Clear as Day (5 page)

As he slipped the ring onto her finger, he touched a kiss to her mouth so gentle and sweet her tears poured all the more. “I love you, Kay.”

Emotion flooded his voice like rich crimson, coloring, changing everything. The warm salt and musk and clean sweat scent that was uniquely Nate filled her. He was all around her, in her. She felt utterly cherished and utterly trapped.

The band was too loose. With a deep flush and an apologetic smile, he moved the ring to her middle finger, where the band fit perfectly, as if meant to be. She’d never seen a more beautiful ring.

But he loved her.

Oh, this ruined everything.

Chapter Four

Oh, hell. Well, that was a complete screw up. Nate cursed himself left and right and cuddled Kay close as she wept huge, silent tears. Her tears gave him a chill. He’d never seen a woman cry so still and silently.

This is what happens when you let your heart and cock do all the thinking, asshole
.

She’d let him put the ring on her finger, but those sure as hell weren’t happy tears. He’d envisioned a variety of responses to popping the question. Stunned tears weren’t on the list.

Shit. Now what should he do? And where did he stand? He’d jumped the gun and made her cry, but she was letting him hold her. That was a good sign, right?

His ideas that had seemed so inspired on the long flight over the Pacific were in desperate need of a retake. Asking her here, in the peaceful privacy of a place she loved, the place they shared all these years should have been the right thing to do. But no, because his brain was all scrambled with sex and love he had to babble everything out, and then, worse, he mistook her moving into his arms for a yes.

And he couldn’t exactly take the ring off her once he’d comprehended his fuck-up.

But she hadn’t taken the ring off or said no, either.

He held her close, stroking her hair, and kissed the top of her head. “Hey, Kay? Babe?”

She shivered with a thin inhale, her body tight, and scrubbed a palm over her eyes before tugging against his grip for him to let her go. He loosened his arms reluctantly.
Here it comes.

She sat back, blinking and looking lost. One more tear rolled down her cheek.

Damn, he hated not knowing what to do or how to fix this. He wiped the stray tear from her cheek and caressed her face. “Babe? Talk to me.”

She wouldn’t meet his eyes.

With his heart wedged into his throat, he readied himself for her to hand back his ring.

She sucked in a long draw of breath. “We should get cleaned up. See everyone?” Her face creased into a strained mask of a smile. Her left hand was tightly closed.

That was good, right?

He was choking to death inside, but he kept his voice easy. “Whatever you want to do. We can go now, or wait, whatever works for you.”

“I’d like to wash up.”

“Sure thing.” He stood and offered her his hand. Okay, so slow and steady was the course to set here.

She paused for a heart-shredding moment, and then set her hand in his.

She hadn’t said no. He needed to hold on to that. Damn, this was going to make him mental. Why couldn’t he fall for someone easy?

Too late. He was long fallen for Kay and always would be.

At a loss for what to do, Nate let his mouth motor on with easy nonsense stuff while they washed up. To his relief, her tears ended, she let him wrap her in a towel and dry her off, and he was getting some small almost-smiles from her with his nonsense. Maybe this meant he could jolly her along and salvage the mess he’d made.

Why was he so surprised at the disaster? After six years of learning his prickly lover’s mindset, he should have known better, but her delighted, bare-breasted greeting had thrown him off guard, and hope, along with a heady wallop of plain lust, had commandeered all thought processes.

He should have talked the whole thing over with JoAnn. If anyone understood Kay, JoAnn did. But JoAnn would have discussed things with Lloyd, and Lloyd would have kicked the matter around with Dave, and then—well, while Lloyd and Dave were his best friends since they were kids, he might as well post his plans on Facebook.

She braided her damp hair with tight, sharp motions and set to applying sunscreen to her face and front of her body. Her eyes focused far out on the lake, far past the boats streaking and drifting in scattered dabs of white and color on the flat, blue distance, far from her task as she smoothed the cream over her breasts.

