Read A Lovely Sunday for Creve Coeur Online
Authors: Tennessee Williams
A Lovely Sunday for Creve Coeur (5 page)
HELENA
[
cutting in
]: Miss Bodenheifer, you certainly have a gift for the felicitous phrase such as “out you hoofed it to Liggett’s,” sorry, sorry, but it does evoke an image.
BODEY:
I know what you mean by “hoof it” since you keep repeating “heifer” for “hafer.” I’m not too dumb like which
you regard me to know why you’re struck so funny by “hoof it.”
HELENA:
You said you “hoofed it,” not me.
BODEY:
You keep saying “heifer” for “hafer.” Me, I’m a sensitive person with feelings I feel, but sensitive to you I am not. Insults from you bounce off me. I just want you to know that you come here shaking your tin cup at the wrong door.
[
As a soft but vibrant counterpoint to this exchange, Sophie, sobbing and rolling her eyes like a
religieuse
in a state of sorrowful vision, continues her slow shuffle toward Dorothea as she repeats in German an account of her violent ejection by Helena
.]
DOROTHEA
[
breathlessly
]: Bodey, what is she saying? Translate and explain to her I have no knowledge of German.
HELENA:
Babbling, just lunatic babbling!
BODEY:
One minute, one minute, Dotty. I got to explain to this woman she’s wasting her time here and
yours—and
had the moxie to slam Sophie out of the door.
HELENA:
Miss Bodenheifer, it’s useless to attempt to intimidate me. . . . I would like the use of your phone for a moment.
Then—
DOROTHEA:
No calls on the phone!
BODEY:
Dotty don’t want this phone used; she’s expecting a call to come in, but there is a pay phone at Liggett’s three blocks east on West Pine and Pearl.
HELENA:
Drugstores are shut on Sundays!
DOROTHEA:
Quiet! Listen! All! This thing’s getting out of hand!
HELENA:
I want only to call a taxi for myself and for Dorothea. She’s trapped here and should be removed at once. You may not know that just two weeks after she came to Blewett she collapsed on the staircase, and the staff doctor examined her and discovered that Dorothea’s afflicted with
neuro-circulatory
asthenia.
[
Dorothea has disappeared behind the sofa. Miss Gluck is looking down at her with lamentations
.]
MISS GLUCK
: BODEY.
BODEY:
Moment, Sophie.
MISS GLUCK:
Dotty, Dotty . . .
HELENA:
What is she saying? Where’s Dorothea?
BODEY:
Dotty?
MISS GLUCK:
Hier, auf dem Fussboden. Ist fallen
.
HELENA:
This Gluck creature has thrown Dorothea onto the floor.
BODEY:
Gott im
—!
Wo ist
—Dotty?
HELENA:
The Gluck has flung her to the floor behind the sofa!
BODEY:
Dotty!
HELENA:
Dorothea, I’m calling us a cab. Is she conscious?
DOROTHEA:
Mebaral—tablet—quick!
BODEY:
Mebarals, where?
[
Sophie wails loudly
.]
DOROTHEA:
My pocketbook!
BODEY:
Hold on now, slowly,
slowly—
DOROTHEA:
Mebaral! Tablets!
HELENA:
My physician told me those tablets are only prescribed for persons
with—extreme
nervous tension and asthenia.
BODEY:
Will you goddam shut up?
—Dotty
, you just need
to—
HELENA:
What she needs is to stop these strenuous exercises and avoid all future confrontations with that lunatic from upstairs!
BODEY:
Dotty, let me lift you.
DOROTHEA:
Oh, oh, noooo,
I—can’t, I—I
am
paralyzed, Bodey!
BODEY:
HEY, YOU
BROOKS-IT
, TAKE DOTTY’S OTHER ARM. HELP ME CARRY HER TO HER BED WILL YUH?
[
Sophie is moaning through clenched fists
.]
HELENA:
All right, all right, but then I shall call my physician!
