Kairos (5 page)

“Don’t look away from me, Sulwen. You have nothing to be ashamed of. You affect me as much as I affect you.” He leans down and gently kisses my lips. It’s soft and gentle, like a whisper on my flesh. As he pulls back, he’s smiling again, and I can’t help but smile back.

“Will you have lunch with me?” he asks as he takes a step back and looks at the two dresses I just slung over my arm. He plucks them up and holds them out for inspection. His eyes light up on the purple dress. It’s a little skimpy for my taste, but it’s appropriate for beachwear.

“Do you like it?” I find myself seeking his approval, and at once I could kick myself in the knee for my stupidity. I have broken the first rule of dating known to women across the world. Never…ever…seek a man’s approval for anything. It just gives him the inane belief he can control you. And I don’t have the patience for a controlling boyfriend right now.

However, his next statement surprises me when his brows rise in question and he shakes his head and says, “Your expressions are like an open book. You’re so easy to read, and yet I find myself curious as to why you worry if I like it or not. Do you like it?”

“Yes, I do.” I answer bluntly because his bluntness is catching me off guard, and I find myself wanting to say that
yes
, I do care what he likes.
Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.
What is wrong with me? If I had a dollar for every time I have asked myself that very question in his presence, my savings account would be sitting pretty right now.

I proceed to the front of the store and wait my turn in line to pay for my dresses. Logan has followed me and stands patiently behind me as I lay them on the counter for the girl to ring up. When she tells me the total and I reach into my purse to grab my debit card, he swiftly hands her a black Amex card and sends me a sneaky grin.

“I was going to pay for those,” I huff. I’m trying to be mad at his macho self, but I find the action so sweet I can’t muster up any real anger at all. I’ve never had a man buy me clothes. Tommy was all for women’s liberation, and at times I think he used it as an excuse so he didn’t have to pay for anything.

I frown and shake off the memory of him and his worthless hide. I’ve got tall, blond, and gorgeous paying for my dresses and fucking me with his eyes every time I turn around. And it’s a heady feeling that I won’t relinquish just yet.

The clerk looks up and hands him his receipts, and her eyes are bulging from their sockets. She looks like she had an orgasm from the mere contact of his fingers as she placed his card and receipt in his hand. Shit on a stick…I know he’s drop-dead beautiful, but does she really have to ogle him like that?

Logan looks at me as we exit the store and grins knowingly. How the hell can he tell that girl made me jealous? And why am I jealous of a man who isn’t mine? I’ll bet he has a woman for every week of the month, and I’m just this week’s special. Well, I’ll not come off with it that easy. Besides, I’ve already got my orgasm, and I can hold out for a while if need be. Even though the thought makes me frown and shake my head. I hear his chuckle beside me and look up into his eyes.

“She was barely eighteen, if that, and you were shooting flames from your eyes. Stand down, tigress. All is well. My eyes are fully fixated on the prize before me.”

He places my hand in his as we stroll toward a sleek black sports car. It’s the one that picked him up from the store that night. It must belong to his friend, but I can’t imagine a friend loaning out a car this expensive. I look over at him and see him in a whole new light. Maybe if I could quit staring at his perfect face I would have noticed that his outfit probably cost more than my car.

He’s wearing some very expensive distressed blue jeans that cling to the lower part of his waist but don’t sag on his ass like the ones most guys wear. They fit him like they were designed just for his frame. His white shirt has a deep V with a logo over his heart from some brand I’ve never seen before. Probably upper crust—not Walmart or Target like I’m used to buying. His brown boots peek out from under his pants, and like the rest of him, they’re flashy. He looks very put together but with a hint of dishevelment. It’s almost like he’s saying looking that good isn’t hard at all. Humph, I wish!

“For your information I was not jealous. It was rude of her to ogle a customer so openly with a woman standing right beside him. And you were purchasing dresses for said woman. It wasn’t jealousy. It was irritation for her blatant disregard of common courtesy.”

He pushes a button on the key ring, the car beeps once, and then he opens the door for me.

This car is spectacular, and I get a thrill just looking at it. I can’t wait to hear the engine purr to life and feel it hug the curves of the road like it was meant to. I can’t mask the awe that overcomes me while looking at it. Logan pats me on the ass and chuckles at my expression.

