Always Remember (9 page)

She surged to her feet, her body stiff as she absorbed his words and the insult in his tone. “What?”

“You heard me, Jess. I’m not spending the evening fielding everyone’s questions. Because by now, Mattie has told the entire community that you’re going to join us.” He yanked off his hat, tossed it onto the seat, and swallowed back the churning in his gut. He needed to stay away from her. So what the hell was he doing? “And I’m not going to make excuses for you either.”

“Excuses?”

“Yeah. You’re the one who couldn’t say no to Mattie.”

She scowled, just like Sara always did whenever he was right and she didn’t want to admit it. “Well, who could?”

“Exactly.” In the shadows of the setting sun, he studied her expression, saw her bottom lip tremble. Nate felt his heart stall in his chest. His voice deepened as he checked the emotion that tried to break free. “Lady, you have five minutes to get your butt in the truck.”

She raised her chin in that annoyingly familiar manner and returned his glare. “Or what?”

“Do you really want to find out?”

The frosty glare turned downright chilly. Without uttering another word, she disappeared into the house. Nate couldn’t contain the smile that slipped out. He’d give her five minutes and then...

Maybe after all these years, he’d finally get to see the inside of her bedroom.

CHAPTER TEN

Thoughts of waking her mother tempered the urge to slam the front door. Jessie raced up the staircase and into her bedroom. Anger gnawed at her insides as she grabbed up the hairbrush and yanked it through her hair.

Ouch.

Glaring at her reflection in the mirror, she gingerly untangled the strands and set the brush aside. Down in the yard, the truck sat in clear sight of the window. She stared at it, recalling a hundred times he’d pulled up to the house and honked his horn.

And she’d go running.

Running into his arms without a thought to the consequences or the future. Just so sure of his love, she knew he’d never cast her aside for another.

After all these years, the puzzle she’d never been able to answer still teased her thoughts. Why hadn’t he come after her? Had she meant so little to him? Out of sight, out of mind? Had his love for her been nothing more than convenience? A warm body nearby?

Outside, the horn bleeped and Jessie jumped, startled. The unexpected but familiar excitement of his presence stole over her. Then the truck door flew open. Her stomach clenched in panic. She backed away, hiding in the shadows as he glanced up at the window. His mouth moved, drawing her complete and undivided attention. Lips, once soft with desire, were hard with frustration.

So maybe he should take the hint and leave her alone.

Downstairs, the front door creaked open. Footsteps softened by a light tread came up the stairs. The doorknob turned, the door swung open, and there he stood, annoyance etched on his face.

“You used to come running when I honked.”
He remembered.
“Whatever happened to that agreeable little girl?”

Forcing a smile to her lips, she tucked a strand of hair behind her ear. “If memory serves me right, you were never allowed up in my room. Have the rules changed?”

A reluctant smile broke across his face, the beautiful one that used to make her stomach do flip flops — and still did. It eased the annoyance from his taut lips and lit his eyes with laughter. He gave the room a quick, curious glance as he stepped inside and shut the door.

“We better be quiet or your dad’s libel to show up at the door with his shotgun.” The grin faded. “You ready?”

“I’m not going.”

He took a single step toward her, halted, leashed power in his rigid stance. “Why not?”

Jessie eyed the comfort of his wide shoulders and wished she could step into his arms. Instead, she turned toward the window as tears threatened. So many regrets...

“Hey, what’s wrong?” he asked softly. The floorboards creaked beneath his boots and she felt his hand on her shoulder easing her around to face him. “Remember how good we used to be together?”

He cupped her chin with his fingers, angling her head so she was forced to look him straight in the eye. Eyes so beautiful, so gentle and understanding, she wanted to leap into his arms, admit her awful secret, and let him comfort her.

But she knew that wouldn’t be the case. He’d turn from her, anger curling his lip, hatred clouding his eyes.

His gaze fell to her mouth and Jessie stopped breathing, stopped thinking. She couldn’t bear the thought of reaching out to him, of touching him, then having him push her away. As his head descended, the familiar welcome thrill of holding him close raced through her.

His mouth brushed hers, lightly, hesitantly. “Why do I still want you?”