[
Dorothea is carried into the bedroom and deposited on the bed. Sophie props pillows behind her
.]
DOROTHEA:
Meb—my
meb . . .
BODEY:
Tablets. Bathroom. In your pocketbook.
[
Bodey rushes into the bathroom, then out with a small bottle. Dorothea raises a hand weakly and Bodey drops tablets in it
.]
Dotty, don’t swallow, that’s three tablets!
DOROTHEA:
My sherry to wash it down
with—
BODEY:
Dotty, take out the
two extra tablets
, Dotty!
HELENA:
Sherry? Did she say sherry? Where is it?
DOROTHEA:
There, there.
BODEY:
Dotty, open your mouth, I got to take out those extras!
HELENA:
No glass, you must drink from the bottle.
BODEY:
NO! NOOOO!
HELENA:
STOP CLUTCHING AT ME!
[
Miss Gluck utters a terrified wail. Dorothea drinks from the bottle and falls back onto the pillows with a gasp
.]
BODEY
[
so angry she speaks half in German
]: You
Schwein
, you bitch!
Alte böse Katze
. [
She then goes on in English
.] You washed three tablets down Dotty!
DOROTHEA:
Now will you BOTH get out so I can breathe!
HELENA:
The door’s obstructed by Gluck.
BODEY:
Sophie, go out, Sophie, go out of here with me for coffee and crullers!
[
Sobbing, Sophie retreats. Bodey grabs a strong hold of Helena’s wrist
.]
HELENA:
Let go of my wrist. Oh, my God, you have broken. . . . I heard a bone snap in
my—!
BODEY:
WALK! OUT! MOVE IT! . . .
HELENA
[
turning quickly about and retreating behind the sofa
]: Miss Bodenheifer, you are a
one-woman
demonstration of the aptness of the term “Huns” for Germans. . . . And, incidentally, what you broke was not my wrist but my Cartier wristwatch, a birthday present from my Cousin
Dee-Dee
; you shattered the crystal, and you’ve broken the minute hand and bent the two others. I am afraid the repair bill will cost you considerably more than keeping Dorothea in Golden Glow Shampoo.
BODEY:
It’s all right, Sophie, set down right here and I’ll. . . . Coffee’s still hot for you. Have a coupla crullers. Blow your nose on this napkin
and—
[
Helena laughs tonelessly
.]
What’s funny, is something funny? You never been depressed, no sorrows in your life ever, yeh, and you call yourself a human.
HELENA:
Really, this is fantastic as
the—color
scheme of this room or
the—view
through the windows.
[
In the bedroom, Dorothea has staggered from the bed and stumbled to the floor
.]
DOROTHEA:
Bodey.
HELENA:
Dorothea.
BODEY
[
calling through
]: Dotty.
HELENA:
You really must let me check on her condition.
DOROTHEA
[
in the bedroom
]: Don’t forget . . . phone call.
BODEY:
No, Dotty.
DOROTHEA
[
faintly, clinging to something
]: Tell Miss Brookmire I’ve retired for the day.
HELENA:
What?
BODEY:
She’s not coming out. She’s not coming out till you leave
here—
[
Bodey bolts the bedroom door
.]
HELENA:
I beg to differ. She
will
and I’ll sit here till she does!
[
Miss Gluck has taken a bite of a cruller, dunked in coffee, and begins to blubber, the
coffee-soaked
cruller dribbling down her chin
.]
BODEY:
Look, you upset Sophie!
MISS GLUCK:
Eine—Woche
vor
—
Sonntag
—
meine Mutter
—
BODEY
[
comfortingly
]:
Ich weiss
, Sophie,
ich weiss
.
MISS GLUCK:
Gestorben!
BODEY:
But she went
sudden
, huh, Sophie? [
She crouches beside
Miss Gluck, removing the dribblings of cruller and coffee from her mouth and chin
.]