“Are you going to stare at it or get in? I assure you it’s just a means of transportation and nothing more. It’s my friend Thad’s car, so don’t start thinking I’m trying to compensate for something.” He grins and shuts the door after I’m situated.

Compensating? Is he serious? I felt that behemoth bulge in his pants the other night. No one could be stupid enough to come to that conclusion after feeling his hard-on stretch his pants so tight I thought the zipper would bust. I had secretly hoped it would. Then I could have fondled him to my heart’s content. Good grief. I’m acting like a walking vagina ready and waiting for penetration. This is so not cool.

I fasten my seat belt and collect what is left of my dignity as he sits down and starts the car.

“What kind of car is this?”

“It’s an Aston Martin Vantage GT3. Not that I expect you to appreciate that, but it’s expensive, fast, and one of the sweetest rides I’ve ever driven. Thad has impeccable taste when it comes to vehicles.” The car purrs like a lazy lion as we pull out onto the road and head toward a line of restaurants.

“So what are you in the mood for? Italian, Asian, seafood, or something simple? You pick.” He changes the gears with effortless ease. I try to think of what I would like to eat but can’t think of anything in particular. So I rattle off the first thing that comes into view.

“Olive Garden sounds good. I love their salads,” I say with too much enthusiasm.

“Italian it is then.” He looks over at me and smiles his charming smile, and I melt into the black leather seat. His hair is tied back today in a loose ponytail, but strands have begun to fall out and frame his chiseled face. He reaches up and absently tucks a stray lock behind his ear, and the sight of those fingers, the thought of where they’ve been, make me blush. I turn my head and gaze at the passing cars.

“So tell me a little about yourself, Sulwen.” He takes a bite of salad and eyes me expectantly. I swallow a bite of bread, take a sip of my berry sangria, and decide I can do this. I can talk about myself without the overpowering urge to blush or run to the restroom.

“Well, there’s not really a whole lot to say. I’m a full-time student at ETSU. I graduate in the fall with a master’s in English. And my dream job is to be a published author. That about sums it up.” I grin and bat my eyelashes. Holy shit, did I really just bat my eyelashes at him? His broad grin confirms my fears. I’m shamelessly flirting with a man who has had his hand in my panties. And by the way, what did he do with those panties? I’m afraid to ask, so I put that question away for another time.

“You don’t like talking about yourself, do you?”

I shake my head and move my fork around my salad bowl.

“I’m finding you to be quite the conundrum, Miss Sulwen. However, I don’t think four sentences can sum up any person, much less one as intriguing as you.” He nods his head expectantly at me, so I continue.

I debate on whether or not to bring up the subject of how he knows my name, but decide to couch that right now since he seems completely at ease. Maybe if I just allow the dialogue to flow between us he’ll let it slip. I don’t want to come off as snarky and suspicious…even though I’m highly curious—so I acquiesce…this time, and allow him to set the tone for our conversation.

“Well…I like photography, music, and being outdoors when I’m not so into a book I can’t pull myself away. But I’m working on that. I’m a tad OCD, and it grieves me to no end to start a book and not finish it in the same day. I know, it’s silly, but I like to finish something I start, and books fall into that category as well. What about you, Logan? What are your hobbies or favorite pastimes?”

He shrugs his shoulders and seems uninterested in the topic. “Nothing much. I graduated with a degree in history, and now I find myself gainfully employed by museums and historical societies around the globe. I travel quite a bit, but only one place beckons me home, and that’s Scotland. I’m obviously not a native, but I’ve found the country to be the most beautiful I’ve seen throughout my traveling, and it was a rather easy decision to set up camp and buy a house there.” He sips his glass of red wine and pushes his now empty plate to the side.

“Have you ever traveled, Sulwen?”

I want to correct him and tell him my friends and family call me Sully, but I find that I like the way my name rolls off his smooth tongue. He says it with such sweetness that I can’t bear to hear him cut it short.

“Um…no. I’ve never traveled anywhere beyond the bordering states of Tennessee. My dad was sick for a long time, and I had to stay close by to help take care of him.” I pause at the mention of my father. It’s still hard to talk about him, and I can’t believe I just initiated a conversation about him. I clear my throat and take another sip of my wine to calm my nerves. I don’t want my emotions to take control; I don’t want to start crying on his shoulder like some lunatic.

