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“
Better than yesterday,” she said coolly. “Assuming Brie doesn’t jump on you when you kiss her like that, you’ll be good.” She smiled as she spoke, like she wasn’t affected by his kiss. Like it hadn’t meant anything to her. Swallowing hard he realized that he wanted it to mean something. He didn’t want to touch her, taste her, and kiss her—no, he wanted more than that. He wanted her to want him. He wanted more than the physical act. Inwardly he cringed. That thought was so unlike him, so foreign, but as he gazed at her, he longed for it. He wanted something with her, but her reply made it obvious that the feelings weren’t two directional. Swallowing hard, he forced down a lump of regret that was nearly choking him.

He grinned to cover his real feelings, putting on the fucking mask that hid his real thoughts. He didn’t want things to be like that with her, but that was the way things were.

Playfully, he said, “I thought that scene needed some tension. That worked, right?”

“
Yes,” she said softly. “It worked perfectly.” Her dark curls were fanned across her shoulders. It was impossible to look at her and not touch her. Every instinct in his body was wrong. She didn’t care for him, not like that.

He nodded toward the stairs, “I better get going.” Without another word, he turned and walked away from her. It felt like something inside of him ripped.

I shouldn’t have kissed her, he thought, climbing the stairs two at a time.

When he walked out onto the stage, he acted. Trystan was everything he was supposed to be, and no one knew any different. None of them knew him at all.

CHAPTER 7

~MARI~

“
You let him kiss you?” Katie asked. Her mouth was hanging open, her burger positioned in her hands like she was going to take a big bite, but instead it just hung there. A piece of lettuce fell to her plate. Finally she cocked her head to the side, which is Katie’s look for
are you crazy?
 

Pushing around the fries on my plate, I shrugged, “We were running lines. I thought he’d stop, but he went to the end of the scene.”

Katie and I had made plans to meet up at the diner for dinner. There was a scattering of people surrounding us and Katie’s voice was a little too loud for my taste. There hadn’t been many other kisses to report, but this one seemed to blindside her. It was completely unexpected and according to her, completely stupid.

She blinked big brown eyes at me, “But he kissed you.”

“
But nothing. It meant nothing. He was practicing,” I said, raising my hand and pointing a French fry at her. “It’s called acting.”

Her mouth was still suspended open. She snapped it shut, shaking her head and put down the burger. Her hands tugged at her long dark hair when she said, “This is going to screw with you. I can’t believe you let him do that. You can’t get him out of your head when he smiles at you and you frickin’ let him kiss you!” I knew that she only acted like this because she cared about me.

Katie was the only one who had a clue about my feelings for Trystan. I hated that I liked him that way. He literally had a gaggle of groupies that followed him around. I didn’t want to be one of them, but the guy got to me. There was no way to ignore it. I leaned back in the booth and looked around the diner to make sure no one we knew was near-by. This was my biggest secret. If Trystan found out, I’d die.

“
Shhh!” I hissed, whipping my neck around. The movement made my hair fall over my shoulder and into my ketchup. “Awh, man.”

Katie swallowed a laugh and tossed me a bunch of napkins. I dabbed the condiment out of my hair. When my brown curls seemed okay, I tossed my hair back over my shoulder again. Finally Katie asked, “So how was it?”

Her question took me by surprise. I glanced up at her with that deer in the headlights look. Squirming, I replied, “Fine, I guess.” Better than fine. He made me feel every inch of my body. I flushed thinking about it.

She shook her head and picked up her burger again, muttering, “Yes, I can see that it was marginal at best. You’re such a bad liar, Mari.”

“
Fine.” I leaned closer to her and lowered my voice, “You know how I told you he gets to me? Like we can be standing there talking, and it’s like he can read my mind or something?” She nods. I’d told her this before. Trystan had a weird way of knowing what I was going to say before I said it. When his gaze bore into me, I felt exposed, like he could read my mind. I avoided eye contact with Trystan, which was part of my mistake today.

