Obsession (A Bad Boy's Secret Baby) (6 page)

“I wanted to! More than anything. But it was complicated. My brother was—”

“I was your brother too!” Brendan shoved a finger into my chest and screamed in my face. “And I will be damned, if I let you do to my sister what your mom did to my father. You should never have come back and reopened old wounds. Leave town. Tonight. Or so help me, I will run you out of it.”

The words hung ominously for a few seconds, before Brendan turned his back on me and started to walk away.

“No.” My declaration was softly spoken, yet steadfast in its resolve. I would not be swayed. I hated to cause my old friend pain, but I just couldn't abandon Kait. Not again. Never again.

Brendan stopped, even his breathing was audible and full of rage. He whirled, his back hand a blur of motion and steel. Everyone recoiled from the gunshots that Brendan pumped into my bike. He walked toward it, emptying the magazine until it clicked. Brendan then kicked it over.

He locked eyes with me while deftly reloading his pistol. A few strong strides put him within arms-length. I didn't make any moves to stop whatever was coming next.

The hot gun barrel sizzled against the side of my head. Brendan's eyes were dulled from booze and rage, but sharp enough to cross a line that you never came back from. Even his cop buddies rushed to talk their friend down.

He blamed me for the death of his father, if not directly, than by association. A big part of me agreed with him. I should've done more, but as much as I wanted to, I couldn't have come back any sooner. Not while Tonya was still my brother's legal guardian.

“You're no different than your mother. Leave. Kait. Alone.” Brendan ignored the concerned calls from his friends and pushed the gun harder. My head yielded slightly beneath the searing kiss of the metal barrel.

His words stung more than the burning metal. I hated my mother and had spent years distancing myself from her morally and psychologically, but I couldn't cut her completely out of my life, not when she basically held my younger brother for ransom.

“I'm sorry,” I closed my eyes. I'd been to Afghanistan twice, I was no stranger to being that close to death. I wasn't a psychopath, though, and the thought of death still scared the hell out of me. It always would. But the military taught me not to be controlled by that fear. Fighting for the things you love sometimes meant not fighting at all. Sometimes you just had to stand strong. “I can't.”

I felt the gun shake in Brendan's hand.

“If I catch you with her again...” He didn't need to finish the threat, I understood his intention. Brendan was never good at concealing his emotions. He was always straight forward and genuinely meant everything he said. It made being his friend easy, because I always knew what was on his mind.

It unfortunately made being his enemy easy too.

The heat and pressure abruptly disappeared. Brendan holstered his gun. One of his friends tried to comfort Brendan by putting a hand on his shoulder. Brendan brushed it off and got back into his truck and left.

I got all my effects back, but my bike was impounded because it was too damaged to ride. Officer Drew Winter told me, in no uncertain terms, that as far as the law was concerned I just lost control of my bike. And that nothing else happened.

I didn’t bother asking for a ride across town to my motel, I knew I wouldn't get one. The long walk cleared my head.

For years Brendan and I had been inseparable.

Gone were the days we walked along the creek as children, trying to catch frogs. I could still recall which Xmen we were when we played. I could remember, years later, the first time we smuggled a bottle of Southern Comfort from his dad's liquor cabinet.

Growing up, I was at his house more than my own. I got to see Kait's transformation from a bratty kid sister to a beautiful woman. It was the last six months, when we moved in officially because our parents were dating, that everything fell apart.

All that was gone. Brendan and I were both so different now. We were hardened by tragedy and time. I'd lost too many overseas to not cherish the very few friends I had left, even if they did hate me.

Had Brendan pulled that trigger, I'd have ruined my friend's life for a second time.

Maybe he was right. Maybe I should've never come back at all. Everyone seemed to be doing fine without me. Had I really missed my window? Eight years was an eternity. Even Kait seemed happy enough at the wedding.

What the fuck was I really doing here? Was it just selfishness that brought me back to Springfield?

I felt like an astronaut floating in space, only to return home and find that the world has moved on without him.

