Arrows (15 page)

The movie was all right.

Awkward might be a better way to describe it. Dirty dancing—no lie, that’s really what it was about. The one character, Baby, stumbled on a secret party during a family vacation where everyone was, I am not making this up, “dirty dancing,” and then stuff happened, and she was dirty dancing with Johnny, her major crush. The whole movie was nothing but a tease. All I could think about was dancing like that with Karma, which felt wrong and awesome and started to make me crazy.

“I know this dance by heart,” Karma said, pointing with her pencil to the scene with Baby and Johnny. “Peyton and I mess around with it in the studio—I play Johnny and she plays Baby. Ha!”

I shoved a handful of popcorn into my mouth. Bad, bad, bad, bad—

“Hey!” I rubbed the spot on my forehead where a kernel hit.

“Can you talk?” she said.

“About what?”

“Just conversation, I don’t know. I said, ‘I play Johnny and she plays Baby,’ and you just sat there like you didn’t care.”

Girls could be so clueless. “I care.” I turned to face her. “But I’m sitting here thinking there’s not much to say to that except maybe…what else happens when you practice dirty dancing? And I’m not sure either of us wants to go there.”

“Great, now you’re making it sound dirty.”

“Well, that
is
in the name of the movie.”

“You don’t have to be gross.”

“Me?” I sat up with a smile, gaping. “You’re the one who brought it up. I can’t help it if my mind wanders.”

She gave a short cough, stood, and strode toward me until her silhouette blocked the TV. “Okay, Mr. Wandering, now you’re twisting what I said. I never meant for you to
go there
with any of this.” She stopped before she got too close. I did something very stupid.

I stood.

The Great Divide was gone. Well. She was the one who’d crossed it.

“Hmm, are you going to teach me a lesson?” I asked. I held up my hands in mock defense. “Don’t hurt me.” Her mouth wobbled into a smile.

“Ugh!”

I caught her hands in mine as she lunged. She was smiling and her eyes were glittering and I was in serious, serious trouble. She struggled playfully and it was all too much. I was done for. Logic, bye-bye. I didn’t care about Blackout or Danny or Mount Olympus or the girly movie in the background because all I wanted to do was kiss her and feel her hands on me and never stop.

She turned her face away when I tried. I played it off like I’d tripped—cursed once and grabbed the toe that I’d apparently “stubbed on the floor.” You know how those floors get in the way. She said something like, “You’re missing the best part,” and then returned to the opposite end of the Great Divide, where we proceeded to finish the movie in a very proper fashion, light flashing across her face when the scenes changed, her knees drawn up to her chin, her thumb brushing along her bottom lip.

“Roses?” The next day, Mom slid two grocery bags onto the counter and worked at smoothing the top of her hair. “Are those from Danny?”

I rubbed one of the petals between my fingers as I finished arranging them in the vase. “Aren’t they perfect?”

“What’s the occasion?”

“Oh nothing. Just because.” I started to tell her about the double date he’d planned for us, which was happening in about ten minutes, but she gasped and gripped my arms.

“What is that?” She held my chin and tipped my head toward the light. “What happened?”

“Mom, let go.” For someone who always wanted me to take responsibility for my life, she sure knew how to smother me. “I’m fine. I fell at dance.” I twisted away and pulled the vase into the crook of my elbow. “I’m going out. I’ll be home by curfew, okay?”

“What about Nell?”

“Leah is babysitting so we can have a date night.”

Mom’s brows furrowed. “You’re not going to rehearsal? Juliette said you got a new guy to help with the scholarship.”

“Aaryn. He’s from Florida.” The vase was ice-cold. “I have to get ready.”

“Sweetie, let’s talk.”

Great. I switched the vase to my other arm, the blooms brushing my shirt. Mom pushed her hand along the table, then tapped her knuckles twice. “Is something going on?” Her face twitched. “You’ve been acting funny lately.”

I let out a big sigh. “No, Mom. I’m just busy.”

“I’m not doing this again.” Her voice was low. “I’m not going to sit here while my daughter spirals out of control like last year.”

“Mom, trust me, it’s not like last year. It’s one date night.”

“Does this have something to do with the other boy?”

“No, Mom, definitely not. Aaryn’s just a friend.”
A friend who tried to kiss me.

Ten minutes later I was out the door.

—

“Finally.” I grinned at Peyton, who had her hand extended through the open truck door. Nick hopped out to let me in. The weather was muggy, but my dress was short and my hair was twisted in a knot. I climbed in next to Danny and kissed his cheek.

“Prodigy.” He smelled like mint gum.

“How are you?” Peyton asked. “Aw, that cut looks painful. I can’t believe you fell.”

I flipped the visor and pulled the hair forward over the mark. I’d parted my curls to the other side to hide it better. “I’m
fine.
Can we talk about something else, please? Mom and Leah are driving me insane.” I shook my head and adjusted the AC.

Danny revved the gas and sped more than necessary across the bridge.

“Easy there, killer,” Nick said. He had to curve his head forward to fit in the cab. He slid his arm around Peyton when he realized Danny had no intention of driving his truck like anything but a race car. Miraculously we made it to the Sports Cage in one piece.

The Sports Cage was part bowling alley, part restaurant and bar. Plenty of deals were made in the maze of dimly lit hallways and rooms—some kids sold weed, or found a girl to ask out, and the girls were known to commiserate in the bathrooms where all the best rumors were shared. A pop song blared from the speakers.

“Thanks for planning this,” I said, settling into the booth.

