Motown Throwdown (30 page)

“What do you mean my dads taking you in? When did you see Gage? Did he hurt you?”

“Rest first,” he says carrying me out. “Details later.”

With him carrying me, my mind didn’t know where to start. My dads or Gage. I mean Rome was alive and breathing but my brother hated him, right?

“Something wrong with your hand?” she asks taking it gently and turning it over.

“Hurt it during practice,” I mumble. “The trainer can check it out tomorrow.”

“Or,” she says softly. “I can check it now.”

Not saying shit, I watch her test my range of motion until she gets to my middle finger and I flinch.

“It’s dislocated,” she whispers as not to disturb the other students.

“Figures,” I groan.

“You’ve got a big game Friday,” she says running her finger tips over my swollen knuckle. “If this isn’t set you won’t be able to throw at all. Do you trust me, Roman?”

“You’re the only person I do trust, Teach.”

“Good answer,” she says gripping my wrist with her left hand then using the right to rip my God damn finger off.

“Fuck!” I yell trying to pull away. Moving it around, I watch her reach into her bag, grab some tape and start to wrap my three fingers together.

“Ibuprofen, elevation, and ice,” she says smiling. “You’ll be good as new.”

No matter how much grief I gave her, she came back to me. Maybe she knew like I did that we were the perfect pair stuck in an imperfect situation. She had her shit together, I did not. She came to that game on Friday and despite the soreness, I played my ass off for her.

Since the day I saw her picture on the forum, I knew she was meant for me. Back then I didn’t have the skills to go about claiming her the right way. I was too caught up in my own world, my own shit to treat her right. Back then girls were notches, bragging rights, and a one-time thing. Kandace made me a better person but it took a lot of nasty shit happening to me for me to listen. She was always there even when I didn’t deserve it.

Everything in my life, the good and the bad led up to this. The part where I came into manhood fully and was ready to be the man she knew I could be. Twenty nine would be the age where I finally got my shit together. Twenty nine would always be my number. But Kandace Kane had my number from day one.

It took her leaving, which sucked. But I pulled it together. Her dads played a part, Rio and Bet played a part, Jules, Bishop and the crew did too but it all came back to her. The one who always knew I could be more, just as soon as I got out of my own way first.

“Rest first,” I tell her carrying her out to my car. “Details later.”

She was back in my arms and for now, how I got to a good place could wait. I’d thought I’d lost her forever, I thought I’d never see her again. Once home, I set her on the couch, grabbed blankets, pillows and a bottle of water with the promise to come right back. Of course her dads called to see if she forgave me and after speaking with them I came back to her passed out with her mouth open. Content to sit here while she slept, I spoke to her, said all things that needed to be said knowing I’d say them again when she was awake. Then Gage showed up and decided to keep me company playing video games. A few times she stirred but sleep wouldn’t release her and until it did, I would be right here.

“I was hoping to kill you,” he says looking over at me.

“Sorry to disappoint,” I offer sarcastically.

“You should be sorry. At the very least we should fight. Did she forgive you?” he asks.

“I’m not fighting you,” I tell him. “And I think she did, I mean she’s here. When she wakes up you’re leaving, if you don’t we
will
fight.”

“Whatever,” he says getting back to the game. “Make sure you feed her, she’s too skinny.”

“She’s perfect,” If he so much as upset her about losing weight I’d club him to death for it…

“I know she is,” he growls back. “Making sure you knew.”

“We done bonding now?” I ask rolling my eyes.

Laughing at me, he looks over and sees her watching us. “There she is,” he says with his face lighting up for her.

“How long was I out?” she asks rubbing her eyes. They talk for a bit but he kept his word and left which was good because in a fight I’m pretty sure against him, I’d lose. Seriously, there was something ‘off’ about that guy.

“You’re better than him,” Gage says wiping the tears from my eyes. He found me crying on the side of the house and like always, was there when I needed him most. “Forget he exists. For fucks sake, sis, erase the guy from your memory. He’s in there fucking another girl right now, it will never be you, Kandace. Be glad it isn’t you.”

“I c-can’t,” I wail into his shirt. “I love him.”

“Don’t waste that love on that piece of shit. He’ll never love you when he’s too busy loving himself.”

“He’s not always like that,” I whisper hating that after the massive blow he delivered verbally that I’d still defend him to my own brother. “You don’t know him like I do.”

“He should never be like that at all! Christ, you’re eighteen and he’s a whore. There’s a guy out there for you---“

“I can’t help who I love, Gage!”

“Just let me kill him,” he says pacing. “Swear to God, he comes within five feet of you I will fucking destroy him.” Then we were both spared any further arguing when the cops arrived and we watched as Roman was led away in handcuffs.

“There,” says Gage holding me up. “That’s the mother fucker you fell in love with.”

He took me to his place which I appreciated. Had we gone to mine I would have felt the need to dust, check my messages and make a grocery list. Now I’m on his couch with a pillow and blanket waiting for him to come sit with me. Only he must have taken more than sixty seconds because once my head hit that pillow, I was out.

