Redemption Road (Roughneck #3) (3 page)

Chapter 4

2:00 a.m.

The sound of my phone ringing woke me from my sleep. It took a second to realize where I was, and the pounding in my chest from being startled didn’t help any. Sam had let me crash on her couch for the night and I was so thankful, I felt safe for the first time in a long time. But I didn’t want to wake her, so I grabbed my phone and accepted the call before my eyes had a chance to adjust to the screen.

“You better get your ass home right now, Mackenzie,” Jake said calmly.

Damn it. Why didn’t I just decline the call?

“I’m not coming back, Jake,” I whispered, not wanting to make any noise.

“Oh yes, you are,” he hissed.

“No, I’m not. It’s over,” I said.

“Mackenzie, I’m sorry. Don’t do this,” he pleaded, but I wasn’t buying it. His apologies were meaningless. They were empty after so many of them.

“I can’t live like this anymore,” I said.

“I’ll do better, I’ll change,” he said.

“No, you won’t. It’s over,” I said, quietly.

“God Damn it, Mackenzie!” He screamed so loud I had to move the phone away from my ear.

“You’re not fucking leaving me! You got that!” he yelled.

“I’m hanging up now, Jake,” I said calmly.

“This isn’t over,” he said, and hung up the phone. The eerie silence on the other end of the line caused me to shutter. I knew he wouldn’t give up easily.

There was no way I was going back to sleep. I just laid on the couch listening for any little noise. The sound of the heater kicking on almost made me jump out of my skin. Why couldn’t he just let me go? Thank God Sam was going to let me stay at her dad’s house. Being so close to Kash would probably drive me insane, but it was a chance worth taking to stay away from Jake. But I knew that just because I was separated from Jake didn’t mean I could jump into bed with Kash. No matter how bad I wanted to. I wouldn’t be anyone’s bed buddy. And I sure wasn’t ready to get into a relationship with Kash, not that he was even the relationship type. Sam had made it pretty clear that he got around. I was just another notch on his bed post. Jake had used my body for sex for months, I wasn’t about to let Kash do the same thing. But living under the same roof as him was going to be hard. Being there while he showered, or got undressed at night. What if he slept naked? Naked, sleeping Kash. Damn it, maybe I should invest in a vibrator. I had never had one before. But I had a feeling it would be necessary, with Kash so close to me. I hadn’t even had an orgasm since Kash, anyway. I always faked it with Jake. I had tried a few times to do it myself, but always felt strange, as if I were doing something wrong, and just couldn’t finish. But according to Sam, her vibrator got her through the weeks that Moon was working. In her words, she couldn’t live without that speedy little mother fucker. My thoughts of Kash in the shower ran through my mind again. Dripping wet, all soaped up. Damn. Yeah, a vibrator was probably a purchase I was making in the near future. Surprisingly, thoughts of Kash relaxed my body enough for my eyes to get heavy. I looked at my phone; it was almost four in the morning. I had to get some sleep before work. I would be working on the new software and I needed to be coherent.

“Mackenzie,” I heard a whisper but my eyes wouldn’t open.

“Hey, sleepyhead,” I heard, as I felt a tap on my shoulder.

My eyes started to flutter open, and I saw Sam hovering over me. I jumped up quickly and almost head-butted her.

“Damn, girl,” Sam giggled, as she jumped back. “I didn’t mean to scare you.”

“Shit,” I whispered, as my heart was pounding out of my chest. “Sorry, I’m always kinda jumpy.”

“Ya think?” she said with a laugh, and then I saw a little sadness in her eyes.

“What time is it?” I asked.

“It’s only 6:45. I know you don’t have to be in until nine, but I wanted to give you this before I left,” she said, as she held up a key on a silver key ring with some sort of screw looking thing attached to it.

“You talked to your dad?” I asked.

“Yep, he was totally fine with it. He said stay as long as you need. My old room still has all the furniture and everything you should need in there. I left most of my stuff when I moved in here. We didn’t want his stuff and my stuff, so we got all new stuff. Plus, I wasn’t going to move into a bachelor pad,” Sam said with a smile. I could tell she loved everything about Moon just by the way she looked when she talked about him. I wanted that kind of love one of these days.

“Thank you Sam,” I said, as I took the key out of her hand.

“No problem,” she said with a smile.

“Plus, Moon comes in late tonight, you probably don’t want to be anywhere near this house when he gets here,” she said with a raised eyebrow. “Because it’s on when he gets his fine ass in that door,” she said, as she nodded her head to the front door. I couldn’t help but laugh.

I ran the key through my fingers. My freedom. My way out of my own personally created hell. Finally. My eyes stared at the little rigged screw thing attached to the key ring.

“What’s this?” I asked, as I held it between my fingers.