HELENA:
I don’t understand the language, and the scene appears to be private.
BODEY:
Yeh, keep out of it. [
She turns to Miss Gluck
.]
—Your
mother, she didn’t hang on like the doctor thought she would, Sophie. Now, face it, it was better sudden, no big hospital bill, just went and is waiting for you in Heaven.
HELENA:
With open arms, I presume, and with coffee and crullers.
BODEY:
So, Sophie, just be grateful that she went quick with no pain.
MISS GLUCK
[
grotesquely tragic
]:
Nein, nein, sie hat geschrien!
I woke up runnin’!
BODEY:
To her bed, you reached it and she was dead. Just one scream, it was
over—wasn’t
that a mercy?
[
Helena laughs
.]
Sophie, honey, this woman here’s not sympathetic. She laughs at sorrow; so maybe you better take the coffee, the
cruller—here’s
another—upstairs
, Sophie, and when we get back from the Creve Coeur picnic, I will bring you beautiful flowers,
schöne Blume
. Then I’ll come up and sing to you in
German—I
will sing you to sleep.
[
Miss Gluck slowly rises with coffee and crullers. Bodey conducts her gently to the door
.]
MISS GLUCK
[
crying out
]:
Ich bin allein, allein! In der Welt, freundlos!
BODEY:
No, no, Sophie, that is negative thinking.
MISS GLUCK:
Ich habe niemand in der Welt!
BODEY:
Sophie, God is with you, I’m with you. Your mother, all your relations are waiting for you in Heaven!
[
Shepherding Miss Gluck into the hall, Bodey repeats this assurance in German
.]
HELENA:
Sometimes despair is just being realistic, the only logical thing for certain persons to
feel
. [
She addresses herself with a certain seriousness, now
.] Loss. Despair. I’ve faced them and actually they
have—fortified
and protected, not overcome me at all . . .
BODEY
[
in the hall with Miss Gluck
]: Okay?
Verstehst du
, Sophie?
HELENA
[
still ruminating privately
]: The weak. The strong. Only important division between living creatures. [
She nods birdlike affirmation
.]
[
Miss Gluck remains visible in the hall, afraid to return upstairs
.]
MISS GLUCK:
Allein, allein
.
[
There is a change in the light. Helena moves a small chair downstage and delivers the following to herself
.]
HELENA:
Allein, allein
means alone, alone. [
A frightened look appears in her eyes
.] Last week I dined alone, alone three nights in a row. There’s nothing lonelier than a woman dining alone, and although I loathe preparing food for myself, I cannot bear the humiliation of occupying a restaurant table for one. Dining
au solitaire!
But I would rather starve than reduce my social
standards by accepting dinner invitations from that middle-aged gaggle of preposterously vulgar old maids that wants to suck me into their group despite my total abhorrence of all they stand for. Loneliness in the company of five intellectually destitute spinsters is simply loneliness multiplied by five . . .
[
There is a crash in the hallway
.]
DOROTHEA
[
from the bedroom
]: Is it the phone?
HELENA:
Another visit so soon? Miss Bodenheifer, your bereaved friend from upstairs is favoring you with another visit.
MISS GLUCK
[
wildly
]:
Mein Zimmer is gespukt, gespukt!
HELENA:
“Spooked, spooked”?
BODEY:
Sophie, your apartment isn’t haunted.
HELENA:
Perhaps if you went up with her, it would despook the apartment.
BODEY:
Aw, no, I got to stay down and keep a sharp eye on
you
.
HELENA:
Which means that she will remain here?
BODEY:
Long as she pleases to. What’s it to you? She got nothin’ contagious. You can’t catch heartbreak if you have got no heart.
HELENA:
May I suggest that you put her in the back yard in the sun. I think that woman’s complexion could stand a touch of color.
BODEY:
I am puttin’ her nowhere she don’t want to be. How
about you settin’ in the back yard? Some natural color would do your face good for a change.