Good Intentions (The Road to Hell Series, Book 1) (22 page)

Lifting her left hand, she held it before her and stared at it as if willing it to explode, or at least fire to life. “Traitor,” she said to it.

I quirked an eyebrow at the word but refrained from telling her to try harder again. I could feel the disappointment in her eyes, see it in the set of her shoulders. The fingers of her right hand dug deeper into the earth, trying to tap into something I couldn’t comprehend.

Much like her.

Kobal

“You’ve become more of a watchdog than your hounds.” Bale tossed back her flame-red hair as she stepped beside me.

“Of course I am,” I grated through my teeth. “She must be protected.”

Bale’s mouth pursed as her eyes ran over me before she lifted one slender shoulder in a delicate shrug. “I know that, but we are all capable of protecting her. You must take a break once in a while.”

I knew they were all almost as capable as I was, but I was the strongest of them, their leader. I had helped to train them for battle; I trusted any one of them with my life. Then why didn’t I trust any of them with River’s? No, I trusted them with her; I just didn’t like the idea of not being there to see her.

She had managed to slip out on me last night after all. She would definitely get past one of them if she chose to do so.

“Are you screwing her?” Bale inquired.

“No, she’s vital to the mission.”

Bale snorted. “So, you haven’t tried then?”

I didn’t bother to respond to her as I focused on the mass of humans swarming to get into line. I refused to leave River alone in this mess after the way they’d started to treat her. A frightened human was a dangerous thing, and they were definitely afraid of her. They were also jealous of her. It was a combination I worried would get her hurt.

Not to mention, I saw the way some of the men still watched her. Despite their fear of her, she was alluring and they would bed her if given the chance. I may not be able to have her, but I’d kill any one of them before I allowed them to take her.

“I thought so,” Bale continued. “It’s in our nature. We take what we want, but for once, deny yourself. Humans tend to put more value into sex than we do. It will only cause complications if you get mixed up with her.”

“It is none of your concern, and we will
not
be discussing it.”

She lifted an eyebrow and her jaw clenched, but she didn’t say another word. It was rare I didn’t want to hear what she or Corson had to say, but I would not discuss River with either of them right now.

River emerged from the crowd. She didn’t bother to glance at the tables around her. She kept her head held high as she wound through the people who hastily stepped away from her. Her step hesitated when she spotted us and her brow furrowed, but she continued forward.

“What are you doing here?” she demanded when she stopped before me.

“Hello to you too,” I greeted dryly while Bale grinned annoyingly.

River glanced between the two of us before brushing by me to walk out the door. I turned to follow her, glowering at any man who turned to watch her passing. A young solider blanched and turned quickly away when my lips skimmed back and I bared my teeth at him.

“What are you doing?” she hissed.

“Making sure you stay safe,” I replied.

She shot me a look over her shoulder. “I don’t need a guard dog, and part of the reason they don’t like me is because of what they consider your excessive attention to me.”

“And the fire shooting from your hands,” Bale pointed out. “They didn’t really like that much either.”

“And the fire,” River agreed with a roll of her eyes.

She walked over to a large tree and settled beneath it. Her back rested against the trunk as she unwrapped her sandwich. I found myself fascinated by the mundane movements she somehow managed to pull off with an easy grace most of her species lacked.

Is she more demon or angel?

She seemed to be such a perfect combination of the two species that I didn’t know which part could be stronger. Add in her humanity, which was something both demons and angels sorely lacked, and she was an enchanting combination I found irresistible. The angels were nearly as ruthless as we were from what I’d been told. They simply treated souls better than we did, but then they didn’t get the souls we received either. I’m sure they would have been more than happy to make Stalin’s eternity as excruciating as we had.

Are we simply the same as the angels, in different locations, and different surroundings?

The concept had never occurred to me before, but perhaps it was true. Neither side coveted what the other had. I couldn’t care less about ever seeing the fluffy clouds of Heaven, if there were clouds up there, just as I was sure they wouldn’t give a shit about the fiery pits that had given birth to me.

Though I was sure the new situation the humans had thrust upon Hell and Earth had all the angels in a fit. The planes had been upended, and the existence of all our species hung in the balance after all. If we lost, the balance would be forever altered, the flow of souls changed. Demons and angels alike would die as angels thrived on the purity of a soul as much as we thrived on its impurity. The flow had to remain consistent to sustain us all. We needed the human race.

How our fates became hinged on the shoulders of the dumbest and greediest of all our species was beyond me, but it was.

I stared at River as she ate her sandwich and watched the sunset over my shoulder. No, our species could hinge on
her
. And I believed she was someone who could do anything she set her mind to. I believed she was capable of far more than she realized.

One thing was for sure, no matter what she feared, she was nothing like her father. She never could be. I could sense the purity of her soul, the warmth she radiated from her. Lucifer was none of those things. I couldn’t imagine going back to a life without her. The prospect was so barren and bleak that for the first time in my life, I actually felt hollow inside.

Turning, I glanced at Bale who was watching us both from under her bright red lashes. Her gaze slid from River to me and back again. “Will I see you tonight?” Bale asked me.

