Loving Alex (9 page)

“Marry me…..please?” He says so
softly. I look into those beautiful eyes, surrounded by that tatty-head of his,
my lover is truly stunning and despite my daily pinches to reassure myself that
it
is
all real I cannot fully comprehend why he fell for me. Me falling
for him, now that’s different and quite reasonable, I mean what girl wouldn’t
fall for him!

“James.” Is about all I can
manage. I’m totally taken back by his announcement, his proclamation, his
question! “James…I, well, I….” I’m flummoxed!

“Please say yes!” He begs
whispering, pleading quietly all the time holding onto my hand for dear life,
he frowns, a painful expression on his face, willing me to give the answer he
wants.

I look away from him, around the
bistro, it’s still quiet I half expected to see an audience as I looked away
but no, there’s just one or two tables occupied and a couple of waiting staff
keeping themselves busy. I look back at him as Gia returns with a bottle of
Chianti.

“You two look very cosy.” She
says as she ruffles James’ locks.

“We are,” James says “Do you
know Gia? Do you know how much I love this woman?” He says to the lady he
claims to have adopted.

“She’s very difficult
not
to love, she’s a heart of gold!” Gia smiles fondly at him and then at me.

I look at James and then at Gia again.
I take my other hand and place it on top of his, “Yes” I whisper.

James stands up so quickly his
long legs bash the underside of the table sending cutlery and a glass flying,
smashing onto the floor. He steps over the destruction and moves around to me,
Gia steps out of the way to avoid being knocked to the ground, her hands fly up
as she protects the bottle of wine, her face absolutely stunned by the
lightening speed at which James has moved, of course she has no idea why he is
moving at warp speed.

He grabs me around the waist and
pulls me so close, planting a thoroughly deep and intense kiss upon my lips,
his lips soft, firm and persistent. He pulls away and looks at me with that “
into
my soul look”
. “
You
have made me the happiest man on the planet Alex
Drake!” He kisses me again, I’m stunned into silence and for a moment I feel
like an outsider looking on, detached as he clings onto me as if his life
depends on it.

Poor Gia’s bewildered, she still
has no idea of what’s just happened she just stands there with the bottle of
wine in one hand and the other held up in question, she looks
totally
perplexed.

Eventually James comes down from
the metaphorical ceiling, his smile is broad, his face is lit he looks so very
happy, me? What have I done? I’ve just agreed to marry him and I’m still
married to Lewis and the way things are going I reckon I’ll still be married to
Lewis in 20 years time, if I’ve not worried myself into an early grave before
then! My heart is pounding, my stomach feels in knots yet I’m happy, happier
than I’ve been for years. A lifetime!

James let’s lose of me slightly
and moves his arms to my shoulders, he pushes me back a little, but doesn’t
lose his grip. He looks at Gia the smile lights the room, she looks as confused
as I feel.

“She said yes Gia!” He laughs,
“She said yes!”

Gia still looks very confused,
“That’s very nice James. What did she say yes to?” She says calmly as she puts
the bottle of wine down on the table and produces a bottle opener having no
idea what has just happened.

“Don’t open that.” James says
quickly. “Can we have some fizz, whatever you’ve got!”

“What did she say yes to James?”
She asks, very firmly.

“She’s going to
marry me!”
He
almost sings it as he lets go of me and throws his arms around the rotund
little Gia.

“Really?” She laughs.

“Really Gia, she said
yes!”
He
says very loudly.

We are now the centre of
attention, thank God the place is quiet this evening.

“Roberto, Roberto!” Gia shouts
into the kitchen, “Come here, now!”

Whilst we wait for Roberto to
appear Gia pulls me close, “I’m so happy for you Alex.”

I’m still speechless, I just
don’t have the words, I must look like a goldfish, my mouth opening and closing
as I start to speak, my mind recalling the words I had started to form, my
heart still racing the knots in my stomach refusing to go.

Roberto appears from the back of
the bistro, responding to Gia’s calls but also following the noise, the cheer
that has erupted from James in the main dining area.

“What’s going on?” He asks in
all seriousness.

“Oh Roberto,” Gia walks towards
her husband, her arms outstretched, “our James has asked Alex to marry him…she
said yes!”

He smiles, looks at Gia, James
and me –“Wonderful, absolutely bloody wonderful son and about time too!” He
pulls me into a hug, which affords him a scowl from James and then he takes
James’ hand shaking it hard and coupling it with a firm slap on the other arm.

“Well done son. Now you
have
to look after her!” He warns waving his finger in James’ face.

“Oh, I will Roberto, don’t you
worry – I will look after her in every way.” He winks at Roberto who shakes his
head.

