Authors: Janine A. Morris
Playthang (18 page)
31
J
ordan took the night just to spend some time alone and do nothing. She had come a long way from the girl who hated going to clubs, wasn't big on partying, and was against casual sex. Lately, these things felt like they were more important than her career and family, and at one time that's all that mattered. When Jordan was home alone, she couldn't pretend that her newfound way of life was making her happy. She felt empty inside,and she knew that she was doing all these things to fill the void. Of course, she knew that these guys could not fill the void of her child, husband, and best friend. Although she hadn't given up on her child, she had given up on her husband and best friend and all men that pretended to be honest. There was a point when the thought of her son ending up with a girlfriendand treating her wrong made her feel a certain way about him even, but she had every intention of teaching him how to be a better man.
ordan took the night just to spend some time alone and do nothing. She had come a long way from the girl who hated going to clubs, wasn't big on partying, and was against casual sex. Lately, these things felt like they were more important than her career and family, and at one time that's all that mattered. When Jordan was home alone, she couldn't pretend that her newfound way of life was making her happy. She felt empty inside,and she knew that she was doing all these things to fill the void. Of course, she knew that these guys could not fill the void of her child, husband, and best friend. Although she hadn't given up on her child, she had given up on her husband and best friend and all men that pretended to be honest. There was a point when the thought of her son ending up with a girlfriendand treating her wrong made her feel a certain way about him even, but she had every intention of teaching him how to be a better man.
Jordan had run a bubble bath and placed her iPod in her Bose speakers; she went to her R&B playlist and headed into the bedroom to get undressed. Jordan had a television in her bathroom, but she wanted some time to just relax. No television,no stressful thoughts, nothing. Just some candles, some soft music, some hot water, bubbles, and Jordan time. The thing was, most of the time Jordan didn't like being alone, because she had to reflect on all the wrong she was doing and all the wrong that had been done to her. It was just easier to keep busy and try to distract herself. Well, rather, it had been easier.
Jordan had sunk into the hot tub and begun skimming through a magazine. Usher's latest album was playing, and Jordan was actually feeling at peace with herself. Just as she started to hum along to one of her favorite songs, her doorbell rang. Jordanglanced up at her BlackBerry and noticed she had no missed calls and couldn't figure out who could be at the door. She wasn't expecting anyone, so she decided to ignore it. The bell rang again, and after a few more seconds the curiosity got the best of her. Jordan stood up, grabbed her towel, and dried off. She put her robe on and headed downstairs.
“Who is it?” she yelled.
“Marcus,” she heard from the other side of the door.
Jordan wasn't sure what to do. She was standing there in her robe and didn't know if she should answer the door or make him wait. She figured it would be rude to make him wait, and since he had seen all she had anyway, it didn't make a real big deal either way. Jordan walked up to the door and opened it; Marcus was standing there dressed in all brown.
“Sorry to show up unannounced,” he said as soon as Jordanopened the door. “I hope you didn't forget I was stoppingby.”
“I didn't hear from you, so I wasn't sure if you were still coming by,” she said.
“I would've called first, but I was walking by your house and thought I'd just stop by now,” he added.
Jordan giggled. “You sure you weren't trying to run into my ex again?” she joked.
“You got jokes. I'll come back later if you want.”
“It's OK; I was just taking a bath.”
“Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to interrupt.”
“No, not a problem at all. Come and sit down.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yeah, if you don't mind waiting for a bit.”
“Sure, take your time.”
Jordan headed back upstairs to the bathroom. She was tempted to continue her bath and just make him wait, but she knew that was rude. Still, she wanted to at least rinse off since she had rushed out of the bathtub. Jordan went into the bathroomto let the water out of the tub and then walked into her bedroom to get some clothes out of her drawer. By the time she was done, the water was pretty much out of the tub, and Jordan turned on the shower. She hopped in and began to lather up with soap. A couple of moments went by and she heard footsteps. She peeked her head around the shower curtainand noticed Marcus walking toward her. At first she was extremely startled, realizing that this man could murder her right here in her own home and nobody would know.