River froze with her apple halfway to her mouth. “Perhaps,” I replied.

Bale bowed her head before turning and walking away. River bit into her apple before focusing on the sunset again. She didn’t speak, but a line marred her forehead.

“We’ll work on having you draw on the pulse of life again tomorrow,” I told her as I settled beside her on the grass.

“I had no doubt,” she muttered. “But if you don’t know how to bring it out and neither do I, it could prove to be useless.”

“We’ll return to your regular training tomorrow too, just in case, and we’ll add this in at another time.”

Her eyes flashed when they slid to me. “Where will we add it in?”

“In the morning, before you eat.”

“Who needs sleep?”

Sensing she didn’t expect an answer to her question, I didn’t respond. I stared down at her hand in the grass; it was so much smaller than mine and tanned a golden hue on the back with the delicate bones visible. I could easily recall the feel of them when they had run over my shoulders and back.

I’d never be able to forget the vision of those beautiful sparks shooting from them, illuminating her eyes with an inner glow. I’d been nearly certain she was Lucifer’s daughter before then, but I hadn’t expected this depth of power from her. Nor had I expected the gut reaction I’d had to the beauty of those sparks and the look of joy that had suffused her face.

I wanted that light, even if it could blast me onto my ass and possibly kill me, if she ever learned to use it well.

Placing my hand on the ground to push myself to my feet, my fingers brushed over hers. A single spark shot from her, seeking me out. It had always been rumored the life force was the most lethal weapon an angel had, but I felt no pain from it as warmth flashed over my hand and through me.

I looked at her, but she was so focused on the sunset she hadn’t noticed the small spark between us. Rising to my feet, I walked away from her and toward the hill overlooking the wall and town below as I tried to gather my scattered thoughts.

I couldn’t have her, but I couldn’t stay away from her either. A return to the fire tonight was exactly what I needed to get my mind off of her.

River

My eyes fluttered open before closing again. Grabbing my pillow, I dragged it over my head and rolled to the side to try to block out the noise. After barely getting any sleep last night, and the demanding day of dealing with Kobal and his endless training, I’d passed out as soon as my head hit the pillow, and now he was doing something over there…

What
is
he doing?

I lifted the corner of the pillow off my ear to hear what was going on. Was that a moan? No, it was definitely a groan, maybe? I buried my head under my pillow again, determined not to care what was going on over there, but I found myself pulling the pillow back again.

I had never heard anything from the main part of the tent before at night. My hands clamped around the pillow as something clattered against the table. I listened to it rolling across the solid surface before the sound ended abruptly. It must have fallen off, or maybe he’d caught whatever it was. It had sounded like one of his goblets. Was he over there getting drunk?

Fan-freaking-tastic, I’d have a hungover, dissatisfied demon to deal with tomorrow. Could things get any worse?

They could, I knew they could, but I still didn’t want to have to deal with it. Something knocked against something else. With a sigh, I threw the sheets and blanket aside and sat up on the edge of the bed. I didn’t know what I was thinking, the last thing I needed to contend with was a drunken demon, but I would never get back to sleep with him staggering around over there doing whatever he was doing.

Rising to my feet, I walked over to the flap, pulled the buttons apart, and stepped into the main tent. At first I didn’t see him as my eyes immediately went to the lantern burning on the table beside the large cot he’d set up in the tent. Then a flash of motion to my right caught my attention. I took a step forward and froze when I spotted him.

He sat in one of the chairs, his chest bare and his head thrown back. The look of rapture on his face robbed me of my breath. His long legs were bared and a deeply tanned hue that had not been acquired from the depths of Hell but more the fires themselves had bronzed his skin. His feet were planted into the ground, his knees bent.

The muscles of his neck stood out starkly as he emitted a guttural sound that made my pulse skyrocket. The tattoos running over his arms and shoulders appeared to come to life in the flickering lanterns. I swore the fangs of the hounds glimmered in the light playing over him. For the first time, I was able to see all of those markings on his front as more flames circled around his rock hard pecs but didn’t move beyond them.

I was so fixated on seeing him so bared to me, and entrenched in the throes of ecstasy, that it took me a minute to notice the woman in his lap. I don’t know how I hadn’t immediately seen her; she simply hadn’t existed when his stark beauty held me so completely captivated.

Now, the curve of her bare back, the spill of her dark hair cascading over her and him was all I could see. Unreasonable hurt filled me; my hand flew to my mouth to stifle the startled cry rushing up my throat at the sight of the naked woman rising and falling in his lap. She rode him with abandon and clearly enjoyed it if her cries and the increasing pace of her body were any indication. His hands ran down to grasp her ass to guide her movements.

I took a staggering step back. I never should have come here. I never should have been witness to this, but no matter how badly I wanted to flee, I found myself still standing there as my shock steadily built toward anger. Only last night he’d been holding me in an intimate way, his tongue and hands had been caressing me. Except I hadn’t gotten the chance to feel all of his bare flesh against mine like this woman was, to experience the pleasure he could give me.

And now I never would. I was nothing special to him as a part of me had almost started to believe. I was the mission, the goal. The one to use and protect. No matter what happened, I wouldn’t allow myself to ever be used in this way by him.
Ever
.