We carry on with small talk while I finish off my soup and salad. Finally he motions to the waiter for our check. Thank goodness for small mercies.

The drive back to my car at Old Navy is quiet. I can tell he’s debating on a safe topic of discussion but also trying to get a feel for my mood. I shouldn’t have mentioned my father. It’s brought about an awkwardness that has yet to dissipate.

“I’d like to see you again. If that’s all right with you.” His sincere tone throws me back a bit. He seems to genuinely like me, and the thought is incredibly comforting. I smile shyly at him.

“I’d like that too.” He flashes me his megawatt smile, and I damn near clutch my chest to keep from gasping. We pull in beside my car, and I step out to unlock my door. He appears beside me and pulls the Old Navy bag with the dresses he bought for me from the floorboard of the car.

“Don’t want you to forget these. Especially that purple number. You’ll have to wear that on our date tomorrow night. I’m going to take you somewhere special.” He leans down and gives me a soft peck on the lips. “I’ll call you tomorrow. Be ready by seven.” I nod like a bobblehead doll on a dashboard, and his grin spreads to his eyes. He’s got such a warm and caring smile I can’t help but grin like a fool back.

“Bye, Logan.” I turn and get into my car and watch him drive away.

Chapter
Three

I
wake to my alarm clock blaring the morning news and traffic report throughout my room. I sit up and look at the time and realize I forgot to reset my alarm for later. It’s only seven thirty, and I am
not
a morning person, so I hit the snooze button and curl back up under my warm covers and start to drift off again.

“Sully! Sully! Wake up, girl!” There’s a loud banging on my door as I roll back over and look at my clock. Its ten o’clock, and Tonya is about to kick my door in.

“What the hell? I’m trying to sleep in here.” I drag my sorry behind up and pull on my sweat pants and groggily tread across to my door. I open it to find Tonya standing there dressed in black dress slacks and a silk button-down blouse. She looks like she’s going to a job interview, so I don’t question the formal attire, but I am not a happy camper to be roused early when I can sleep in.

She looks down at my crumpled tank top and up to my bedhead. “You forgot, didn’t you? Seriously, Sully, how could you forget this?” Her lips are drawn into a thin line, and for once she actually looks pissed.

What the hell have I forgotten? I rack my brain as I drag my hands down my face and rub the sleep from my eyes.

She finally relents and tells me. “Do the words ‘paid internship’ ring a bell?”

My mouth forms an O, and my eyes spring wide. Oh shit! How could I forget the internship interview with the vice president of her father’s company? With this job I could quit the Stop-N-Go Mart and say good riddance to potbellied drunks and creepy perverts hitting on me 24/7.

“Oh, hell. Give me thirty minutes, and I’ll be ready. Can you wait?”

She taps her foot and looks at her watch with agitation. “I guess, but you better not be a minute longer. My dad has really pulled some strings for us, and I don’t want to disappoint him.” She turns and heads down the stairs for the kitchen, where I know a fresh pot of coffee is brewing. I shut my door and strip my clothes off while running to my bathroom.

A ten-minute shower does wonders for the body. I pull my hair up into a ponytail and braid it and then wrap it around in a tight bun. I jerk on a cute lacy headband that looks professional with my black slacks and red button-down shirt. The shirt is clingy on my breasts, but I guess that’s why you don’t see big-busted girls wearing buttons of any kind. I’m not that endowed, so my girls fit snugly but comfortably behind my camisole, and I button the red lace blouse over it and look at myself in the mirror. I look older with my hair slicked back, but I must admit that the suit more than makes up for my lack of makeup and hair preparation. I pull on my black high heels and walk down the stairs while applying lip gloss and smudging some on my cheeks for color.

“Here. I made it just the way you like it.” She smiles at me and hands me the travel mug as we head out the door like nothing was ever wrong. That’s another quality I admire in my friend. She knows how to let the simple things go, and she never dwells on the negative. I’m a walking contradiction to her, but somehow we’ve made it work all these years.

I slide into the Jeep and fasten my seat belt. My phone beeps that I have a text message, so I dig it out of my purse and click the envelope button to display it.

From: Logan

I look forward to our date tonight. Wear something comfortable! See you at 7!

