Finding the Blood Assassin [Lords of the Expanse 3] (Siren Publishing Allure) (19 page)

Jami had to hide the smile curling her lips. It had been fine for her to have others before him, but the thought of his little girl with anyone other than her soul tie had him in a fit and ready to kill. It was kind of amusing truth be told. “All right, love. She will be fine, Raven, I promise.”

“Of course she will,” he said with a decisive nod as they continued through the house. “She will learn everything I know to protect herself, and I will keep a close eye on her. She’ll be perfectly fine.” And if he said it enough times it might be the truth eventually. Gods he hoped he knew what he was doing, he really needed a manual or something.

“Then you see, that is really all that we can do, Raven. Simply give her all the tools she will need for life, trust that she will have the ability to make her own choices and decisions, and feel confident that we gave her all she will need to be a thriving and healthy individual.”

“Uh-huh.” He threw her a look and smiled slightly. “I’m still going to watch her like a father should, so that tact, while interesting, is not going to get me to back off completely. But you are right, I will ensure she has every tool available to her and I will ease back a little to give her room to grow.”

Jami just smiled and shook her head. He knew she was just going along with him in the moment. “I love you, Ra,” she said simply and rubbed her hand up and down his arm. “I believe in you, darling. You will make sure that she has everything, and so, too, will I.”

Smiling at her, he led both his women into the kitchens and then nearly ran for the door when the staff saw he had Emily. Under a swarm of females
and
males all cooing at his child, Raven stared at Jamison in horror mouthing “help” to her. He didn’t do well with that many around him, and he prayed she realized he was in serious trouble.

Jami placed herself between Raven and the people trying to get closer. Smiling gently at them, she said, “Thank you all for being a part of our family, but I think that Daddy and his little girl need just a little time and room to breathe?” They all bowed their heads and filed away, only a couple remaining close to be there in case they were needed. “Better?” she whispered as she leaned into him and pressed a kiss to the side of his neck.

Wrapping his arm around her, he nodded as he held her close. “Thank you, my lady,” he whispered against her ear. He knew he’d have to get over his seemingly nasty phobia, but it wasn’t as easy as he’d expected it to be. It was one reason he’d always willingly thrown himself into his missions. Alone with only himself to rely upon, it was his best working scenario. Breathing her in slowly, he lifted his head with a nod. “It will get better one day,” he promised to them both. 

“Sweetheart, we will love you no matter what. If it does, it does and if it doesn’t, it doesn’t. Emily and I will always be here for you, Raven. You know it as well as you know your own name, darling.” She also knew that he sometimes just needed reassurance, and she would always be there to give him that.

Not sure what to say to that, he never did when she was so supportive of his oddities, Raven nudged her to keep moving. The fact that she knew when he needed a bit of reassurance was nice, even if it made him feel like he was leaning too heavily on her. “Food,” he said to her as he looked down at Emily and had to wonder how much she recalled of his talks with her while Jamison had slept. He’d told her pretty much everything about himself, including his near constant state of awareness and absolute hatred of having people too close. His staff had known that always, but having his daughter around seemed to have broken that clear line, smudging it so much that they got too close without a thought.

Emily looked up at her father and the soft baby-blue eyes held the knowledge of the ages, they blinked at him and he knew in that look she knew all they talked about. “Right, food,” Jamison said from his side before he felt her moving toward the table. “Sit down. Do you want me to take her, Ra? So that you can eat? I don’t mind, you know.”

Mock growling at her, he shifted Emily to his other side as he sat down away from her. “You had her a whole day already. I need to catch up a little.” That and have a talk with her later about keeping at least some of what he’d told her secret. He was telling Jamison his life, but he was going slow so that she didn’t worry or freak out as she put it.

She laughed and shook her head. “You are so silly.” She reached over to pat his hand with soft look in her eyes. “But I will let you, darling. She’s your daughter, too, and she also happens to really like having you holding her.”