Kait

––––––––

P
lease don't go.

Could I be any more desperate? It was so pathetic.

I spent most of my morning in my bedroom staring at the ceiling, running over the events of last night in my head and nursing a hangover. Mal came back and swept me off my feet. It still felt surreal. All those muscles and tattoos, he looked so good that my breath quickened at the thought of them.

As amazing as the date had been, I had this pit in my stomach from the whole thing. I shouldn't have had sex with him. Never have sex with someone you have that many conflicting emotions for, especially if they've just stormed back into your life after a million years.

More than that, it felt like a betrayal to my father. Brendan laid the blame for Dad's passing more on Mal than I did. When I'd argue with him about it, he'd just say that I was blinded by my feelings for Mal like Dad was with Tonya.

I understood how Brendan felt, but I knew Mal; I grew up with him. Mal wasn't anything like his mom. Just before he and his brother moved in Mal had finally started to notice me. I was only a grade younger than he was, but back then that was enough of a barrier. That and I was always so shy and reserved.

After a little while all the barriers between us started to fall away. When Brendan was playing football, Mal would take me on hikes. Sometimes we'd all go to the movies together. They weren't really dates, but Mal and I would hold hands in secret.

Eventually we stopped caring about the secrecy and just started hanging out in public, just the two of us. Brendan was pissed at first, but even he got over it.

Mal
was
different. He promised he'd never leave me.

But he's broken his promises in the past... I covered my face with my hands. I shouldn't have had sex with him. What if that was all he wanted and now he would disappear again, just like last time? That would destroy me all over again!

I wanted to scream, but my phone did it for me. It was a text from Brendan saying we needed to talk. How did he find out that Mal was back already? Brendan had a way of treating me like I was still a little girl so I had no interest in talking to him about Mal.

That was going to be hard because we both lived in the same house we'd grown up in. It was a little weird now that Brendan was married, but Dad left it to both of us in his will. So it was just as much mine as his and I couldn't afford my own place right now.

I glanced over at my alarm clock. I couldn't lay in bed and torture myself anymore. Not because I didn't want to, but because I had to go to work. I forced myself out of bed, took a shower and got dressed.

I was looking forward to work. Everything was so much simpler with my kids. There was no room for adult stress during our adventures. Today I was taking them to go see Star Wars and I was just as excited as they were to see it.

On days like today they were the only reason I got out of bed at all.

“Shit!” I was just opening the front door when I realized that I didn't have my car. It was still at the church. Mal had dropped me off at home this morning because I was still too drunk to drive, even if my car wasn't all messed up.

“You need a lift to your car?” Brendan turned a corner rubbing sleep from his eyes. He was looking worse for wear and probably suffering from a fierce hangover. It was just before noon and it didn't look like Mariela had even gotten up yet.

“Probably not. The damn thing crapped out on me yesterday on the way to the reception,” I sighed. So much for avoiding Brendan. “You look like hell, Brendan. Go back to bed. I can have a friend pick me up.”

“Nah, I gotta swing by the station to fill out some paperwork anyways.” Brendan was already dressed and ready to go, he was just running at about quarter speed.

“You sure? It's not a big deal.” Even as I said it I knew there was no talking him out of it. In his mind, his baby sister needed saving again...

“It's fine, the church is on the way, we'll see if we can bring it back to life one more time. Coffee's on you, by the way”

“Alright,” I said, texting Children's Hope to let them know I was running late.

Brendan loaded up his pickup truck and we left. I knew what he wanted to talk about but it had been a long time since we discussed Dad, Mal or what happened. Every time he broached the subject I diverted him.

Everyone else had picked up their car which left Juan Carlos all alone in the middle of the lot. My poor red Jetta looked abandoned when we pulled up.

“You have your key, right?” Brendan pulled his toolbox out of the bed.

I checked my pockets, but came up empty. My head lulled in defeat, I wanted to cry. My head was all over the place this morning, of course I forgot my key.