Dr. Logan Thatcher

Historical Archivist

Dr.? Where did that come from? I didn’t know he had a PhD. Mr. Thatcher is turning out to be a pleasant surprise. I send a confirmation reply and close my screen, only to find Tonya staring at me while she waits for the light to turn green.

“What? It was Logan confirming our plans for tonight.” I try to play coy, but she can see the excitement in my eyes, and she isn’t going to let the subject drop. The light turns green, and she’s once again forced to drive and ignore her impulse to delve into my inner thoughts. Dodged a bullet there.

Better to cool her jets before she fires them up. So I decide to tell her in full detail, hoping I can avoid an interrogation when I get home tonight. I release a wary sigh and spill the beans.

“I don’t know where he’s taking me, and I have no idea what his intentions are as far as a relationship goes. He’s not from here, so I’m assuming he’s here on business and looking for a little fun on the side. And yes, I plan on being that fun for as long as he’s here. You’re the one who told me I should live a little…Well, I plan on living a lot as soon as we’re alone and have a modicum of privacy.” There. Put that in your pipe and smoke it. I cast a victorious grin at her, and she smiles back conspiratorially.

“Sully, all I was going to ask was whether or not you plan on working this summer. I would like for us to spend some time together, but I refuse to play the third wheel, so I guess I’ll curl up and eat some Ben & Jerry’s tonight while I watch
The Notebook
with a fresh box of tissues.”

I know she’s only playing with me, but I can’t stand to think she’ll be all alone in that big house with nothing to do.

“Do you want me to stay home? I will if you want me to.” I’m hoping with all I have that she will say no, but if she doesn’t, I know I’ll cancel. I glance at her face, but she’s watching the road and chewing her bottom lip nervously as a tractor trailer blows by us and shakes the car in its wake.

“Are you insane? You had better not cancel this date. I want details, and I mean specific details. Also, if you get lucky, please stay the night. No need to come rushing home on my account.” She grins, and her eyes light up like a Christmas tree. “I want this to work for you, Sully. You deserve a good man. Tommy was a douche bag. You know I never liked him. Like I always say…never trust a man who won’t go down on you!” We both burst into a fit of laughter, and by the time we pull into the parking garage of her father’s pharmaceutical company, we’re wiping tears from our eyes.

I’m still collecting myself when the elevator stops on the fifth floor and opens up to Jerrod Becker’s office floor. The entire floor consists of his office, three meeting rooms, and three personal assistants busily typing away at their cubicles. There’s also a small lunchroom down the hall.

Mr. Becker has really come a long way since Tonya and I were kids. I have the utmost respect for him seeing as he’s a self-made millionaire. You wouldn’t know it by looking at him or Tonya. They don’t live in a massive mansion or drive million-dollar Italian sports cars. They live modestly and donate to charity to the point of excess.

As his secretary shows us into the meeting room next to his office, I see his salt-and-pepper head peek out the door to see who is in the hall. When he spots us, he smiles a heartwarming smile and closes the distance in a few steps. He pulls Tonya into a big bear hug and kisses her hairline like he did when she was little. Seeing the two of them together makes my heart ache with a pain so intense that I hold my breath to keep from sobbing. I quickly pull my phone from my purse and pretend to check messages.

They pass a few words in greeting, and then his dark brown eyes gaze upon me with fatherly affection. After all, he’s seen me at my worst and been there through loose teeth and broken arms, so I guess he’s entitled to feel somewhat parental toward me.

“Sully, how have you been, young lady?” He pulls me in for a quick hug and pats me affectionately on the back. I have a hard time with affection since my father passed. I don’t like for people to hug and dote on me; it’s just uncomfortable for everyone involved. I expel a deep breath and let my emotions subside.

“I’m doing good, Mr. Becker. How have you been?” He narrows his eyes as if he’s going to ask the dreaded question I hate to hear, but instead he turns and marches over to the big table and offers us a chair.

“I’m well. Thank you. Have you been keeping an eye out for our favorite girl?” He smiles at Tonya, and I nod back at him.

“Great. Well, let’s get down to business.” He pulls the head chair out and plops down unceremoniously. “I have two paid internships open for the summer. They’re yours if you ladies want them.

“Tonya, your position would be in research and development as a technician, and Sully, your position would be more clerical. I need someone who can type up speeches for benefit gatherings, work on some informational pamphlets, things of that nature. Are you interested?” He looks at me because he knows Tonya is dying to get her hands in that research lab.

