit swollen to me. Did you notice anything?"

"I didn't. Is she favoring that leg?"

"I don't think so, but if you could check it."

Rylan easily lifted the hoof in his hands, and checked the area, but he found no swelling.

"I'm not seeing it, Mr. Falcone, but the Marling brothers would be the folks to ask. They're the experts in town when it comes to horses."

"Yes, I'll do that. Thank you, Rylan."

Rylan moved toward Sabrina as soon as Mr. Falcone left, but that woman had her back to him. She seemed to be studying something on the wall, and Rylan ended up standing with her, watching a spider at work.

Sabrina still hadn't realized that Mr. Falcone had left when she spotted iron hooks on the wall below the spider's web. Some were larger than others, and Sabrina took a small one from the nail it was hanging on and turned to find Rylan a few feet behind her.

"Do you sell these?"

"Yes. The large ones are six cents, and the one in your hand is three."

"How do you hang them?"

Rylan took it from her hand and showed her the top.

"You can loop this over a nail, or put the nail in first and then drive it in tight."

"Do you sell nails?"

"Well, I think if you buy a hook and need the nail, we just give you that."

93 Sabrina nodded thoughtfully, thinking about the spot in her kitchen where she could hang her pot. She had no place for it but the stove.

"Is that why you came in?" Rylan asked, fairly certain of the answer.