I continued, “It was like that, but more. It felt like he could see through me in that moment, like all my thoughts were just spread out for him. And his lips were so soft. The way he did it made me want him even more.” I grabbed the sides of my head, placed my elbows on the table and leaned forward. With closed eyes, I uttered, “What a disaster.” When I look at Katie again, she’s grinning. “What?”

“
You did this to yourself, you know. You’re the one who says a kiss has to mean something for it to be real, and it seems like this fake kiss made your brains blow up.” She sips her soda and leans back in the booth. If someone else had said it, the words would have felt mean. But the way Katie mentions them, made it as confrontational as saying,
please pass the milk
.

But I won’t back down on this issue. I was right. “A kiss is supposed to mean something. I just—”

Katie cut me off, “Do yourself a favor and stay away from him. You know he’s a love them and leave them kind of guy. That’s not your kind of guy. Hanging around with Trystan is just going to get you hurt.” Her voice was beseeching, like she doesn’t want me unhappy.

I can’t avoid Trystan. He’s at the theater every day with me, but I know what she means. “I’ll try.”

“
Good,” she said, smiling. She plucked a fry off her plate and popped it into her mouth. For a moment neither of us said anything. Before taking another fry, she said, “Did you see that video, yet? The one on You Tube of that guy singing?”

I shook my head, “What are you talking about?” I’d been at practice all afternoon. It was after 7:00pm and I was eating dinner on the way home.

Katie always knew what was going on. She pulled out her phone, flicked a few buttons, and handed it to me. A video loaded. It’s hard to make it out, but a guy was sitting on a stool with a guitar on his lap. His fingers moving up and down the instrument as he played. There was a strong light behind him obscuring his face. The only thing I could tell was that he’s young, maybe my age and a little taller than me, with dark hair. The song he was singing wasn’t something I’d heard before. It was a love song about a girl that doesn’t know he’s alive. He sounded so bewitched by her that I couldn’t look away. The tune was catchy, but it was the haunting lyrics that mesmerized me. When the song ended, I stared at the phone immediately wanting to hear more.

Blinking, I looked up at Katie, “Who is that?”

She grins, “No one knows. He uploaded the song last night and it went viral.”

His voice echoed in my mind. The lyrics said he was completely taken with a girl who didn’t know he was alive. She called to him like a siren, and he couldn’t help but love her. It was tragic and beautiful. I wanted to know who the singer was. I glanced at the phone again and pressed play. The words flowed through the tiny speakers.

Someone passing by stopped and said, “Great song, right?” It was a senior I’d seen around but never spoke to before.

Katie beamed, “It really is. Have you heard anything? Did they figure out who he is?”

The girl shook her head, “No, but it won’t be long. I bet the guy goes home tonight and sees that his video got all those comments today and we know his name by tomorrow. At least that’s what I’m hoping for.” She laughed and Katie told her thanks.

“
God, I hope so,” she said, turning back to me. “I can’t see a damn thing with that light in the way.”

“
Me neither,” I said, staring at the screen after the video stopped. “Did you see all these comments? There are thousands and this hasn’t even been up for a day yet.”

Katie snapped the phone away and scrolled through the comments, then handed it back to me. “That one is mine,” she said, tapping at a spot on the screen.

I read it and gasped, “You did not type that!”

“
Yup,” she said, grinning, snatching the phone back. “He’s too hot not to.”

“
You can’t even see him!” I laughed. “How do you know he’s hot?”

“
I just know. With a voice like that and the way he sings about her…” Katie sounds like she has a bad crush on the mystery guy, which wasn’t like her.

“
It could be anyone. This guy could be a troll. Or a stalker.”

Katie’s eyebrow darted up, “You really think that a stalker made a video?”

“
No,” I admitted and quickly added, “but it would make it easier not knowing who it is if he was some kind of deviant.”

“
Well, I’m going to find out.” She took one more bite of her burger and waived at the waitress to get the check. “I’m going home and surfing the web until someone forks over a name.”