His body tightened and ached enthusiastically.
That would be a no right now, idiot.
He picked up the bottle of sunscreen from the table. “Let me do your back.”

She looked blankly at him for a moment and then turned and swept her braid over her shoulder.

He massaged the creamy lotion over her shoulders, arms and back. Spray sunscreens might be more efficient, but at least this gave him an excuse to touch her and give her ease. The lotion’s sweet odor filled him, a familiar part of the scent he always thought of as Kay’s. Her slim body remained tense under his hands. He kept his touch light and easy, gliding over her satiny pale skin and her scattered freckles begging to be kissed.

A shiver trembled through her, and she sighed, gradually relaxing.

Taking that as further thumbs up on the slow and steady plan, he eased his way down the fine line of her spine until he smoothed the last bit of lotion over her hips and low over the cleft and soft curves of her bottom where the swimsuit never covered.

He pressed a kiss to her shoulder. “All done back here.”

“Thanks.” Kay pulled on her blue bikini, and her simple movements adjusting her breasts in her top knocked all thoughts of romantic disaster, friends, supper, and waterskiing right out of his brain. Oh yeah, he liked that one on her, too.

She frowned at him and slipped a T-shirt over her head.

He sighed and yanked clean swim trunks from his backpack. Yes, he was a lovesick idiot.

They had to talk. Shit. Maybe he’d need JoAnn’s help after all. He jammed his legs into the trunks and hiked them up. Nope, not baggy enough. Idiot.

His turn for sunscreen. He took up the bottle and ran a line of the lotion down his arm.

“Nate, turn around and I’ll do your back for you.” Her voice came quiet and small.

“Thanks.”

A line of warm sunscreen trailed across his shoulders and back, ending with the sputtering of the bottle. She efficiently, and much too quickly, spread the lotion over his skin.

“Turn around.”

Nate complied and let Kay continue to cover his chest and belly. He shut his eyes and focused on the pleasure of her hands on him. Then her delicate strokes came to his face and throat. He stood quietly, soaking in her touch, and ignoring his cock, which remained valiantly at attention.

Haven’t you had enough already?

No.

Sunscreen done, Nate busied himself hanging towels and swimsuits on the line and dumped the last of the forgotten ice from the picnic bag into Kay’s cooler.

Kay gathered up her beach bag of things she’d need for skiing and supper, and by the time she’d finished, her face was serene again and her sunglasses hid the last signs of her tears. “Ready?”

“Whenever you are.” He stepped away from his own backpack. Think positive. He was coming back here tonight.

He glanced at her left hand. She still wore the ring, and it looked as perfect on her as he’d envisioned half a world away, even despite his completely screwing up on the size. Damn, he hadn’t gotten any part of this right, had he?

She hadn’t said no. She hadn’t said yes, but she hadn’t said “hell, no” either.

What a thin lifeline for his heart to hold on to.

But she never said yes, and that still means do not pass Go, asshole
.

Ah, hell.

****

Apparently, it was possible to become accidentally engaged.

Nate’s beautiful ring hung heavily on Kay’s finger. They really needed to talk, and she hadn’t a clue where or how to start.

Well, Nate was talking, and she was having the worst time following his train of conversation.

“…and wait until you see the sun set over the ocean from the back deck. There’s nothing like it!” Nate kept up a cheerful running monologue as they hiked the longish trail over to Spider Camp, winding between tumbles of rock and clusters of cholla and prickly pear.

She was a strange mix of relaxed and loose from their lovemaking, exhausted from her tears and the heat, and completely panicked Nate would tell everyone they were engaged, when she’d hadn’t said yes at all.

But you haven’t said no, either. What on earth are you doing
?

The mast of Nate’s little sailboat and its bright, furled sails came into sight, along with five assorted motorboats and a hodgepodge of multicolored tarps and tents in various degrees of weathering surrounded by gray-green clumps of tamarisk, mesquite, and willow. Although Spider Camp was the largest campsite on the notch of lake they called Two Bass Bay, with all their gear this bunch managed to make the roomy wedge of sand and gravel cut into the rocky hillside look cramped.

A male shout rang out, “They’re here!”

Kay’s stomach clenched, and her hand tightened reflexively on Nate’s.

Nate tugged her down the slope into the fray of hellos with old friends and newcomers.

JoAnn’s surprise was unmistakable. Kay had expected maybe a new hairstyle, a tattoo, new boat, something, but there stood her best friend since college in all her glory with a beaming grin, her same wispy blonde pixie cut, and a small baby belly filling out her fluorescent pink tank top emblazoned
Under Construction
.

Oh, my, wow…after so long
.

JoAnn patted her gently rounded belly, joy shining in her soft blue eyes. “No skiing for me this trip. What do you think?”

Delight for JoAnn rippled out into laughter, and Kay hugged her. “Totally floored and happy for you. It’s great. You look fantastic. How come you didn’t say anything?” Seeing JoAnn so happy tightened Kay’s throat. Guilt crept in. They hadn’t gotten together in a year. And her summer travels made catching her by phone and online nearly impossible. So, it was her own fault.

“We kept it under wraps, just until, you know, we knew everything was okay. I am in A-plus shape.” JoAnn beamed. “I’ve been dying to tell you. Didn’t just want to leave a voice mail. And then the guys pulled off this trip, and I was so happy I got to tell you in person.”

“How’s Lloyd taking it?”

“Shocked as hell at first, but he’s absolutely nuts about the baby. He’s been doing everything short of knitting booties. Definite changes bein’ made ’cause of the munchkin. We’re even moving out of the trailer into the house. Kay, a real house. Finally finished! Drywall. Paint! Carpet! Yes!” She thrust a victory fist into the air.

Kay laughed. “Wow. He finished the house?”

JoAnn nodded. “A mind-boggling concept, I know. He actually let the crew touch his pet project. I am sooo happy.” She chuckled wickedly and leaned over to whisper in Kay’s ear, “And it’s a girl. And I haven’t told him yet. Don’t want him to keel over before we’ve moved the furniture.”

“I’m so happy for you. This is the best news ever.” She swallowed back a new flush of tears, happy ones this time.

“So, Kay, ready to run off to Bora Bora with me?” Dave Knight called out. He sauntered over and caught Kay up in a hug that lifted her off her feet and then set her down with a smacking kiss. He flashed his wry, irresistible grin, his whiskey-brown eyes sparkling.

Kay laughed. He asked that every year. “Maybe next year, Dave.”

She’d known Dave three years longer than she had Nate, and he’d become a good friend over the years. His black hair was still Marine short. The man was prime material for a firefighter’s calendar, ripped and handsome in a dark, rough way, and the light loved those hard lines of bone and muscle. He worked for the Forestry Service as a Smokejumper, a firefighter who parachuted in to fight wilderness fires.

A serious-looking white bandage wrapped his right hand and wrist. Was that the reason behind his extended time off?

Dave caught her looking and winked. “I’m fine.” He grinned wickedly at Nate and kissed Kay on the cheek.

Nate just rolled his eyes at his friend’s antics. He, Dave, and Lloyd Sayer had been best friends since they were teens and the teasing between them was as natural as breathing.

“Behave yourself, Trouble.” JoAnn linked her arm with Kay, stealing her from Dave as he and Kay laughed. “Lloyd, Chuck, and R.J. have gone fishing for our suppers. Oh, good, there’s Olivia.” She waved to the slim, black-haired woman picking her way hesitantly down the hillside trail. “Olivia and R.J. took High Water. They’re new to desert backcountry camping. They usually vacation in Florida and the Caribbean, keep a boat in Ft. Lauderdale, R.J. said, but Lloyd talked them into coming west for this trip. They at least know their way around boats and fish.”