Nick held Peyton’s hand as she slid into the seat and she beamed. They were cute together. Danny set his phone on the table and checked his messages until the waitress handed each of us a menu.

I tried to ignore the fact that Peyton and Nick were soft-talking to one another about the options while Danny waved his menu like a worm, the vinyl crackling a little.

“What are you getting?” I asked.

“Double cheeseburger.”

“I think I’ll have the grilled chicken salad.”

He rolled his eyes. “You and your salads.”

I picked at the menu’s edge just as I caught the end of Nick and Peyton’s conversation. “…no chicken dinner on our wedding day.”

She laughed and shoved him a little. He pretended to fall out of his side of the booth.

“Nick,”
she whispered. “We’re in public.”

He righted himself and sipped his water with one pinky out. He loved riling her, and as always his goal for the evening seemed to be making her smile.

“Did you just say wedding day?” I said. Dishes clattered in the kitchen and it was hot in there, too hot, like the windows hadn’t been opened in thirty years.

Peyton sucked a small ice cube and waved her hand. “Yeah. Nick’s just being weird.”

“You guys are getting married?”

“No, shhh, don’t say that too loud in here.” She leaned forward. “Too many spies.”

Nick stuck out his bottom lip. “I asked her to marry me, and she turned me down flat.”

“I did not.” Peyton poked him. “Don’t tell people that, jeez.”

“Well, you did!”

“I said we’re too young.” She tossed her hair and held it back with one hand, looking at him with a really soft expression. “Ask me again in two years when I’m an RN. Maybe we can get married before I go for my bachelor’s degree.”

Nick bowed his head. “I got a ring and everything.” He slammed his fist over his heart. “Nurse! I think my heart is dying. Nurse.”

“Nick.”
If she smiled any wider, her face might get stuck.

I stirred my water, dunking the lemon below the ice. “Why wait if you know you’re meant to be together?”

The table shook as Danny jiggled his knee. He stretched his neck to one side and the other before proceeding to crack each one of his knuckles. A couple of girls from school walked by and waved at him.

“I want to do that dance thing with you,” Danny blurted out. The rest of us fell silent. “So. Yeah.” He made a spitting sound through his teeth. “You can let what’s-his-face know that he doesn’t have to come to practice anymore.”

The air felt suffocating as I inhaled. “Really?” A girl walking by accidentally bumped Nick with her purse. “You’ll do it now?”

“Yup.”

My finger traced a ring of water on the table. “We have to work a lot. Every night.”

“Okay.” He sat back, one arm draped over the side of the booth. “Whatever you need, babe.”

I cleared my throat, but it felt like there was something caught in the back. “Can you come tomorrow after school?”

“I got football practice.”

“Oh, right, I forgot. How about after?”

Danny made a face, then began tipping his head back and forth like a pendulum. “That might work.”

My heart was racing as I smoothed the napkin over my thighs. “If you’re going to commit to this, we really have to practice.”

He took my hand and squeezed, then lifted it to his mouth. “I’ll be there.”

—

We dropped Peyton off first, then Nick. The truck idled in the driveway as we watched him saunter in.

“Let’s get out of here,” Danny said. The feel of his lips brushing my ear helped me relax. The engine roared. I scooted over and kissed him, my stomach fluttering as he pushed back, that old fire we both knew so well. It had been too long since we’d had sex.

“You taste good,” he said, and massaged my thigh.

“I’ve missed you,” I said. He was changing. The flowers, dinner, now the scholarship. He was going to be better. He was going to live up to all of the pros on my list.

He inched down my thigh and drove off. I knew where he was taking me.

He turned down a gravel road toward our hideout. We hadn’t been there in a long time, too long, and sparks spread through my body from head to toe.

He pressed my hand against him and groaned when I melted toward his chest. I unbuttoned his pants.

The abandoned hunting shack was at the end of a rutted trail, our lover’s escape. We’d made out—and then some—surrounded by those same trees, those broken windows. Danny settled against the door with his eyes closed, petting my hair. A few seconds later I kissed him with wet lips.

“I want you,” I whispered.

He nudged me downward. “You know what I like.”

His stomach was soft and smooth beneath my cheek. I loved us like that, him alert and wanting and mine. After a few minutes, I edged alongside him.

“Do you have a condom?”

He cupped my breasts, massaging me, his eyes ravenous, familiar. “I…don’t think so.”

“Oh. Well, then…we can’t.” I sighed and sat back. “I missed a pill last week.”

“It’ll be fine, babe.” He tugged me close, but I couldn’t kiss him the way I wanted to. I couldn’t let things get too far.

“Stop it. I’m not going to be stupid.”

He groaned. The truck was really quiet as we sat there in the dark, each of us staring out the window.

“Sorry,” I added.

He zipped up, whipped his gaze over his shoulder, and backed out of the woods.

Day 19

Idiot.

She’d known I was going to kiss her. And she’d made the line I’d almost crossed perfectly clear.

Case in point, she cancelled our next rehearsal, though I told myself I had no idea why. I also didn’t know what she planned to do instead and hadn’t been obsessing about it all day. In fact, I hadn’t wondered once what she was doing since I hung up the phone, because I didn’t have time. There was too much to do in less than seventy-two days. Save Phoebe and myself from Blackout, for instance.

And Phoebe. The guilt I felt for liking Karma—stupid!—while Phoebe waited for me to fix things. While
we
had a thing. What if Phoebe could see me from up there or some god was watching me, filling her in?