“I mean protect James, I know
you know how to look after a woman in
that
respect, but I’m talking
about the
proper
looking after!” He passes on his words of advice.

I’m still overwhelmed and can’t
believe what I’ve done. Yes, I love James, very much, he’s kind and caring and
totally different to Lewis. But this is all too soon, much too soon! I feel
like I’m in a whirlwind, I feel out of control.

Someone brings a bottle of
Prosecco, I’m unsure who. Glasses of the golden bubbles are given out.

The few diners that are in the
restaurant start to leave as they finish their meals. One or two offer words of
congratulations. Despite my confusion and astonishment at the turn of events,
although deep down I think I knew it would happen at some point, the place
feels warm, such a warm and homely atmosphere, and I feel a comforting feeling
– a happy feeling, a feeling in the pit of my stomach that I’ve not felt for so
long, much too long.

“We’ve no more bookings
tonight.” Roberto adds as he returns from the kitchen with a variety of
nibbles, there’s crudities, calamari, some cured meats and crusty bread, to be
honest I’m no longer hungry. Did James plan this or was it impromptu?

I spend the remainder of the
evening in a sort of daze. I smile and accept compliments graciously. Gia asks
me when we plan to marry – hell I didn’t even know anything about it until a
few hours ago, I can’t do anything at all until I’m divorced, the soonest that
will be is at least six weeks from now! I said yes, what have I done? What the
hell have I agreed to?

It’s soon nearly twelve and
James decides it’s time for us to leave. Gia and Roberto look shattered and
most definitely ready for their beds. A taxi is called as James has had one too
many glasses of fizz to consider driving. The Audi is locked and left outside
the bistro to be collected first thing in the morning.

I can’t sleep, tossing and turning,
mithering about what I’ve done, what I’ve agreed to. There’s no doubt about it
I love him, deeply, he makes me feel so, well so good about myself. He’s helped
me through my lowest times where others would have legged it so fast you
wouldn’t have seen them for dust. But marriage! What the hell have I done? I’m
not even free to marry anyone! Do I want to marry again? Has he latched onto me
for the money? No, surely James wouldn’t do that – Would he? I don’t think so!
I hope not. The emotions, the thoughts tumble and spiral through my mind.

I glance at the clock for the
hundredth time since I climbed into bed at one this morning, it’s still only
four. I look at My James and despite my feelings regarding marriage I still
adore him – he’s sleeping deeply, he looks so peaceful, I could swear he’s even
smiling in his sleep!

Carefully, so as not to disturb
him, I climb out of bed and creep downstairs. I make myself a cup of tea and
grab the biscuit tin, I feel in need of comfort food! Sitting at the island
with my mug of Assam and a tin full of chocolate digestives - proper thinking
food. I think about how my life has changed. About Lewis, my mum and dad, my
Mother – Maggie and Anna, who will be home in a few days but not for long
before she heads off to university.

I love James so very much, but
marriage! Huh, I can’t even contemplate it until I know that Lewis won’t mess
me around. I decide that I need to speak with Shauna – again. I need to be
clear in my head that things will go smoothly, but something doesn’t feel
right, maybe its paranoia? I don’t know anything other than Lewis
is
making life difficult. For now, all I can do is hope that in a little over six
weeks a document will be sent to the court, they will process it and I will be
divorced, unless Lewis creates waves before then, and I have no doubt in my
mind at all that something will happen. What David told me this evening backs
up my thoughts that Lewis is after as much as he can get, not happy with
£2.5million and a free house, he wants more. Hell, he probably wants the lot!

I pick up another biscuit and
make more tea. My plan of action for later today has to be to speak with Shauna
first, before I do anything else.

My thinking extends to anything
and everything, over working my mind. Maybe it’s the mash-up of everything
that’s happened over the last couple of months that’s making me feel so uneasy
about the marriage thing, about everything. Part of me wants to marry James, so
desperately to become a proper wife, a wife that looks after her husband and in
return is looked after and protected and yet part of me wants to run away from
it all, to bury my head in the sand. I wish I had someone to talk to, my mum or
my dad, anyone not involved in this, this drama.

I hear James walking around
upstairs, I glance at the clock, its seven. I’ve been sat here for the last
three hours, drinking tea and eating biscuits, at least I’ve got things clearer
in my mind, I hope anyway.

I hear the toilet flush and him
walking down stairs, he comes through to the kitchen with that big silly grin
all over his mush. “Morning Blossom – God I love you,” he comes towards me,
grabbing me around the waist, “you smell of the beach, you always smell of
holidays!” He nuzzles my neck.

“That’ll be the coconuts.” I
laugh, reaching up and putting my arms around his neck.

“I like it,” he kisses my neck
again, “I like your smell so very much.”