“Marcus,” she said in a high-pitched voiced.
“I'm so sorry to scare you. I just got excited sitting downstairsthinking about you up here naked.”
Jordan tried to laugh, but that didn't completely ease her nerves. Marcus began to remove his shirt, and it was then that Jordan realized what he had in mind. She was feeling a little nervous but liked his idea. Showering with a man was a bit personal, Jordan felt, and having to be mindful of her hair gettingwet wasn't the sexiest love scene, but Jordan couldn't objectto spontaneity. She had sex with Jayon and Omar in the shower before, but that was it and it was not often. Still, the sight of Marcus, with his built upper body, made her willing to try it again. Within seconds, Marcus was fully undressed and stepping into the shower with her. As soon as he stepped in, he wasted no time at all and began to kiss her and let his hands wander all over her body. It didn't take long before Marcus had Jordan bent over like a scene in a porno. It wasn't the shower that Jordan had in mind, but after a few strokes she wasn't complaining.
32
“I
've never had sex with two guys in one week. I need to see a counselor,” Jordan said in a low, crackly tone.
've never had sex with two guys in one week. I need to see a counselor,” Jordan said in a low, crackly tone.
“Yes, you do. I don't know what has gotten into you,” Chrasey replied quickly.
“Calm down. It's not that serious.You just need to get over this Jayon thing quick before you hurt yourself,” Dakota said.
“It is serious. Jordan has been bugging out since she caught Jayon cheating,” Chrasey replied.
“That's what I mean. She is not built for this and needs to knock it off,” Dakota said.
“Hello? I'm right here. I can hear you two,” Jordan interjected.
The ladies laughed.
“I know that I'm not built for it and that this has just been my way of forgetting Jayon,” Jordan added.
For a moment, Jordan's honesty kept the women silent. They all knew how it felt to be her; they had all experienced the pain of betrayal. Better yet, they had all wanted to throw caution to the wind and live in a place where no pain could hurt them. Hell, it was Dakota's creed at one point, for years to be exact, until David came along. For Jordan, it was the exact opposite. She always had her heart on the line. She always believedthat if you gave your all, good things would come your way. She also believed if you were honest and loved wholeheartedly,that love would conquer all, but on two different occasionswith the two men she trusted most, she was proven wrong.
“Trust me, Jordan, we know what you are going through. We have all been there at one time or another,” Chrasey said.
For real, Chrasey was just there not that long ago when she was infatuated with Trevor.
They all giggled, but Jordan quickly got serious again.
“I know, ladies, but I think I'm losing myself. When Marcusleft here last night, I felt so cheap and so outside of my body. I have to admit I was ashamed,” Jordan said.
“Why? You said you like him,” Dakota asked.
“Yeah, I do. I guess that means I like Donovan too, who I just had sex with two nights ago, and Darren, who I was with last week.”
“Yeah, girl. You are on a roll,” Dakota said, laughing. “I think you got me beat.”
“You better be using protection, that's all I know. You are too grown to be out there carrying on like some high school floozy,” Chrasey said.
“Thanks, Chrasey,” Jordan said. “Not only am I a floozy and a ho, but I'm dumb too.”
“Nobody said all that, but you seem all caught up in the moment, and I can't tell if you're using all of your senses.”
“Yes, I am. Of course I am using protection.You think I'm trying to be on the
Maury
show, trying to find out who the baby's father is or something?”
Maury
show, trying to find out who the baby's father is or something?”
Dakota had been there before and she knew there wasn't anything fun about that.
“For real, it is not cute not knowing who the father of your baby is. There is nothing more that reads whore across your forehead,” Dakota laughed, trying to make fun of the situation.
“Well, thank you, ladies, very much for your comforting advice and kind words,” Jordan said in a sarcastic tone.
“Stop it, J, we are just messing with you,” Dakota said. “You have to understand this seems unreal, us having to lecture you. The tables are so turned we don't even know how to handle it.”