“It’s a drill bit. Everyone in my family has one on their keys,” she said, as she held her keys up, and I noticed the same silver trinket hanging on her set.

“And you’re family now,” she said, as she grabbed her purse and headed to the front door.

“Thank you, Sam,” I repeated.

“There’s some coffee left. Bye, bitch,” she said, as she headed out the door.

Family. It had been so long since I had even considered myself part of any family. The thought of having one made tears well up in my eyes. I rubbed my eyes to bury the tears. I didn’t want to cry, no matter the reason. I was tired of tears.  So I got off the couch and headed to the coffee pot. It was a new day and I was starting a new life. Thank God. One where I could be happy and have some peace. I was ready for this new life.

Once I was ready for work, I gathered my suitcase and other stuff and headed to the front door. I locked the door behind me and stood on the front porch, taking in my surroundings before I took another step. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary, so I headed to my car.

I put my suitcase and bag in the backseat, and then opened the driver’s side door.

I looked in my front seat and noticed cotton everywhere. What the hell was that? Then I noticed in the floor board, next to the gas pedal, the stuffed bear that Jake had won me at the county fair. The front of the bear was sliced from top to bottom and there was a piece of paper sticking out of it. I didn’t want to pick it up. I looked around and didn’t see or hear anything. Damn these country roads; no neighbors, no witnesses. Shit. I grabbed the bear and the piece of paper that was sticking out.

It’s not over until I say it’s over.

Damn it. I wadded up the paper and started gathering the cotton that was everywhere. So much for peace. I knew Jake wasn’t going to let me go without a fight. This wasn’t going to be easy.

I took a final look around and started my car, then pulled out of the driveway, trying to keep my composure. The last thing I needed was Dr. Weston to think that I couldn’t handle the new task he was giving me. Damn it.

I did my very best to keep my mind off of Jake the entire day. I did a pretty good job, since I was so focused on the new software. But as the end of the day drew closer, my stomach started to get butterflies, and not the good kind. Dr. Weston stayed with me after the office closed so I could catch him up on some of the new files we would be using. I was thankful; I was too nervous to be here alone. Then I realized I would be alone tonight, at Joe’s house. Surely, Jake wouldn’t know I would be there and wouldn’t start any trouble. All I could do was hope.

“We better get out of here, my wife is cooking lasagna and I’m starving. This stuff will be waiting when we get here tomorrow,” he said, as he stood up and stretched.

“Ok, sounds good,” I said with a fake smile.

“It’s already dark out, want me to walk you out?” he asked, as he peeked out his office window.

“That’d be great, thanks,” I said casually, but on the inside I was sighing with relief. Jake would never approach me with Dr. Weston around.

“Just let me grab my stuff,” I said. I walked into the break room and grabbed my purse. I checked my phone while I dug for my keys.

27 missed calls from Jake. Twenty seven. But not one voice mail or text message, which was surprising. I put my phone in the front pocket of my scrubs and headed into the front office to meet Dr. Weston.

We walked out of the office and I scanned my surroundings without being too obvious.

“Thanks again for your help, Mackenzie,” he said.

“No, thanks for the opportunity, I really appreciate it,” I said with a wave, as I walked to my car.

“See you in the morning.” He waved back.

“Bye.” I smiled and took another look around.

I got in my car, double checked that the doors were locked, checked behind me in my mirrors, and then let out the breath I didn’t realize I was holding. I looked in the floor board of the passenger side and saw the pile of cotton I had gathered this morning. I felt like throwing up.

I felt my phone buzz in my pocket as I started the car and immediately got even more nauseous. I didn’t want to check my phone, but I did anyway.

It was Sam. Thank God.

Sam: Just a heads up, Kash is at the house. He will only be there a couple of days before he heads back out. But he’s been warned
.


Oh my God. Oh my God. Kash. I was about to see him. I was about to be in the same house with him, overnight. Oh my God. Ok. I could do this. I could do this. At least I wouldn’t be alone. My head was spinning. Get a grip, Mackenzie.

Me: Cool, no biggie. Thanks again!

I was so full of shit.

Chapter 5

I kept my eyes in my rearview mirror throughout most of my drive. I didn’t see Jake anywhere, so I was thankful. But I couldn’t shake the feeling in my gut that he was nearby. Maybe I was just being paranoid. I hoped anyway. I hated the way he messed with my head even when he wasn’t around. Thank God I was finally given a way out. Even if it took him punching me in the face to give me the courage to seek it out. Luckily no one at work noticed the bruise. The ice made most of the swelling go down, and it’s amazing what makeup will do to cover bruises and cuts. Dickhead. I really did hate him.