All I wanted was to get as far from him as possible, but I was stuck with him, my life tied to his in this hideous way until all of this was over. I knew he would never hand my care over to another demon, knew he wouldn’t release me until he’d gotten what he sought from me. I took another step back as I struggled not to release the tears burning my eyes or the scream of rage burning my throat.

“Kobal,” the woman panted in a husky voice resonating with sensuality.

Stretching out my hand, I went to grab the flap in order to get away, but my eyes were drawn inexplicably to him once more. His mouth was against the woman’s shoulder now; his eyes open and blazing that enthralling amber color. My breath caught when I found him watching me with a look of astonishment and hunger.

I’d been caught creeping
again
. Instead of fleeing as any sane, somewhat human would do, I remained frozen, unable to make a single move. Those eyes continued to hold mine as his lips skimmed back to reveal his glistening fangs. The sight of those lengthening fangs caused warmth to spread between my legs.

His gaze never left mine as he raked them against the sensitive flesh of the woman’s neck. She cried out; her hands clasped more desperately at his shoulders, drawing him closer as his tongue swirled out to lick over her skin. I swore I felt his breath and tongue against my own shoulder as he tasted her flesh.

My breasts tingled, my nipples puckered. He seemed to know this as his eyes fastened on my chest in such a way that my thighs trembled.

How could he be staring at me with such desire while he was inside of
her
? What was I still doing in here? Why hadn’t I fled? How could I be standing here watching him with another woman, while
he
watched
me
?

Was I stuck in freaking quicksand? I wondered as my feet remained frozen to the ground.

The sheen of sweat on his body caused my tongue to lick over my lips with the urge to taste him. I’d lost my mind, I decided right then and there. He was having sex with another woman and I found myself longing for it to be
me
.

I finally managed to take a step back.

“Do you like this?” His words froze me before I could bolt out of here faster than a rabbit from a coyote.

His hands slid higher on the woman’s back when she panted, “Yes.”

He turned his head into her hair and, still holding my eyes, said into her ear, “Then come for me.”

My body reacted as if he’d said this to me. Unable to bite it back, a moan escaped me when he sank his fangs into her shoulder, something I would have believed excruciating, but the woman threw her head back and cried out in ecstasy.

I took another step back, torn between unanswered yearning and wanting to scream over my irrational reaction to him. A sane woman would have stormed out of here as soon as she’d entered.

She most certainly wouldn’t be watching him as he lowered his mouth to take one of the woman’s nipples into his mouth, nipping at it in such a way that the woman bucked and screamed as her fingers tore scratches into his shoulders. My need grew deeper as she marked him in this way, and I scented his blood on the air.

He lifted his head from her breast and, for the first time since he’d noticed me standing there, he looked away from me to focus on the woman. I tried not to, but I found myself helplessly following his gaze. My eyes landed on the woman as she arched against him and threw her head back again.

The world lurched out from under me as I gazed at her face while I started questioning my sanity all over again. I was looking at my
own
face. I couldn’t move while I watched her… me… her…

I couldn’t figure it out as the room spun around me. On wobbly legs, I took a step to the side and placed my hand against the thick canvas of the tent.

Movement drew my attention back to him. She… me… whoever had vanished and now it was only the two of us. His amber eyes burned into mine when he leaned forward and clasped his hands between his legs.

“Welcome to my dreams, River,” he murmured.

***

River

I jolted awake. My heart beat so forcefully, I could hear each pulse of it in my eardrums and feel it bashing against my ribs. I remained frozen, unable to move as the dream replayed over in my head. Not a dream, at least not
mine
.

Sliding up in the bed to lean against the headboard, I pressed my hand against my mouth when the movement caused the sheets to rub against me. Cloth that had felt so soft and inviting when I’d first crawled into this bed now felt abrasive against my hypersensitive skin.

I was
aching
; it was the only word I could think of to describe what I felt. I ached everywhere, for
him
. My hand skimmed over my breasts and a whimper sounded in my throat, but as the need of my body increased, I knew my hand wasn’t enough. It couldn’t be, not anymore, not without him.

He was dreaming of
me
and somehow the dream had been strong enough for me to latch onto him, just as I’d dragged him into my vision that day on the hill. Maybe I’d opened a connection between us that day and it was still open. It didn’t matter; I’d seen his dream, knew what he wanted, and I wanted it too,
so
badly.

My gaze fell on the flap dividing us. I could feel him over there, waiting. If my hand so much as fell on those buttons, he would be in here in a heartbeat, kissing me, on me,
in
me. Another whimper slid through me.

Go,
a voice in me advised, but the small sliver of sanity still within me kept me on the bed, my hand resting on my lower belly. My body throbbed for release, but I held back. Before it had always been enjoyable to bring myself to orgasm, but I knew it wouldn’t be enough anymore. I would never get any real release from this torment if it didn’t involve him.

A sound, half moan and half sob came from me. I kept my hand flat against my stomach as I stared at the flap. He wouldn’t come to me, not after last night; he would wait to see what I would do.

I lay there until the sun came up, staring at the flap, knowing that the same need wracking through me was also keeping him awake.