She’s going to be the youngest in her graduating class for her PhD in biomedical science. Like father, like daughter. Their passion for science has provided us with countless tales of garage explosions and chemistry mishaps, and we must never forget the volcano they built for her seventh-grade science fair that blew its top and spewed spaghetti sauce all over the judging faculty.

Lost in my thoughts as I am, I’m completely unprepared for the question, and I stutter out a reply. “Yes, sir. Sounds good to me.” He smiles and nods his approval.

“All right, young ladies. I expect to see you both here bright and early Monday morning. Sully, please convey your resignation to the convenience store.” With that said he stands and embraces Tonya once more, and then he’s back in his office and we’re walking to the elevator.

We make our way to the elevator and press the G on the board to take us to the ground floor of the parking garage. I have no long-term plans with Mr. Becker’s company. This is merely a means to cover some tuition costs and feed me through the fall semester.

I have the money from my father’s life insurance and the sale of the house, but I’ve left that in savings for when I’m ready to buy a house and settle down. It’s also nice to know that if I really needed it, it would be there for the taking. That would have made my dad happy. He was always so worried about what was going to happen to me when he died.

As I dwell on it a little longer it finally occurs to me that maybe…just maybe, the real reason I’m reluctant to touch that money is because it’s all I really have left of him. Crazy…yes, I know. But, it leaves me with a sense of peace, knowing that a part of my dad is still around and able to take care of me.

We strap on our seat belts and head out of the parking garage.

“I’m so excited!” Tonya says. “I cannot wait to get into that lab and become a part of medical history. My dad is on the verge of a pharmaceutical breakthrough, and I want to be his lead researcher. Can you imagine? We could be on CNN. I might even get to meet Anderson Cooper.” She is practically bouncing in her seat. This is her dream job, and she’s finally arrived. Even though she doesn’t graduate for another semester, the job is essentially hers. This isn’t an internship for her. This is her introduction into the family business, and she has every reason to be ecstatic. I smile at her unbridled enthusiasm. Her good mood is catching, and my sorrowful thoughts slowly seep away.

“Sully, your date is here,” Tonya yells up the stairs to me. She’s already ensconced herself on the couch with a tub of mocha chocolate ice cream, and her movie is about to start. I breeze down the steps and past the kitchen to the powder room. One last look in the mirror tells me that my comfortable but sexy attire is passable. I’m wearing black capri shorts, a white crepe blouse with roll-up sleeves, and the cutest animal print t-strap sandals ever. I have even painted my toenails with my French manicure kit.

I hope we aren’t going walking. These shoes would be totally inappropriate for a hike. I guess I’ll find out in a minute. I take one last look at my hair, which is braided in a fishbone that starts at my left temple and stops behind my right ear, the ends curled and lying softly over my right shoulder. I’ve managed to pull a few wispy tendrils loose around my temples so that it doesn’t look stiff and unnatural. My makeup is minimal, and lip gloss is really the only thing that stands out. I hurry back out to the doorway and grab my purse.

“How do I look?” I spin in a circle, giving her the 360-degree view.

“You look hot! Go get ya some of that meat muffin. Here, take these.” She pulls out two condoms from her pocket, and I walk over to collect them.

“Seriously? You did not just pull condoms from your fleece PJ’s pocket?!” I’m trying not to laugh, but she is shameless in her attempt to get me laid.

“Of course I did! I want you to get some Sully, not catch something bleach can’t wash off. Now for goodness’ sake, quit making the poor guy wait out in the heat.” She presses play on the DVD player, and Ryan Gosling appears on the screen, shirtless and sweaty. I’m pretty certain she’s fast-forwarding to the parts with male nudity. Maybe I should buy her a Magic Dolphin. The thought makes me smile as I step outside into the May heat.

“What’s so funny?” His voice always reminds me of melted chocolate, the way it flows from his mouth and raises goose bumps on my skin. He’s leaning against the hood of a black Range Rover, and he looks absolutely divine. He’s wearing khaki cargo shorts with a short-sleeve button-down shirt. It’s not tucked in, and the top two buttons have been left open to reveal his tan skin. Once again his style is relaxed but sexy as hell. I glance down and notice he’s wearing white flip-flops. Good—no hiking shoes required.