CHAPTER 8

~TRYSTAN~

When Trystan arrived home, the small condo was empty. He sighed a sigh of relief and tossed his books on the kitchen table. Trystan looked around at the dilapidated furnishings and the graying walls. In the back of his mind, he hoped it would burn and burn all the memories with it. This place wasn’t a refuge, it was a nightmare.

Trystan pulled the fridge open and stared at empty shelves. “Fuck,” he muttered running his hands through his hair. Empty. Again. He slammed the door shut. Shaking his head, Trystan grabbed his books and went back to his bedroom. Once inside he locked the door with a slide bolt.

He’d have to grab groceries, but there was no way Trystan would risk running into his father for food. Besides, his stomach was still in knots from kissing Mari. Eating was a necessity, but he wasn’t particularly hungry.

Trystan pulled an old laptop he’d purchased second-hand out from between his mattresses. It booted slowly, its small screen flickering to life like it wished it were dead. When it finally was up and running, Trystan borrowed a neighbor’s unsecure internet connection. He had to take down that video. If Mari heard that song... The pit of his stomach dropped just thinking about it.

Trystan navigated his way toward the YouTube page, Day5705. Shock lined his face when the page finally loaded. Before he could click delete, he saw comments—tons of them. They loved his song. He scrolled down, recognizing several kids from his school. Hope and fear flooded his chest. If his classmates saw it, then Mari might have seen it. She’d know. She’d recognize him. Trystan played the video again, frantically trying to see if it was possible to tell who he was.

With his hand keeping the curser hovering above the delete button, Trystan stared at the page. Should he erase it? Make it like it never existed? What would happen to the swarm of people who demanded to know who he was?

The only reason to delete it was Mari, but she was also the reason he wrote the song. Maybe he could ask her about it. Maybe that would be a way to approach the subject of them—a way for her to know he was sincere. Trystan scrolled down through the comments, and made a short post before shutting down the computer. He slid the black plastic under his bed and pulled off his shirt.

The front door slammed shut. Trystan killed the light quickly and jumped into bed with his jeans still on. He could hear his father through the apartment. His voice echoed back to Trystan, “You ungrateful brat! There’s only one thing I ask you to do, and you can’t even do that!”

Something hard thunked into Trystan’s door and shattered. He closed his eyes tight. It was only a matter of time, he reminded himself. The yelling and screaming would stop, his father would pass out, and Trystan could rest safely for a few hours.

CHAPTER 9

~MARI~

Later that night, I surfed the web, as I listened to his song over and over again. It was addicting. Once I heard it, I wanted more. And not knowing who sang it made me want to know who he was to the point of insanity. The user account was Day5705. It wasn’t even a name. The more message boards and tweets I read about him, the more people started referring to him as Day Jones, the anonymous lone musician.

The way he sang was sexy, but it was the words and his voice that captured my attention. I felt like that about Trystan. He saw me as some junior nobody, the girl assigned to read lines with him. This was the second year we worked together and it was always the same. Trystan would talk to me at practice, but that was all I saw of him. The cold hard truth was that he didn’t know I was alive. And with friends like Seth shoving college girls down his throat, why would he?

There was a soft side to Trystan, something that only came out when we were alone. The arrogant swagger that he had melted away and he seemed vulnerable. It felt like I was seeing something that he didn’t show to anyone else, but I knew that couldn’t be. He didn’t think of me like that. Trystan was pining over someone else; some girl that Seth didn’t think was worth his time. Knowing Seth, he’d try to keep Trystan away from her. I thought about it, but there was no way to figure out who Trystan’s crush could be. Before and after practice, Trystan was surrounded by girls. It’d always been like that. All the girls loved him and every guy wanted to be him.

I pulled up Trystan’s facebook page and gazed at his picture. Those perfectly pink lips—the way they felt would be seared into my mind forever. It wasn’t my first kiss, but no kiss had ever made me feel so much before. I closed the page and pressed play on the song again. I went to bed that night thinking that someone would sniff out the mysterious Day Jones’ real identity by morning, but when I woke up they still didn’t know.

During the night he posted a comment and it made them love him even more. The guy seemed humble. He made one comment—that’s it—and said: