Light Beyond the Darkness (27 page)

Carley hesitated. “She’s just like me,” she said, finally. “She needs the light.”

“That seasonal disorder?” Roman said with a nod. “We’re already used to working in an overbright kitchen.” He shrugged. “Maybe she and Sean and me will all head down to Mexico and start a new life.”

Carley thought that wasn’t such a bad idea. Roman would be closer to his estranged family, and she suspected that so long as they were together, Mica and Sean would be happy anywhere.

Roman dug a key ring out of his pocket and held it out before him. She blinked. “You have a car?”

“An old piece of shit truck that I keep in storage two blocks over. The only time I ever use it is when somebody calls and says they need help moving.” He thrust his hand at her. “Take it. My gift to you.”

“But why?”

Roman shrugged again. “You made me realize that the world is made up of more than any of us can even fathom,” he said cryptically.

“Oh.” Her throat constricted. She was going to cry, but it wasn’t about Miguel or even Reid. It was about the unconditional friendship that this one human man offered.

“I’ll never forget you, Roman,” she whispered, and then she pulled him into a fierce bear hug. When she released him, his face was pink and his eyes were misty, too.

“If Reid won’t see reason, maybe you should come back. You and me, we’ll really do it. We’ll go down to Mexico and live. Okay?”

She gave him a watery smile. “Okay. Thanks, Roman. For everything.”

And then she was gone, running through the sleet and rain, splashing icy water everywhere, ignoring the wetness on her face as she kept a diligent eye out for her one and only enemy: her mate.

But Miguel didn’t show his scalded face, and Carley made it to the garage where Roman stored his truck without incident, and soon she was behind the wheel, trying to remember everything Reid told her about driving, as she clumsily pulled out of the structure and guided the truck toward Reid’s apartment building.

When she arrived, she pulled the ancient truck to the curb, twisted the key to stop the engine and leaped out onto the sidewalk.

A human wearing a sharply pressed uniform stopped her before she could rush inside. “You can’t leave that truck here, ma’am,” he said. His voice was even but she could tell by the look in his eye that the old truck bothered his high-class sensibilities.

When she felt the urge to laugh at the notion—she cooked for kings, and he thought she was beneath him?—she realized she was holding onto her sanity by only a thin thread. She needed to get to Reid. She needed to ensure he was okay, he was alive. She needed to warn him about Miguel, and beg him for his forgiveness.

Her original plan had been to go straight to the coterie, and maybe if Mica had gone with her she would have done that. But left to her own devices, she had not been able to resist coming here, to Reid’s apartment.

She did not know if he would speak to her, but she knew she had to try. She had to warn him, if nothing else. He would probably scoff at her for the warning—shifters did tend to believe they were at the top of the magical food chain, and Reid no doubt was confident he could beat Miguel in battle—but she still felt the need to say something.

If he gave her the chance, she would tell him she loved him, too. Despite the fact that she was mated to another, she loved Reid. She loved everything about him, and she wanted to tell him that he really was perfect and whatever female was lucky enough to win his heart, she would be the luckiest female in any world. Carley knew that female was not her—she already had a mate, unfortunately—and that hurt so badly that just thinking about it made her want to cry. But she still needed to tell Reid. She wanted him to know.

Carley focused on the attendant, who stood on the sidewalk holding an umbrella and looking down his nose at her. Since joining the human world, the only time she used her magic was in the kitchen, and then only to ensure her dishes were fabulous. Considering the hours she worked at the restaurant, she had precious little magical stores anyway.

Today was different. Today, she was desperate and more frightened than she had been since she left the coterie five months ago.

She waved her hand in front of the attendant’s face, pulling on her magic as she did so. His eyes glazed over and he blinked blankly.

“When I come back,” she said, “my truck will be here waiting.”

“Yes,” the attendant said in a vague voice.

Satisfied that her magic was working, Carley turned and hurried into the building.

He wasn’t there.

After making a quick perusal of the place to ensure he really was not there, Carley stood in the middle of the glossy granite and wood kitchen, staring at the island where all the supplies Reid had purchased for their cooking lesson still remained. She thought about the day he walked into her restaurant and the subsequent month, during which he very deliberately courted her.