She didn’t have an answer for his question, didn’t care about the answer as he captured her in his arms and dragged her against the full length of his tall frame. Chest to chest, thigh to thigh, she stared into his eyes and ached for the touch of his hands against her bare skin. He dipped his head, stroking her mouth with his lips, light and questing, testing. As the memory of shared passion infused her body with heat and desire, her eyelids fluttered shut.

For too long, she’d poured her passion into her music and ignored the yearnings of her body. But that had been her mother’s fantasy and Nate was hers. Here in his arms, she felt new life pour into her and envelope her with the magical wonder of the man she once loved.

The joy of being in his arms, however brief, overwhelmed her. A moment for her to remember and savor. A treasure to carry her through the lonely years ahead. As he eased his mouth away from hers, disappointment and despair swept through her, banishing the happiness.

She made a move to step back, forcing her hands away from his chest to her sides where they belonged. But he wouldn’t let her go, wouldn’t let her escape before a single tear trickled down her cheek. The roughness of his work-hardened thumb wiped the moisture away. He caught her by the chin and angled her face up. She forced her heavy eyelids up and met his steady gaze. Passion, nearly as familiar to her as her own, lingered in the stormy blue depths of his eyes.

“Sam had a rule about me coming up here. Now I remember why.”

She gave him a wobbly smile.

“What’s wrong, Jess?”

“Nothing.” She sniffled and pulled back. This time he let her go.

He stared at her, a long considering look that made her wish she’d run down to the truck when he had first honked the horn. At last, he shrugged and turned for the door. Before he left, he glanced at her over his shoulder.

“You coming or do I have to carry you out?”

“Nate, I don’t think it’s a very good idea.”

“After what just happened?” Passion lingered in his gaze. “It’s nothing that hasn’t happened before. Only this time, Jess, we’re older and wiser.”

She stopped breathing. “What are you saying?”

He shrugged his broad shoulders. Gave her that lopsided smile that tugged at her insides and turned her knees to mush. But there was a hardness in his eyes that set her teeth on edge. She waited for the bomb to drop.

His voice softened to an intimate whisper. “I remember how it used to be between us, Jess. Do you?” He glanced at his watch. “You’ve got five minutes, sweetheart. If you’re not in the truck by then, I’ll take that as an invitation to come back up here and finish what we started.”

As she watched him disappear around the corner, the sensible, sane side of her wanted to deny the answer that leapt to her lips. But the woman inside knew that if he touched her again, she’d burst into flames.

“Fine, I’m coming,” she grumbled to herself and followed him down the stairs.

Downstairs, she stopped to check on her mother.

The clinical appearance of the room made visiting all the more difficult, but Jessie understood the necessity of the equipment. She turned toward the twilight darkened living room. Nate stood in the open doorway, his voice a soft murmur as he explained their evening plans.

Beyond his tall frame and broad shoulders, she saw her dad on the couch, his head bowed, an old photo album on his lap.

Tears stung her eyes and she wondered how she could leave her dad behind, all alone in this big house. But he’d never leave the ranch. He was happy here, always busy, and he had Nate for company.

Two lonely men. The thought of them sitting on the porch with only each other for company nearly broke her heart.

She brushed past Nate, knelt on the hardwood floor at her dad’s feet, and covered his gnarled hand with her own. His gaze focused on her, his eyes lighting with pleasure.

“You look real pretty tonight, girl.”

Jessie squeezed his hand. He already looked so lonely, it hurt to watch him. “I could stay home with you, Dad. We could play some cards or something. Or maybe just sit on the porch swing like we used to and watch the sunset.”

He patted her hand and shook his head. “You go on.”

“Are you sure? I don’t mind staying and keeping you company.”

“Not exactly by myself, not yet. Your Ma’s still here with me.” Moisture filled his eyes and he brushed it away with the back of one hand. “And Harley sent over a pretty little nurse to babysit us. You go have yourself some fun. You deserve it.”

Jessie kissed her dad on the cheek and lingered over the familiar smells of the ranch that clung to him. “Don’t wait up. I’m not sure what time we’ll be home.”