I could hear his voice, smell him all around me but I couldn’t open my eyes so I snuggled in deeper. He was talking to someone on the phone, I could smell food in the kitchen and finally I heard music playing softly. Still, I was happy where I was because I knew he was close by. His fingers ran through my hair, over my face and down my arms. He told me he loved me often and then I heard another voice, a voice that didn’t belong here.

Opening my eyes right away my body felt heavy, rested. Craning my neck back, I see my brother Gage sitting next to Rome, playing video games? Red alert!

“There she is,” Gage says winking at me.

“How long was I out?”

“About seventeen hours,” says Rome coming over to me.

“I love you, big brother, but you being here is freaking me out.”

“Rome and I are besties,” he says getting back to his game.

“Uh huh,” I say sitting up. “Don’t bullshit me, spill it.”

“I’m great, thanks for asking,” he says shutting the game down. “You, little sister, look like shit. You’re too skinny and seriously pale. No spray tans in the desert?”

“We can’t all have the skin color you two have,” I say rolling my eyes because really, they both did dark brown really well.

“What’s going on, Gage?”

“We’ll get to that later,” he says leaning over me. “See you at dads tomorrow, we’ll talk.”

“Dammit, Gage, don’t leave---“ I snap after he kisses me on the forehead. Walking out you didn’t even hear the door close or his truck start up. Gage, I swear had the ability to be invisible if he wanted, always had. If he didn’t want to be found, you were shit out of luck. Playing hide and go seek with him as a kid sucked for me. One day my dads were going to find out what he was hiding and they were not going to like it.

“How long has he been here?” I ask Rome as he hands me a glass of orange juice.

“About six hours,” he says kissing my temple.

“I should probably explain Gage to you,” I try.

“I already know,” he says softly. “We’re cool. But I don’t want to talk about him, I want to talk about you. How do you feel?”

“Fine,” I begin but then I was off the couch and in his lap.

Burying his face in my neck, he’s quiet for a bit before he coming back to face me. “You’re really here,” he says touching my cheek like he can’t believe it. “God I missed you.”

“I missed you too,” I tell him leaning into his hand. “You didn’t make me go though, I chose to. I may have used it as an opportunity to do some good but I ran away and I’m not proud of that.”

“Stop letting me off the hook,” he says leaning me back to stare me down. “I fucked up, not you. My mind can’t even comprehend what the fuck was going on in yours when you fought to save her life knowing she’s all I had. I know you tried, Kandace I knew then too. I just… Look in my eyes, see it for yourself, I’m at peace.”

I couldn’t look anywhere else if I tried because it was true, the pain normally etched around his eyes was gone. Leaning forward and kissing each lid, I press my forehead to his and whisper, “Helmet to helmet.”

“I never forgot that. You got my ass good that day,” he says on a laugh. “Doc?”

“Hmm?”

“Tell me.”

“I love you, number twenty nine.”

“God damn,” he whispers into my lips giving me soft kisses. “I love you, Teach.”

Running my hands over his forearms I asked him what some of the ink meant on his left arm. My name, I understood, and was of course, swooning about it. The music notes made sense as did the stethoscope but it was the art that wasn’t about me that I wanted to hear about. Twisting, turning and pointing he explains it all. From wanting redemption to forgiveness to a second chance it was all there in symbols and script. Each piece was phenomenal and powerful like he was. Here was an innocent man who lost ten years and a football career and never once did he cry foul. He’s dealt with anger and regret, of course, but never has he hosted a pity party. Roman Peterson lost his young adult years but was making these new years count. I have never been so proud of him. In truth, had we never had this time apart he may not have felt the need to do this, it took losing me that got him to take that first step. 

“It’s your life,” I say tracing it. “What a life, Rome. I love it, this is you.”

“Wake up,” she says running her fingers through my goatee.

“I’m up,” I mumble pulling her to me. “You okay? Need something?”

“No,” she says resting her head on my chest. “Okay, yes, I do.”

“Tell me.”

“I love you, Rome,” she says quietly.

“I meant tell me what you need.”

“Oh,” she laughs. Then sliding her hand down my stomach and resting it on my cock she says, “You, I need you.”

This morning she broke down in the shower. It didn’t last long, about five minutes or so but it wasn’t because of our past bullshit it was because of her time overseas. When I asked her if she wanted to talk about it she went for it. I listened in the shower, while she dried her hair, ate breakfast and driving to get coffee. Sitting outside with our drinks she unfolds two pieces of paper and hands one to me. “You were with me for this one, remember?” she asks showing me the picture of her I could never forget. “Nicky was the first. Flip it over,” she says pointing. On the back of the drawing were names and dates. Dozens of them. In dark black ink was even my grandma’s name too. “Here,” she says handing me another piece of paper. She had hand written hundreds of names and their meanings. She was with every one of these people when they passed and her bravery humbled me.