“Well I’m glad about that at least, because I find I love holding her,” Raven commented softly, still more than a little shy about admitting any feelings regarding anyone or anything. Lowering his head, he pressed his nose to the top of Emily’s and breathed in her soft and sweet baby scent. “She’s perfect, Jamison,” he murmured, straightening after a moment. “You are amazing, both of you.”

“Well of course we are,” Jami said with a smug little grin. “We were made for you, and anything less than amazing simply wouldn’t cut it, not with as terrific as you are, my Lord husband.” Letting his hand go, she stroked loving fingers over the back of their daughter’s head. “And besides, she has to be perfect because she is more than half yours, husband.”

That was the part that worried Raven. Emily was half his, which made him nervous as to what she would turn out to be as an adult. If he could keep her sheltered enough he’d worry less, but he knew that he could only do so much without her hating him. “That scares me, Jamison,” he murmured softly to her. “I’m not exactly kind…” Or gentle, nice, or perfect in any way and he knew it well.

“Ra, you are far more than you give yourself credit for. You are a wonderful man and a terrific husband, and you are going to be the best of fathers. You will love her, shelter and protect her, and teach her, and she will love you, Ra. But one day she will grow up and I think that is when you will see how much like you she is.”

“Then I think we are in real trouble,” he said without any real humor in his tone. He knew exactly what he was like. His lady wife, on the other hand, seemed to have blinders on about him.

Jamison shook her head and smiled. He had no idea just what a good man he was and she hoped that one day he would see it. He would see why she loved him so much and just why their daughter was going to turn out to be an incredible young woman.

Looking over at her, Raven worried about the look on her face. It was one that he knew boded ill for him. It usually ended up with him agreeing to anything she said and doing anything she wanted. Not that it was bad all the time. Every now and again it ended up extremely pleasant for them both.

Chapter 15

She babbled almost nonstop for two and a half months. No true words, more sounds than anything else. She laughed, played, and clapped in delight but more often than not she would be found talking constantly to her guards, her teddy bears, the staff, and even the corners of a room. It didn’t matter where she was but the young lady Emily was forever talking.

Two and a half months, almost to the day she walked into her daddy’s library, a guard at her back and smiling as he walked in with her. Looking up and seeing her father, she raised her chubby little arms. “Da-da-da-da.” It was her standard demand to be lifted up, cuddled, and listened to.

Startled, Raven looked up and stared. “Emily?” he asked in shock. Getting to his feet, he quickly rounded the desk to scoop her up in his arms. “Are you talking, baby girl?” he asked her as she fell silent once she was up. “Tell Daddy just what you are talking about, darling.”

Smiling, she patted his cheeks and pressed a big sloppy wet kiss to his chin before she started up again. “Da-da-da-da.” She grinned big and was blowing out bubbles once more before she laid her head to his shoulder and poked his chin lightly finger as she continued with the da-da bit.

“Oh, baby girl,” he whispered, holding her tight to him, his heart swelling with pride in his chest. And then came the next thought, and he headed off to find his lady wife. Finding her in the garden with her guards standing back so she didn’t put them to work, Raven looked at her and, over his daughter’s happy babbling, asked flat out, “Who in the world taught my baby girl to talk?!”

Jami laughed and shook her head, brushing the dirt off her skirt and tugging off her gloves as she approached. “I don’t know, but she’s got the wrong word,” she said and tickled Emily’s cheek. “It’s supposed to be ‘ma-ma’ not ‘da-da.’” 

Emily laughed and shook her head. “Da-da,” was all she retorted with.

Frowning, he shook his head. “One word leads to another and then she’ll be talking, walking, and going out into the world alone,” he protested. “Then boys will start to notice her and that just won’t do, love, this is all unacceptable.”

“Oh, Ra, honey,” Jamison said and moved her hand to cup her husband’s cheek. “She is supposed to grow up, my love. She can’t stay a baby for the rest of her life, honey, I’m sorry, but it’s just the way that it is, darling.”