“Shut up,” Jordan said with a giggle. “I gotta go; I will call you guys later.” The girls didn't put up a fight to keep talking; they had been on the phone long enough.
Jordan hung up the phone and went back to watching television. She had spent most of the afternoon getting Jason's room nice and tidy for when he came home next week, and she was taking a break.
About an hour had gone by when her cell phone rang. It was Marcus. Jordan looked at his name in her phone for a few seconds before she decided to not answer it. She put the phone back down and lay back on the couch as she was. She waited for the call to ring to voice mail, and she finally started to pay the show she was watching attention again. She tried to pretendthat she couldn't care less that he called, but she could feel her curiosity wondering if he would leave a message. She didn't have a real reason not to answer, other than him possibly wantingto come over and her not wanting company. Besides, with Jason coming home soon, he wouldn't be able to come over much at all anyway. Things were going to have to change. She had put Jason through enough, and she didn't want to have him seeing different men come and go out of his mother's life.
A few moments later, her phone vibrated to alert her that there was a voice mail left. She picked up the phone and dialed the inbox.
“Hey, it's Marcus. I'm heading home from Brooklyn. I wanted to see if you wanted me to stop and bring you anythingover. Call me when you get this.”
Jordan was so touched at his thoughtfulness, and although she was tempted to request some butter pecan Häagen-Dazs, ice cream, she tried to refrain from calling him back. His voice filled her mind some more, and she imagined him looking so fine driving on the highway in his lovely car. She was starting to prefer that he did come over, but she was debating with herself. She held out a few minutes longer, and then finally went ahead and dialed his number back.
“Hey, Marcus,” she said as he answered the phone.
“Hey, babe,” he replied.
“I got your message and wanted to take you up on your offer.”
“Cool, I'm not that far.What would you like?”
“I'll take some Häagen-Dazs ice cream, butter pecan.”
He laughed. “OK,” he replied.
“Why you laughing?” she asked.
“No reason. I'll see you in a little while.”
Jordan hung up the phone and leaned back on the couch. She had a subtle smile on her face, like a schoolgirl blush. She just didn't know what it was about him, but as much as she wasn't trying to like him, she was kind of feeling this guy.
33
T
he sunshine that was squeezing through the blinds was faintly lighting Jordan's office. She didn't bother to flick the switch when she walked in; she just headed straight to her desk to put her things down. Once she reached her desk, she plopped down in her seat.The office was still quiet; Jordan beat the rest of the staff in. She wasn't feeling too well through the night, so she got up a little earlier. Surprisingly, she had a fast ride inânot as much traffic as usual. She sat there for a bit with her head relaxed against the back of her black leather chair. The crisp scent from the plug-in air freshener was filling her nose as she sat in silence and practically in the dark.
he sunshine that was squeezing through the blinds was faintly lighting Jordan's office. She didn't bother to flick the switch when she walked in; she just headed straight to her desk to put her things down. Once she reached her desk, she plopped down in her seat.The office was still quiet; Jordan beat the rest of the staff in. She wasn't feeling too well through the night, so she got up a little earlier. Surprisingly, she had a fast ride inânot as much traffic as usual. She sat there for a bit with her head relaxed against the back of her black leather chair. The crisp scent from the plug-in air freshener was filling her nose as she sat in silence and practically in the dark.
The next few steps were to turn on her computer, put some things away, look through files, and start her to-do list. Her morning was on hold for a moment, and Jordan just sat there reflecting. A million thoughts were running through her head about all that she had been through in the past year, and that she would continue going through until she found some normalcy again. Her girls Dakota and Chrasey were usually an intricate part of her healing process with any problems, but in this situation they just hadn't been the cure. Jordan figured it was because she was used to feeling like the one who had it together. She had the healthier relationships and more successful career. Usually she felt like she was on top of the world, and her friends reminded her that she was too blessed to be stressed.