She thought about the cooking lesson and how she’d boldly asked him to kiss her. How that kiss had led to so many other pleasurable activities. Her body warmed at the memories.

Memories were all she had now. While she had no intention of going back to Miguel, she knew she could not be with Reid either, not now that he knew she was mated to another. She figured for the rest of her life she would be alone. She took a small solace in the knowledge that Reid had taught her that sex was not something to be endured. It was something to enjoy, to revel in. Something wonderful and special, shared by two beings who cared for one another.

At least she had that.

It took two days to get to the coterie. She barely knew how to drive, and became terribly lost. Then she ran the truck out of gas and had to wait for a helpful human to come along and explain what happened, and give her enough fuel to get to the nearest gas station.

The storm raged that entire first day, sapping what little strength she had. By dusk, she could barely keep her eyes open, so she finally pulled over and spent the night in a motel.

The next day was still overcast, but the storm had relented overnight, and the day was marginally brighter than the one before. After consulting a map at a rest stop, Carley finally determined the correct direction to the coterie and headed on her way. She arrived at nightfall. Luckily, the guard on duty recognized her and allowed her through the wards. Otherwise, she had no idea what she would have done.

She guided the truck up to the pole barn, left it parked there, and dragged herself wearily up to the front door of the beach house. She pushed the doorbell, and Tanner opened the door, greeting her with a stony look. Why in the world was
he
angry with her?

“Hello, Tanner,” she said hesitantly. “I—I’ve come back. I need—” What did she need? She needed Reid, but she doubted Tanner would understand. Nor would he be able to help in that endeavor. She sagged against the doorframe.

Tanner pursed his lips and scooped her into his arms and carried her inside. Ignoring her protests, he carried her upstairs and deposited her in the same guest room she’d used last week.

“You’re exhausted,” he said. “Sleep. You can explain in the morning. Nearly everyone else is asleep anyway. The storm has left everyone fairly weak. Good-night.” He turned and left the room, closing the door behind him. Carley kicked off her shoes, climbed under the covers and did just what he said: she fell instantly asleep.

*

Reid didn’t act on his initial thought, the urge to return to Wyoming to try to claim the right of pack master. Nor did he tell his brother about that idea. Finn would probably kick his ass on principal. Besides, now that he’d put distance between himself and Carley, the need to fight, the kamikaze attitude had dissipated.

Now, all he wanted to do was find Miguel, to punish him for what he did to Carley. He was still angry with her for lying to him, wasn’t sure he could ever forgive her, yet he still felt a burning need to be her champion, to take care of her problems for her. Otherwise, she would live in fear for the rest of her life, and no one deserved that.

He, Finn, and Jake had spent the day searching for Miguel. While they didn’t find the lightbearer, it hadn’t taken long to find his hiding place, in the woods, not two hundred yards from the beach house. Jake helpfully explained that the reason they hadn’t found it until now was because Miguel had warded it against detection. But the wards had to be renewed regularly, and he hadn’t done so recently.

Which meant he had no intention of returning. Reid wondered if that meant he had run away for good this time. What else could it mean?

Tanner had gone into a rage, furious with the guards for allowing such a dangerous being to live so close to his mate and her family for so many months.

But everyone had assumed the Chosen One’s followers either left the coterie or came groveling to the king for forgiveness. It never occurred to anyone that one of them would simply hide out in the woods for all these months.

“What was he waiting for?” Tanner wondered, after he’d gotten over his tirade.

“Carley,” Reid replied with absolute conviction.

“They’re mated, after all.”

It was like a damned song, stuck on repeat in his head. He couldn’t stop thinking about the words Mica had uttered.

After they’d returned from searching for Miguel, he admitted to Tanner and Finn that he knew Carley was mated. Finn blustered an apology, which made Reid angry all over again. Everyone knew except him. Fates, he felt like ten times a fool. He should sign off women for good. They were nothing but trouble. Miserable, terrible, horrible trouble. It wasn’t even worth the mind-blowing sex.

Was it?

