House Of Secrets (15 page)

“You what?” I was taken by surprise. I’d never quit a project before and I hadn’t asked to have this one taken off my hands.

“I just figured with all that you’re going through . . . well . . . you need some time to focus on the problems at hand. I know work is important, and believe me, I have another dozen projects lined up and waiting if you really need to work. It’s your call, but I needed to turn this one around quickly, and I didn’t want you stressing over it.”

A part of me wanted to be angry that he’d acted without talking to me, but at the same time I was really glad he had been thoughtful enough to think of it. I took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “Thank you. I think you’re right. I need the time.”

He nodded. “I’m glad you agree. I was afraid you would be angry.”

“Yes, well I suppose that would have been my original choice.” I smiled. “I find anger balances me when I feel control stripped away.”

“Maybe you should try prayer instead,” he said with a grin. “It leaves you with less to apologize for.”

Our server came just then and offered us the house dessert, but we declined. I couldn’t have eaten another bite if my life depended on it, and Mark seemed more than a little tired.

“We should head over to the ferry.” I glanced at my watch. “It’s getting close to the next departure for Bremerton.”

Mark insisted on paying the bill, and for once I didn’t have even the slightest interest in arguing. We walked back to where I’d parked. Mark gallantly took the remote and opened my door for me. Handing me back the keys, he grinned.

“I’d offer to drive, but I’d probably end up in Canada.”

His comment made me smile. “Seattle traffic and streets aren’t anywhere near as bad as Boston, much less New York City.”

“That’s why I always take a cab.” He winked and closed the door after I took my seat behind the wheel.

I knew it was a dangerous game I was playing. I was fairly certain I’d already lost my heart to this man, and if I wasn’t careful he’d soon have my mind and soul as well. I stiffened and put the car in gear. I instantly became very aware of the man beside me.

Soon we were in line for the ferry and enjoying some classical music on the radio as we waited. The car began to feel very small and I wondered why in the world I had agreed to his visit. Mark would want to point to God as the answer for everything, and if I openly trusted him with the dark truths in my past, there was a good chance I could lose his friendship.

“You’re uncomfortable.” His words came out of nowhere.

I nodded. “I suppose I am.”

“Why?”

I gave a nervous laugh. “Why do you suppose? This isn’t exactly something I do all the time.”

“What? Get together with friends?”

“Yes.”

He considered this for a moment. “Don’t you have many friends?”

“No. I’ve not allowed myself that luxury.”

“Why not?”

I looked at him. “Don’t you remember? I’m the one whose life is a mess.” I couldn’t believe I’d had that breakdown with him on the phone. “Look, I’m sorry I got so emotional. Things were just . . . well . . . hard.”

“I’m sorry they were hard, but not sorry that you reached out to me. Good grief, Bailee, I’ve been reaching out to you for so long I was beginning to despair of it doing any good. I’m glad you wanted me to come here. It saved me from turning into a stalker.” He grinned and I couldn’t help but smile. I could just imagine him sneaking around the trees—hiding and watching me from afar. I frowned as I realized he was watching me.

“Please don’t put the wall back up,” he added in a low, tender tone.

I thought about what it would mean to our relationship if I agreed. I hadn’t allowed myself a close friend in . . . well . . . ever. My sisters were my only real relationships, and right now we weren’t doing that well. I needed what Mark was offering, but it was hard to admit it—even to myself.

“I’m afraid,” I finally said.

“I know.” He reached over and gently took hold of my hand. “But you don’t have to be. I won’t hurt you.”

My eyes narrowed. “How can you promise such a thing? Everyone gets hurt, and at one time or another everyone hurts someone. I don’t want you trying to make me feel better with lies or promises you can’t keep.”

He nodded. “All right, how about this. I won’t set out to hurt you, and I’ll do my best to treat you with the respect and love you deserve.”

Love? Had he really just casually mentioned love as if it were nothing more than a comment on the weather? My gaze fixed on to where his hand was touching mine. Things were moving awfully fast—weren’t they?

I looked back up and found him watching me. He smiled again and I felt my heart actually skip a beat. “You won’t regret this,” he told me.

“But you may,” I said.

The blast of a car horn behind me interrupted any comment he might have given. I yanked my hand away and looked around like a naughty child caught stealing. They were loading, and I hadn’t paid attention to the line. I put the car in gear and pulled onto the ferry.

“I’m going to find the restroom,” I said, shutting off the engine. I was gone before he could reply, and had I been a woman of prayer, I would have prayed that Mark would never know how much he’d stirred my heart. I would have prayed that he would never realize the longing and need he’d awakened in me.

But from the look in his eyes, I already knew better. I just didn’t know what to do about it.

D
ad, this is Mark Delahunt. His grandfather and father own the publishing company I work for, and he’s my—”

“Friend,” Mark interrupted, thrusting his right hand toward my father.

My sisters exchanged glances.

Dad shook his hand. “Good to meet you, Mark. Call me Tony. This is my wife, Judith.”

Mark smiled at Judith and shook her hand as well. “I’m pleased to meet both of you.”

“What brings you out to Washington, Mark?” Judith asked.