Thing was, this time, her relationship was nonexistent and her career wasn't looking too great. Omar wasn't paying her any alimony because she was making more than him at the time of the divorce, she was paying for their huge house by herself, and her money situation wasn't at its best. Since the issue with Jayon, she had missed about a dozen appointments, two that included potential new clients and others including influential clients. She had been trying to ignore all the problems she was having in her life, but they were getting to the point where she just couldn't ignore them anymore.
A high-pitched ring came from Jordan's office phone and broke her train of thought. Jordan leaned forward and noticed Tayese's number in her caller ID. Her secretary wasn't in yet, so she went ahead and answered the phone.
“Girl, what are you doing in the office so early?” Tayese asked.
“Just got here early, no reason.Why are you in the office so early?”
“I'm always in the office this early. Unlike you, I have a boss.”
“Shut up,” Jordan said with a chuckle.
“Guess who called me yesterday?” Tayese asked.
“Who?” Jordan said.
“Donovan,”Tayese said, sounding excited.
“Donovan? For what?” Jordan said, trying to remain calm.
Jordan hadn't gotten around to telling Tayese about her and Donovan, and this didn't seem like a good time to tell her.
“He asked me out on a date,”Tayese said.
Jordan's mouth dropped, not that Tayese could see it.
“Are you kidding me?”
Jordan didn't want to tell her, but she knew if she didn't she would have been as wrong as two left feet for letting her get excited over this man, who was clearly a dog.
“No, he called last night. He said he wanted just the two of us to hang out this Friday at the W.”
What kind of friends had he mistook them for?
Jordan was thinking. Did he think they didn't speak at all, or did he just think they were desperate and wouldn't care? Whatever he was thinking, Jordan was pissed off at the thoughts.
Jordan was thinking. Did he think they didn't speak at all, or did he just think they were desperate and wouldn't care? Whatever he was thinking, Jordan was pissed off at the thoughts.
“Tayese, I didn't get to speak to you since it happened, but Donovan and I hung out at the W after dinner.”
“What?” Tayese said.
“Yeah, that man thinks he must be some mack daddy.”
“What happened? What was y”all hanging out for?”Tayese asked, sounding very curious and upset.
“We were initially just hanging out, and then I got into a fight with this girl, which is a whole 'nother story, and then we went upstairs. He had a room, and although I am so ashamed to admit it, I slept with him.”
“What?”Tayese said, sounding in complete shock.
“I know,” Jordan said. “To make it worse, he is trying to holler at you like we aren't friends.”
“Are we friends, Jordan?” Tayese asked.
“What?” Jordan said, confused. “Yeah, we are friends.”
“I don't know anymore.You knew I was feeling Donovan, and yet you hung out with him behind my back and slept with him.”
“Tayese, that night I invited you and Eddie along. He asked me to dinner, and I invited you. How was that behind your back?”
“That was supposed to be business. Besides, you knew me and him were flirting at the table.”
“Really, I didn't, Tayese. If you would have said something, I would've never slept with him.”
“I told you at the club I was feeling him, and I made it quite clear at dinner that night, but that didn't seem to matter. You just trying to fuck everything in sight,”Tayese said.
Jordan was shocked by her comment. She couldn't believe she said that.
“You calling me a ho, Tayese?” Jordan asked.
“I'm just calling it how I see it.You can label yourself. I got to go.”Tayese said and hung up.
Jordan hung up the phone in total disbelief. She wanted to call Tayese back, and then she was tempted to call Donovan and curse him out, but she decided against either and chose to just sit back and relax for a second. Her heart was racing; she was so upset, it was taking her a minute to calm down. She understoodthat Tayese was upset, but what kind of friend was she being by taking it there over some man?
A few moments later, Jordan could hear someone talking outside of her office. Some of the staff were beginning to come in to work. Jordan still sat there in the dark, waiting for her secretary to come in and turn the lights on and get Jordan's day prepped for her as she normally did when she beat Jordan in. Jordan waited as she thought over her conversation with Tayese, and she tried to figure out if she should have done or said something differently. As mad as she was at Tayese for saying what she said, she was also feeling a little guilty.
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