My breathing hitched when I spotted his car in the driveway. God, it was almost as sexy as he was. Almost. I can do this. I tried to pump myself up, or convince myself, whatever. I had to be strong. I couldn’t mess this up. If I slept with him again, things would get even more uncomfortable and I needed a place to stay. I would save every penny I could to get my own place, but I had to restrain myself from tackling him until then. My stomach started doing flip flops. Kash had that effect on me.

I put my car in park and took another look around. This little ritual was getting old. I just wanted to be normal. To be comfortable with my own life. This sucked. I still didn’t see any sign of Jake, so I got out of my car and grabbed my suitcase. I had to take a minute to slow my breathing before I walked up to the front porch. I don’t know why I should even be worried, he probably didn’t even want me. I was just a piece of ass to him; he got it and he was done. He probably just used me and wouldn’t give me a second thought. I’m sure he had plenty of women begging for a piece of him. The thought of that pissed me off a little, but I sure couldn’t blame them. There weren’t even words to describe what he did to me. And I know I wasn’t alone. He must have that effect on every woman he came in contact with. So I needed to get it out of my head that I would have to resist him. Because he probably wouldn’t even pursue me, he already had a piece. It’s not like I was some Barbie doll that men flocked to. Jake had me pretty convinced that no one else would ever want me anyway. He was probably right. Yep, I definitely hated him.

I walked up to the front porch and started to knock on the door. Do I knock? I had a key. Do I use it? I wasn’t sure what to do. I mean, I lived here now. I didn’t need to knock. Right? Shit. Why was I making such a big deal out of this? Use the key, Mackenzie. I rubbed it against my fingertips, trying to will myself to put it in the door knob. But it was too late for anymore debating when I noticed the door handle turn slowly. Shit.

“Hey, Mackenzie,” Kash said, as he opened the door slowly and stared at me, wearing a towel. His hair was messy and wet with beads of water dripping down his chest. His chest. That perfect, chiseled chest. Oh Lord, help me. I wanted to lick that water off his chest. And that little towel that was covering his bottom half. I tried not to notice that it was draped open a little at the end. I forced my eyes to look up; I wouldn’t let him catch me staring at him. But I couldn’t help but stare. He was so sexy. I watched as a small bead of water ran from his shoulder blade down his chest until it got lost in the small patch of hair below his belly button. Holy shit. Look up, Mackenzie, look up.

“You wanna come in?” Kash said in that husky voice that caused me to melt like butter. He ran his hands through his hair quickly causing it to stick up on all ends. I’m pretty sure I might have licked my lips just watching that simple gesture. He was giving me that cocky side grin that made my knees buckle.

I needed to get it together. Right now.

“Um. Yeah, thanks,” I said, as I picked my suitcase up and started to walk through the doorway. Kash grabbed the bag out of my hands.

“Thanks,” I whispered, staring at the floor, refusing to make eye contact with him.

I walked into the living room and took in my surroundings. It was clean and cozy. Besides the fact that Kash was basically naked less than a foot away from me, I was comfortable here. More than I thought I would be. I almost felt safe.

“Let me show you to your room,” Kash said, as he nodded his head down the hallway.

“Ok,” I said quietly. I walked behind him, trying not to stare at the towel swaying back and forth with each step. When I could finally take my eyes off his ass, I noticed a huge tattoo on his back. It was a huge cross with all of this weaving and design surrounding it. It covered almost his entire back. It was beautiful. And sexy as hell, which was no surprise.

“Here it is,” he said, as he opened the door and led me through the doorway. He put my suitcase on the bed and walked back to the doorway.

“Thanks for letting me stay here, Kash. I hope it isn’t a big inconvenience,” I said with a little smile, trying to keep it together.

“It’s my pleasure, sweetie,” he said, and gave me a wink before he shut the door behind him.

Once he shut the door, I had to sit on the bed before my knees gave out.

This was going to be harder than I thought. He was the hottest thing I’ve ever seen. There was no doubt about it. As I unpacked my clothes, I tried to get my butterflies in check. I heard my phone ringing in my scrubs pocket on the bed as I put a pair of yoga pants on. Jake, of course. I denied the call. Then a few seconds later, a text came through.

Jake: Answer my call, or you will regret it. I promise you.

Damn it. Why couldn’t he just leave me alone? But of course, my phone rang again a second later. I picked it up, because he had proven he was relentless.

“Hello,” I said quietly, but my voice was unable to disguise the hate I felt for him.

“So, you think you’re just going to leave me and go shack up with some other guy? How long have you been fucking him? I always knew you were a fucking whore. Well, if you think I’m just going to let this happen, you’re mistaken, you got that Mackenzie?” he said calmly; too calmly.

“I’m not
fucking
anyone,” I said, realizing I had probably never even said that word in front of him.

“You’re a lying cunt,” he seethed.

“I’m not lying, but I am hanging up now,” I said quietly, not wanting Kash to hear this conversation.