“I had hoped to see Bailee in a more relaxed atmosphere,” he told them. He threw me a smile, then continued. “Work allows us very little time to get to know each other better.”

“How nice. Tony and I have worked together for a long time. I know how that can be.” She smiled at my dad. “Had I not instigated some quality time away from the office, we might never have married.”

Mark laughed and gave me a wink. “See, I knew I’d like these folks.”

“Where are you staying?” My dad’s question caused me to realize I hadn’t even suggested to Mark that he could stay there with us.

“I have reservations at a hotel near the ferry.”

“Oh, nonsense,” Dad said. “We have a cottage at the top of the drive. You must have seen it when you came in. Anyway, there are two bedrooms—one downstairs and one up. You can take the upstairs room if you’d like. It opens into the house and also has a separate entrance outside. We often rent the cottage as two units to summer tourists.”

“Sounds perfect,” Mark replied. He looked at me as if awaiting my approval.

I thought to protest and tell them that he could have my room, but figured this would be the better solution. “Dad’s right,” I agreed. “There’s plenty of space.”

“Well, if you’re sure it won’t inconvenience anyone,” Mark said.

“I’d have you stay here,” Dad added. “There is a master bedroom on the first floor, but it needs cleaning and some work. Besides, it doesn’t really seem appropriate to have you here with my daughters. I’m a little old-fashioned in my thinking.”

I was surprised after Dad’s insistence for years that the room be off-limits that he’d even consider offering it to Mark. Maybe it was a sign that he was finally able to let go of the past and his memories of Mom. Maybe it was time for all of us to do the same.

“I completely understand,” Mark said without the slightest hint of protest. “I’m a little old-fashioned myself. Say, I have a shirt similar to yours only in green.”

Completely taken by surprise at his comment, I looked quickly to Dad’s shirt.
PSALM 103 PRAISE
was clearly embroidered on the upper left pocket of the polo top.

“So you’re familiar with their ministry?” Dad asked.

Mark nodded. “I attended their East Coast seminar last April. Great stuff. Learned a lot.”

I decided if there was to be a secret handshake or other strange ritual, I was leaving the room. Fortunately, Dad only nodded in agreement.

“I plan to get involved with starting a local chapter,” Dad said.

“I wish I could do the same,” Mark said.

Dad seemed aware that the topic wasn’t of interest to me or my sisters and changed the subject. “We can talk about it later—it’s getting late. Why don’t you come with me and get settled in at the cottage. Tomorrow Bailee can give you the guided tour of the area.”

He acted as though I had only been away from the area for a few months rather than fifteen years. Nevertheless, I nodded obediently and watched as Judith and Dad led Mark away after bidding us all good-night.

Piper and Geena looked at me expectantly. I wasn’t at all sure what to tell them, though. Should I mention my breakdown on the beach? Should I tell them that Mark offered to come and support me at a time when I felt everyone else had deserted me?

“We have projects to talk about,” I lied. “He thought it would be easier in person.”

“How long is he staying?” Geena asked.

I hadn’t even thought to ask. “Mark didn’t say, but I can’t imagine it will be long.” At least that much was true. I figured that at best he might be here two or three days. Anything more than that would create a bind at the office, and I knew he hadn’t had time to really cover his duties with additional staff.

“It won’t really give us any privacy to talk,” Piper declared.

I looked at her for a moment. “I didn’t figure you were talking to me anyway.”

“Oh, you know that’s not true. Just because I’m angry and hurt doesn’t mean I won’t talk to you.” She turned to Geena. “Besides, Geena’s helped me to better understand your situation. I never really knew how much Mom demanded of you.”

I was surprised and actually rather touched by Geena’s endeavor to explain my position. “It’s amazing that a person could be dead for over fifteen years and still have such control over one family.”

We wandered into the living room as if by agreement. Lights from houses along the sound dotted the landscape like diamonds against dark velvet. The moon hadn’t come up yet, but the stars were vivid in the sky.

“Why was she so hard on you?” Piper asked.

Her question took me by surprise. I turned away from the window and came back to where they were standing. “I suppose because I was the firstborn.” It seemed the only logical answer. I thought about my mother for a moment. “Momma knew how much I wanted to please her. I lived for her approval. I suppose she sensed that and capitalized on it.”

Piper gave a nod. “That would make sense. I’m sorry I blamed you.” She seemed rather embarrassed, so I gave her a smile.

“It would seem that despite my desire to keep you and Geena safe and free from hurt, I only managed to add to it. I’m the one who’s sorry.”

Geena shoved her hands deep into her jeans and narrowed her gaze. “Sometimes it feels like we’ll never really understand the past. For all we’ve learned in the last few days, it’s only served to complicate matters more. I keep thinking to put the past behind me, but it keeps springing to life. Are there any other secrets we should know about?”

I considered her question for a moment. Were there other secrets that I should explain? Wasn’t that the very question I had for myself? Were there other secrets? Things I could no longer remember. Things so confidential that I buried them away and forgot them?

She looked at me oddly. I shrugged. “I don’t know. I keep thinking about that. Knowing about mom’s schizophrenia was the one big thing I was keeping from you. The rest have been Dad’s secrets. Maybe he’s the one we should ask.”