“I hope you do, ‘cause after
what you did last night you’d better get used to it, even if you don’t!”

He laughs, “You are so fucking
fuckable Alex Drake, no scrub that, you’re going to be Alex Aconi, I like it!”

“Umm. Hold your horses Bossman,
I’m not divorced yet!” I remind him.

“Don’t piss on my parade!” He
looks down at me, the smiling diminishing, just a little. “I’m loving it,
loving that you’re going to be all mine,” he gives an evil laugh, “all mine….”

In one quick sweep he picks me
up and puts me on the work surface before heading for the fridge, opening the
door he mutters something about it being nearly empty.

“Groceries being delivered
today, this morning!” I defend myself, “Including four punnets of
strawberries!”

“Only four?” He frowns at me.

“Yes, James only four. We can
always get more, if you need them!” I’ll never get my head around this
strawberry fetish!

“Four won’t last long!” He
whinges.

He returns to me with a pot of
yoghurt, his precious strawberries, or what’s left of the few that were in the
fridge. He swills the fruit under the tap before placing them on kitchen towel
to dry off the excess water, then opens the yoghurt pot and reaches for a bowl
and small knife which he uses to chop the strawberries into slices and pours
the yoghurt over. He reaches for a spoon and scoops up a spoonful of what he’s
just made.

“Open.” He says.

I do and he feeds me, the fresh
taste of the yoghurt cleanses my pallet.

“I thought there was only one
way to eat strawberries?” I ask.

“Umm, you’re right, that’s the
best way, but we’ve only got a few, and no cereal and no champagne, so we’ll
have to make do with yoghurt, won’t we!” He nods emphasising his words as he
feeds me.

He puts the bowl down after
taking a spoonful of the thrown together breakfast for himself. He puts the
kettle on, “Tea?”

“Please, I’ll have another.”
It’ll be my fifth since four this morning, I’ll be on the loo all day at this
rate!

While the kettle boils he walks
back to me sat on the counter and stands between my legs, wrapping his arms
around me, leaning forward he kisses me deeply, “I meant every word I said last
night baby.” He growls to my neck.

“Ummm. I love you too!” I gasp
at his neck.

“When can we get married Alex?”
Oh, so the pressures starting already! The question I was dreading, hoping that
he might slow down a little now that he’d popped the question.

“I can’t even think about it
until I’m divorced. I should be free for middle of October,
providing
that Lewis doesn’t mess me around. All he’s got to do is question one thing,
demand more information, anything like that and it will delay the whole
process.” I look down, feeling a little sad at the fact that Lewis, the
bastard, could destroy everything I now have with one question, one query.

“So we can’t even plan until you
get your final papers.” He mutters as he turns to make the tea.

“No. And, well I’m sorry James
I’m not going to tempt fate by even starting to plan.”

“I understand.” He mutters.

“Really?” I say softly, because
in my heart of hearts I know that he wants to move on with this, he’s
impatient.

“Yes, really. I do. We can still
get engaged though?” He says brightly.

I think before I answer, “I
don’t think it would be right to advertise an engagement while I’m still
legally married but, we could do it privately, you know just not tell anyone,
well apart from Roberto, Gia and Anna.”

“Great! Oh, I love you,” he
sweeps me up in his arms again, “What have you got planned today?”

“I need to call Shauna, now that
this
has happened I want to make sure that everything is on track for
the “absolute” to be issued by the middle of October. I have an appointment
with my therapist just before lunch and I want to call Anna. She’s back on
Saturday remember? Her flight comes in at twelve. Do you think you can nab the
Mercedes and drive me to pick her up, I didn’t want to take Archie, I it want
to be private – you know, I haven’t seen her for two weeks!” I run my fingers
across his shoulders as I speak.

“Of course, of course I can
Blossom. Anything for you, absolutely anything!” I think if I asked for the
Hope Diamond right now he’d make efforts to get it!

Hell, I pinch myself again, is
this really, really happening?

“I need to shower.” Picking his
mug up he heads off upstairs. I tidy the kitchen, although there’s not much
that needs doing, I’m only making work for myself. I check the time again,
Muriel should be here in about an hour, assuming she’s well today and not
shopping!

Once I’ve done what I need to I
had upstairs as James is getting out of the shower. He’s standing with his back
to me as I walk into my bathroom, a towel wrapped around his narrow hips, his
shoulders so very broad, not an ounce of fat on him, unlike Lewis
the fat
bastard
. I watch him as he runs his fingers though his curls, I love those
curls, I love everything about him, even the imperfections, not that there are
many. I even love his love of bloody strawberries!