“You’re not hanging up. You’re going to listen to me. You’re going to get your shit and get your ass back home. I’ll forget this whole thing ever happened and we can just go back to normal.”

I almost wanted to laugh, but knew that would be a mistake.
Normal.
My life with Jake was anything but normal. He would probably beat the hell out of me if I ever went back to him, I didn’t have any doubts about that. I finally had a way out and I wasn’t going to screw it up. I didn’t want him, I hadn’t wanted him in a long time. He had made me hate him a long time ago and that wasn’t going to change. He wasn’t going to change, and even if he did, I was done.

“I’m not coming back, Jake. It’s over,” I said.

“How many times do I have to tell you that it’s not up to you?” he said with a laugh.

I was so tired of living under his rule.

“Don’t you get it, Jake? You don’t own me. You don’t get to tell me what to do anymore. I’m not living that way another day. I’m sick of it,” I said loudly, feeling a boldness come over me that I didn’t even know was buried inside me.

“You’re more stupid than I thought,” he said with a laugh, and then silence. He hung up without another word.

I sat my phone down and realized my hands were trembling. I rubbed my hands together trying to make the shaking stop. I wasn’t going to let him scare me anymore. I was taking control of my own life. The thought of it made me nervous, but I was doing this. This was my life. It was the only one I was ever going to have, and I wasn’t going to spend it being miserable. Not one more day.

Just then, I heard music playing from the kitchen area. I listened for a minute. It was Like a Wrecking Ball by Eric Church. I loved that song. I couldn’t spend the whole night in my room, and the smell of pizza made my stomach growl. So I ran a brush through my hair and walked to my door. I was going to have to get used to seeing Kash, and since my boldness was still running through my veins I figured what the hell, and opened the door.

I walked into the kitchen and there he was. He was in a pair of basketball shorts and no shirt. Figures. That tattoo of his displayed and my fingers twitched, longing to run across all the intricate lines and designs. I balled my hand into a fist and pushed that thought out of my mind.

“I never figured you for a country music guy,” I said, as I walked up to him and watched him slice a frozen pizza.

“There’s probably a lot you didn’t figure me for.” He looked at me with a wink as he sucked pizza sauce off of his thumb. That one gesture caused my boldness to melt away. I gripped the countertop to keep from swaying.

“Hungry?” he asked, as he grabbed a couple of plates from the cabinet. I wasn’t anymore. The butterflies had filled my stomach again, and I couldn’t even think about food.

“Sure,” I said, since he was offering. He put a couple of slices of pizza on a plate and handed it to me.

“Wanna beer?” he asked, and I saw him squint as he was eyeing my cheek. Shit.

“I’ll grab them,” I said, as an excuse to move away from him. I grabbed two Bud Lights out of the refrigerator and handed him one. He grabbed mine out of my hand and opened it for me, then gave it back.

He sat his beer on the counter, then walked over to me. He gently ran his index finger along my bruised cheek. I tried my best not to flinch. I also tried my best to keep from panting, since he was so close and touching me.

“What happened here?” he asked, with a genuine look of concern.

“Oh, it’s nothing,” I said. I didn’t want to talk about this. Not now, not to Kash.

“Looks like something to me,” he said, and dropped his hand.

But he didn’t push. He didn’t ask any more questions. He just grabbed his plate and beer, and headed into the living room. I followed behind him like a little puppy. He flipped the channels on the TV, but I wasn’t even paying attention to the screen. I was doing everything in my power to keep from watching him eat. How weird is that? The thought of him eating pizza turned me on. And then he grabbed his beer and took a long swig. I watched as his throat moved as he swallowed and almost had to cross my legs. This can’t be normal. He was going to drive me insane without even trying.

We finished our dinner in silence, and I cleaned up the small mess quickly. Kash went to his room and came out fully dressed. He was wearing dark jeans and a black long sleeve shirt. His hair was styled in that perfect mess that suited him. I wanted to run my fingers through it.

“I’ll see ya later,” he said, as he grabbed his keys off the bar and headed to the front door. I tried not to feel disappointed that he was leaving. My curiosity got the best of me, wondering where he was going. But I didn’t really want to let my mind wander that far, because it didn’t take a genius. Sam had already warned me about the way he was. I got sick to my stomach as visions of him with other women ran through my mind.

“See ya, have fun,” I said with the fakest smile I could muster.

“You gonna be ok here, by yourself?” He stopped at the door, but didn’t look at me, he just stared straight ahead.

“Of course,” I said, with a fake voice to go along with my fake smile.

“Ok, then,” he said, and gave me a wink before heading out the door. I heard him lock it from the outside, once it was shut. That made me smile a little, even though I was pretty sure I knew what he would be doing shortly.