“Maybe we don’t want to know.”

Geena and I looked at Piper. Her comment put into words what I supposed we all were thinking.

“Keeping the truth from us all these years hasn’t served any good purpose,” Geena said. “Our mother committed suicide when we thought our father had murdered her. Knowing that sooner would have changed things—at least for me. Still, it’s hard to understand why she was allowed to take her own life in such a manner. If that happened today, there would be all sorts of investigations and lawsuits.”

“Not to say there weren’t fifteen years ago,” I added.

“No, I suppose not.” Geena gave a shrug. “I’d like to know if Dad pursued it at all. Maybe he felt it was all his fault, but the fact that the hospital neglected to keep Mom safe is a big deal.”

“So what?” Piper countered, her voice edged with anger. “What does it matter? It won’t bring Mom back and it can’t buy us peace of mind. What good does it do to torment Dad for answers about the past?”

Piper was back to feeling protective of our father. It didn’t surprise me. He was the only parent she’d really known, and like most things in life, Piper seemed to run hot and cold in her emotions.

The next day, I was surprised when Dad, Judith, and Mark all walked into the house. Dad sniffed at the air and smiled.

“Smells good in here.”

“I’m making French toast,” I told him. “There’s already some on the table if you’re hungry.”

Judith came into the kitchen. “Can I help?”

I nodded. “You can get the juice out of the fridge and onto the table.”

“What about me?” Mark asked.

Since he was away from the office, he had ditched the suit and tie and was wearing a pair of khakis with a blue pullover shirt. The blue really complemented his eyes, and I couldn’t deny how good he looked. He threw me a smile as if he knew what I was thinking.

“I think . . . we have it,” I managed. Turning back to the stove, I flipped the French toast and reached for a plate. “I’ll have this batch on the table in a minute.”

Geena and Piper ambled in just as I finished up the last few pieces. We gathered like a regular family at the breakfast table. Dad said grace and before I knew it we were chatting about plans for the day.

“This coffee is fantastic. Seattle’s Best, I suppose,” Mark stated more than questioned.

“Bremerton’s Best,” Geena corrected. “Or at least Cooper’s Best.”

Everyone laughed except Piper. She seemed in a dark mood. I noticed she wasn’t eating and wondered if she was feeling poorly. I started to ask, but Judith spoke up. “I’m going to do some painting down on the beach today. I’d love to have your company.” She looked at the three of us girls and added, “It would be great to get to know you better.”

I was glad for an excuse to opt out. “I promised to take Mark around.” I offered no other comment and instead turned my attention to the food.

“Where do you two plan to head out to?” Dad asked.

Mark looked to me for answers. “I guess we’ll play it by ear. I haven’t been here since I was twelve,” I reminded him.

“Take him to Poulsbo,” Dad suggested. “It’s a quaint little Scandinavian village on the north end of Liberty Bay. It’s got some great antique stores, and I know you like that kind of thing.” A faint memory came back to me. I had been there with my parents long ago.

“I like to browse antique stores too,” Mark said, much to my amazement. “I have fond memories of antiquing with my mother.”

“Well, you sound like a man after my own heart,” Dad declared. “I’ve got a collection of Old West memorabilia. Spurs, barbed wire, old tools. You’ll have to come see it sometime. I keep a lot of it in my office in Boston.”

“I’d like that,” Mark replied. “I can’t say that I know much about that kind of thing. My mom was quite fond of Haviland china and Limoges pieces. I can probably tell you more about that kind of thing than a man has a right to know.”

“I love Limoges,” Judith interjected. “I’ve got a set of china that dates back to the 1880s. It’s a delicate blue floral print with beautiful scalloping and gold trim.”

Mark nodded. “I’ve seen similar pieces gracing our table at home.”

“So you didn’t just have it to look at,” Judith commented. “That’s exactly how I feel about antiques. If you aren’t going to use them, what’s the point of having them? They’re only things, and if their only purpose is to gather dust . . . well . . . I don’t need that kind of object in my life.”

“I couldn’t agree more,” Mark said. “I want the things around me to have purpose and be of value. Utmost on that list, however, is to have people in my life.” He turned a smile on me and lifted up a forkful of French toast. “Especially ones who can cook.”

My cheeks grew hot, and I immediately grabbed my coffee to have something to do. I sipped at the brew for several minutes so that no one would expect me to comment. Mark had a way of making me feel so relaxed and nervous all at the same time.

We had covered a variety of casual topics by the time breakfast ended. Geena got to her feet first. “Piper and I can clean up since you fixed the food. That way you and Mark can get on the road.”

I looked at Mark. “Are you ready for a day among the Scandinavians?”

He laughed. “As long as you’re among their number.”

“You two have fun and don’t worry about us,” Judith said. “I have plans after painting to put together a nice dinner for everyone. I hope you don’t mind.”

“I’m always happy for someone else to cook,” Geena replied. “Come on, Piper. Let’s get these into the dishwasher.” She picked up several plates and headed to the kitchen.

Piper looked less than excited at the prospect, but picked up her own plate and cup. My eyes lingered, however, on all the food on her plate she’d barely touched.