“Seriously?” Brendan leaned on the hood and shook his head. The spare! I reached my hand under the frame, opened the lock box and grabbed my spare. Brendan just shook his head again. “Alright, open her up. Let's see what's up.”

I unlocked the door and popped the hood. Out of habit, I slid the key into the ignition and turned it over. Juan Carlos started right up. I was shocked.

“You said there was something wrong with this right?” Brendan asked, checking the fluids and connections.

“There was yesterday.”

“From the way you described it I thought it was a spark plug issue, but these are new. It looks like you just had them changed.”

Only I knew for a fact that I didn't. Cars didn't magically repair themselves. There was grease on the back of Mal's hand last night. I racked my brain trying to remember what he said. He was
doing maintenance work on a friend's car.

Did he mean my car? Had he fixed my car while I was at the wedding?

“Looks like you don't need to take it out back and shoot it today.” Brendan closed my hood and loaded up his tools.

“Thanks anyways, Brendan.” I clasped my seat belt over me and was about to make a speedy get away.

“Hold up.” He reached through my open window and turned my car off. That pit in my stomach expanded tenfold. “We still need to talk. I know you saw
him
last night.”

“So?” I should've been more insulted about Brendan prying in my personal life, but to be honest, it was too soon to tell if Mal was back for good or not.

“C'mon, Kait. You're smarter than that.” Brendan hung his head. “What would Dad say?”

“He'd probably say not to guilt trip me,” I said coldly. Brendan could be so mean sometimes when he was trying to get his point across. “Mal's not his mother.”

“No. He's worse.” Brendan raised his head to look at me, anger hardened his gaze. “
He
came back.”

I looked away.

“Do you even know how many girls he slept with in high school? Because I do. Mal was a fun guy and a good friend for a while, but even I knew that he didn't give a fuck about women. They were just toys to him.”

Mal was with a lot of girls in high school and it made me crazy jealous. We never dated, though, so wasn't that okay? We only ever even kissed once and that was right before he left.

“I don't know what his game is, but I know he didn't come back for you. He's using you for...fuck I don't know. Maybe he just wants to fuck you because he never got the chance when we were younger.”

“How can you say that?” I shot back defiantly. Brendan was getting under my skin. It felt like the bad times again, just before dad died. Right before it became the worst times. “You haven't seen him in eight years. You don't know a thing about him now!”

“Do you?”

No. I really didn't...

Brendan's simple question robbed me of an answer. Mal was sweet and charismatic and obscenely hot, but we'd only spent a few hours together. How could you really know a person in that short of time? The wounded part of me that couldn't forget that pain chirped in the back of my head.

What if Mal
was
using me?

“I'm just worried about you. I love you, Sis. We've lost both our parents.” Brendan's tone lost its hostility. “I can't lose you too.”

It was hard to be mad at someone that was genuinely concerned for you. I just wish he could see Mal the way I saw him. There was goodness in him. I couldn't explain why or how I knew there was. I just knew. Maybe it was foolish, but I trusted him.

“I know. But you have to let me figure this out myself.”

“I don't trust him, Kait.” Brendan's voice deepened slightly and his gaze slipped past me as if he was peering into the past itself. After a moment his eyes snapped back to me. “Call him, see if he answers?” He shrugged. “Mal might have already abandoned you. Again.”

Blind trust. How could I offer that to Mal so freely? Was that how Dad felt about Tonya? The thought made me shiver.

“I gotta go.” Uncertainty crept into my heart. What if he didn't answer? “I'm late for work.”

Brendan nodded, knocked on the door of my car then backed away so I could leave.

When I got to Children's I immediately fished my phone out of my purse. I spent the next twenty minutes sitting in my car staring at the blinking text messaging cursor.
Type message
, read the text box beneath Mal's number.

Hey.

That was all I could come up with.

I stuffed the phone back into my purse; I really was late. I shuffled inside and made my apologies. As always they were completely understanding. I technically wasn't even scheduled to come in that day, but I promised a few of the kids that we could watch the movie together.