“I didn’t know her that well,” Finn explained. “She’s distantly related to Cecilia, but they weren’t close. Cecilia’s family’s pretty fucked-up. Not exactly friendly with one another.”

Cecilia explained further. “Her parents are just like mine were. Miserable people who always view the world as a glass that’s half-empty. I don’t think they ever intended to have children, and Carley was an unwanted surprise. I was too young to comprehend it at the time. At least my parents always dumped me off on my other aunt and uncle, the king and queen, so I had that love to sustain me. But Carley had no one.”

Reid fought the natural inclination to feel sorry for a woman who grew up in a loveless household. “She had her mate,” he ground out through gritted teeth.

Cecilia gave him a thoughtful look. “Sometimes, things happen here in the coterie. They aren’t exactly right, but it happens nonetheless.”

“What the hell does that mean?”

“Hers wasn’t a love match. Far from it. In fact, if the rumors hold even a grain of truth, Carley’s parents paid a substantial debt for Miguel, in exchange for him taking her to mate.”

She’d glanced at Tanner at that point, and then explained further, for Reid’s benefit. “Olivia was once betrothed to Dane, not because she wanted to be, but because her parents thought he would give her healthy babes, an heir to the kingdom. We don’t always get to make the choice, if our parents determine they know better than we do.”

“She didn’t have a say? Not at all?”

Cecilia shook her head and looked thoughtful. Then she leaped up and declared she needed to run an errand. Finn automatically stood as well, and insisted on going with her. Reid was left alone with Tanner, who up to that point had sat quietly, not contributing, but listening to the conversation.

“I’m sorry for what my father did to you,” he said after they left. “I suspect if he’d never…abused you, your perspective would be different right now.”

Reid turned away from the sympathy and guilt in that shifter’s eyes. “Does it matter? She’s still mated to another.”

* * * *

When Cecilia returned later that evening, she was fairly bursting with news. “I was right. They paid him to take her,” she announced unceremoniously. This announcement was made over dinner, with Reid, Tanner, Olivia, and Finn present. The king and queen had taken dinner down to the village, to Nona, who was still laid up in bed, recovering from her most recent fall. Tanner’s mother had taken dinner in the nursery, happy to babysit her grandpup while his parents enjoyed their quiet meal.

“Carley’s parents,” Cecilia explained patiently. “Miguel was heavily in debt and looking for a fast way out. Except it gets worse. Carley’s parents were also followers of the Chosen One, er, Cedric. They were apparently frustrated with her unwillingness to go to meetings, to believe like they did.”

“Just like your parents,” Finn interjected.

“I have such a screwed-up family. Anyway, Miguel needed money, fast, and they were tired of battling with Carley. So they paid his debt, he mated to their daughter, and she became his problem, instead of theirs.”

Reid felt his resolve to hate her weaken. She had suffered so much abuse, both mental and physical for, he suspected, most, if not her entire life. He hated even thinking this way, but he could almost see why she hadn’t told him about Miguel. Initially, she probably simply tried to pretend her past was gone, behind her, never to be thought of again. And when that past caught up with her, it was too late. She and Reid had been heavily involved in an affair. A serious affair.

A love affair.

Love. She probably never even believed in the emotion. She sure as hell wouldn’t have expected it to happen to her. He thought about how timid she’d been in the beginning, how long it took him to coax her into his bed. He felt guilty, but at the same time, a sense of pride that he’d shown her what she’d experienced was not the way it was supposed to be.

Sex. Love. They were meant to be enjoyed, shared with someone else. Someone you loved back.

Did she love him? Did it matter anymore? He couldn’t have her, not entirely, not fully. And here he’d been hesitant to ask her to mate because of his own issues. Shit, those scars on his back were hardly worth concerning himself over, given all she’d gone through.

* * * *

Later that evening, when most of the coterie was tucked away in their beds, Reid sat in an armchair in the living room of the cottage Finn and Cecilia shared. His brother sat on the couch perpendicular to him. They both had a glass in their hands, each half-full of amber liquid. Cecilia had retired to bed a short time ago, leaving the brothers alone to enjoy their bourbon.