He walks into our bedroom and
sorts through his shirts, of course it’s a sea of white punctuated by the odd
colour, but it has to be ninety-eight per cent white in there, he pulls out a
pair of black trousers and his black Chelsea boots, next come the black boxers
and black socks. He dresses quickly finishing with his new Union Jack cufflinks
that I bought him yesterday.

“What do you think?” He flashes
his new cufflinks at me.

“They look great, but you know
James, you’d look great in just about anything.” I flatter him.

“So do you!” He says seriously.

I huff, “No, but you’ve got an
amazing body. I’ve never seen you exercise or heard you talk about it.” There’s
still so much I don’t know about him, and I don’t agree with him, I wouldn’t
look great in
anything
, I can’t show my back for a start!

“That’s ‘cause I haven’t for the
last couple of months, since I met you! I used to go with Roger after work, but
well, I’d rather come home now.” He looks at his double cuffs, adjusting them
so they’re perfect.

“Don’t give it up for me,
please! Carry on, I won’t mind, so long as you
do
come home!” I lean on
the door frame, just watching him.

He smiles, “I need to go, I have
to get the Audi back.” He starts to move towards the bedroom door.

“Will you talk to Robbie today,
about the General Manager Job,
please?
” I beg.

“Alex, you made me the happiest
man alive last night – I’ll do anything, and I mean
anything
you want,”
He comes over to me and kisses me gently, “and I mean
anything
.”

I hug him tightly. “I’ll call
you when I’m finished with the therapist.”

“You want Archie to take you? I can
send him around.”

“No, no – it’s private. I’ll get
a cab, you’re the only one that knows I’m going, I don’t want anyone else to
know!” I snap.

“Okay, okay.” He holds his hands
up, “ I’ll see you at lunchtime, maybe we can eat at the hotel?”

I look him, “Umm, maybe. I call
you.” I

He kisses me lightly on the
cheek and he’s gone, leaving me in my robe.

I tidy our room, pull our bed
straight and then think about getting ready myself. I turn the shower on a
leave it to warm up returning to our room I pull out some simple ankle grazers
and a blouse for today then go back to the bathroom where I shower quickly
before drying and dressing for the day, I apply a little make up, no need for
much today and as I finish I hear the front door shut and a “Hello!” shouted
from Muriel. So, she’s back.

I finish what I need to do
before I go down to meet her. The instant I see her I assure myself that I
did
see her in town yesterday, there is absolutely no doubt about it, but why lie
and say she was ill when she could have just asked for the day off, I wouldn’t
have minded. Do I challenge her? Tell her I that I saw her or just let this one
go?

“Morning Muriel. Feeling
better?” I play along with her obvious deception.

“I’m much better thank you, just
a tummy upset I think.” She holds her hand to her stomach as if to emphasise
where the problem was.

I bet
, I think to myself,
so bad that you were able to walk around central London.

“Would you like some tea Pet?”
She asks as she puts the kettle on, “Is there anything in particular you want
me to do today?”

“No tea for me thanks, I’ve had
enough already. There’s just the ironing, I’ve done the laundry from our trip,
seemed pointless waiting for you to come back when I could do it myself. It’s
all stacked in the utility room.” I flap my hand towards the utility room.

“Umm.” She sounds a little
miffed, I’m unsure if it’s because I’ve left her the tedious job or because
I’ve done laundry for her. “Okay
fine
,” she sounds “off”
,
not her
usual bright self, almost like she’s unhappy with me!

I look at her before wandering
through to my study, a room I rarely use because, well to be quite honest I
don’t like it but it gives me a little privacy whilst I call Shauna. Picking up
my mobile I search for her number and hit the call button. I’m answered quickly
by one of the girls in the office, I often wonder if it’s one of Tom Chandler’s
team that answers. I’m dragged from my thoughts by Shauna as she enthuses down
the phone.

“Morning Mrs. Drake, how are
you?” She sounds very happy, maybe she got it as good as I did last night?
“What can I do for you?”

“Oh, just wanting to see how
things are going? I’m keen that we’re all finalised by mid-October, to my
reckoning that should be about eight weeks after the Decree Nisi, it shouldn’t
drag on any longer, should it?”

 “No, this should be as per
the standard procedure, there’s no queries raised, yet, so we’re going for the
six weeks. Once we’re at six weeks and one day from the issue of the Decree
Nisi, which we have, we can apply for your absolute, then it’s just a rubber
stamp you are legally divorced but you
will
need the Decree Absolute to
be able to get married again and to prove your divorce for anything else you
might need to do. The only things that can slow it down now are if Lewis starts
raising queries, which as of this morning he hasn’t.” She explains, I know how
it works I just want to be sure that Lewis doesn’t create any problems.