“But it’s just not fair,” he muttered darkly. Already he was planning on pulling his weapons out of storage and checking them over carefully. He’d need them, he was sure. “I just got her and she’s already growing up on me, Jami.”

“Raven, honey, she will always be your little girl. She will always be yours to spoil, but you have to let her grow at her own pace. Besides, it’s only babbling words like “da-da,” my lord. She’s not solving the world’s issues in her sleep.” Jamison tipped her chin with a grin, drawing his attention down to where Emily was sound asleep against his shoulder.

“Today maybe, but tomorrow the gods only know,” he muttered to her as he rubbed Emily’s back gently. “I know I’m being an idiot, love, and I thank you that you are not pointing it out, but she’s my baby.”

“You’re being a good father.” Jamison smiled. “But you know if you would like to put her into her crib, I’m sure that you could practice on creating your son if you would like?” Her tone suggested she would like it, a lot.

Her words left him torn, just as he knew that she knew that detail. He loved every chance he got to hold his baby girl, but he simply couldn’t do without his lady wife naked in his bed. “Deal,” he said and turned toward the house. “I’ll meet you in our bed chamber. Make sure that there is nothing to impede me,” he called over his shoulder.

“Believe me, darling, there will be nothing there. Hurry to me, Raven. I need you desperately, it’s been far too long.” Jamison raced past him, shooting a grin as she went past and barreled for the stairs with her skirts held up high.

As quickly as he could, he followed her up toward their rooms. Changing Emily, he got her settled into her bed with barely a murmur from her. Pausing, he gently kissed her and tucked her in, watching for a few minutes before he tore himself away. Jogging through the connecting door, he closed it gently. Moving to the hallway door, he checked and locked it before he began to strip as he made his way across to the bed. “Hello, my love,” he murmured, letting his eyes skate over her beautiful form.

“Hello, handsome.” She held her arms out for him. “It was bad of me to ask you to choose, wasn’t it?” When he moved into her arms, she hugged him close, nuzzling her nose to his neck and cheek. “She won’t grow up without you being there, Ra. For now it’s perfect for us to be together, darling.”

“If I go out there and find out she’s already twenty, I will be having words with you, my lady wife,” he told her softly, sliding his hands over her body. “For now I need to take care of my female before I ensure the males of our world know I’ll be watching them all.”

“Oh yes, I approve of you taking care of your female. Later you can bring out your weapons and make sure that every male in this solar system and beyond all know that even looking at our daughter will cause them to be castrated or worse.” She moved her hands slowly down his body, her fingers dancing over his cock lightly. “But for now, take care of both of us, my love.”

Rolling over her and pinning her down, he smiled slowly. “I like and fully approve those plans,” he murmured before catching her lips with his.

* * * *

Wincing, Raven covered his eyes. “Jamison, she’s three, do you really think she should be doing that?” he asked, feeling nauseous as he watched his daughter throwing herself headfirst into the pond. All with zero regard for her own safety or her father’s heart condition that had come about the day she’d been born. He knew his little girl could swim like a fish, but he nearly had heart failure every time they convinced him to come down to play with them in the pond.

“She loves the water, Ra,” Jami said with a laugh. “You should see her in the lake, Raven. It’s far deeper and longer, but she is just as active. She dives deeper and swims farther.” She looked over at him with a grin on her lips. “Why do you think I don’t let you go with us when we are going to the lake?”

“Because you know I’d keel over dead if I saw that,” he muttered, peeking through his fingers. “Oh gods,” he groaned before flopping down on his back. Also, he didn’t have to watch the horror playing out before his very eyes. “You could have warned me that it would be like this, love,” he told her as he looked to her, enjoying the late light of the day and the way it danced over her face and hair.

Jamison looked at him, leaning over him and laughing. “The guards are close, all of them are strong swimmers, and there are two in the pond with her, love. Believe me, darling, she is perfectly fine and you know it.”