“I trust that boy to bring you home in one piece, like he always did.” As Jessie pushed to her feet, Sam pinned Nate with a fatherly glare. “Take care of my girl, you hear, boy?”

Nate’s lips twitched with humor as she joined him at the entrance way and the deep timbre of his voice enveloped her in the warmth of his presence. “You know I will, sir. I’ll have her home in time for morning chores.”

“Morning chores?” she snorted. She took one last look at her dad, then pushed open the door and headed toward the truck, determined not to be a killjoy. “What about Hale? Won’t he be upset if I do his work?”

“Trust me. He’ll let you slop out the stables without complaint.”

Out at the truck, he opened the door for her and waited while she climbed inside, his steady gaze unnerving.

Nate Coltrane was protective and caring and sweeter than any man she had ever known. Her heart squeezed in her chest as she watched him close the door, walk around the truck, and climb in behind the steering wheel.

How would she survive a second parting?

She’d barely survived the first.

CHAPTER ELEVEN

Jessie gnawed on her bottom lip, unaware that she was staring at Nate until he glanced her way and the memory of his rock-her-world kiss slammed into her. Her heartbeat quickened and her body tingled to life.

She wanted to slide across the seat, into his arms, strip off the shirt and T-shirt he wore. Urge him to park somewhere private and straddle his lap. She was pretty sure there was enough room between his chest and the steering wheel to have her way with him.

“Uh, Jess? Earth to Jessie Adams. You okay?”

Her mouth opened, moved. No sound came out. No wonder he was looking at her so strangely, as though she’d just grown a third eye in the middle of her forehead.

Enough already
. She slouched back on the seat and attempted to concentrate on the events outside the truck instead of what was — or rather, what wasn’t — going on inside.

“You okay, Jess?” he asked again.

“Uh huh. It’s just a little hot in here, isn’t it?” She unrolled the window and fanned her face with her hand as she peered out at the street.

She’d forgotten about the unhurried routine of small town life and the slow drive down the main street with friends and neighbors calling out greetings. In comparison, life on the road was hectic and unsettling, but at least it gave her little time to think or remember the past.

A little red convertible pulled off the side street, its tires squealing as the driver swerved to avoid a collision. Nate stomped on the brakes of the truck and the sports car stopped beside them.

“Hey, Mr. Coltrane.” The pretty, young blonde at the wheel looked past him toward Jessie, curiosity dancing briefly across her face. “When’s Sara coming home?”

Sara? It seemed everyone knew Sara.

Out the corner of her eye, Jessie saw Nate shift on the seat, his jaw locking. “Not for a while, Lucy. I’ll have her call you.”

The girl opened her mouth again. Whatever she’d been about to say was lost in the roar of the engine as Nate tromped on the gas and sped off down the street. He steered the truck into a side parking lot, turned the key in the ignition, and the vehicle rolled to a silent stop under the shade of a Mayday tree.

“Maybe you ought to get one of those for yourself, Nate.”

A frown puckered his brow. “What?”

“A little sports car so you can really show off.”

“Yeah, just what the town needs. One more hothead on the road.”

He escaped before she could respond. Not that she wanted to pry into his personal affairs. Well, maybe she did. Maybe she wanted to know what Sara meant to him. But why? So she could return to her lonely life and feel sorry for herself? Or would knowing he had someone who loved him alleviate a small portion of the guilt she’d been shouldering all these years?

He strode across the pavement toward the partly built stage and stopped, stared at the ground, kicked a rock.

Had she lost her mind? Forgotten what it was like to lose something so precious? She was treading on dangerous ground, familiar emotions resurfacing. If she allowed herself to care about him again, would she be able to leave and still survive? She slid out of the truck and followed him across the parking lot. There were too many memories, both good and bad. If only they could forget the past and start over.

But that was impossible. Her gaze skimmed the breadth of his broad shoulders, the narrow hips, and she knew from experience that he was all muscle and brawn. A sigh escaped her, drawing his attention.

He thrust his hands into the pockets of his jeans, frowned back at her, and she experienced a moment of deja vu. The memory of an argument. Then afterwards, the thrill of making up, their emotions intensified by the realization of how close they’d come to losing each other.