A Christmas Memory (7 page)

“I don’t know about all that,” she said over her shoulder.

About that time, a loud bang came from the front of the house and the door slammed. “Ma…where are you?”

“Back here, Luke,” Maggie answered, calling out over her shoulder.

A moment later an older version of Adam blocked the doorway. The
whole
doorway.

“Hey, little brother, mooching food again, I see,” The big man, I presumed to be Luke, addressed Adam.

Adam got up, mouth still full of pie, and hugged and then kissed his look-a-like brother, right on the lips.

“You want some coffee and a piece of pie, Luke?” Maggie asked.

“I’d love some, Ma, but Andrea and the boys are waiting on me over at the school,” the big man said as he picked up his mother, kissing her on both cheeks and then giving her a quick peck on the lips. “I only stopped to drop off that ham for ya. I was gonna drive it around back here, but some big truck is in my way.” He grinned at Adam. “And who do we have here?” he asked, looking down at me.

I felt a bit shell-shocked, and it was about to get worse. Before Adam could introduce me, another loud bang came from the front of the house, as the front door slammed shut. “Ma…where are ya?”

“Back here,” rang out a chorus, as all three Suttons answered.

Once again, another obvious Sutton blocked the doorway. He didn’t look quite as much like Adam and Luke, but there was no doubting the three of them were brothers.

“What are you two doing here?” he asked, hugging first Luke and then Adam. He also kissed both his brothers, again on the mouth. “Hey, Ma…How’s the most beautiful woman in town?” Like his brothers, he picked her up and kissed her smartly before gently placing her back on her feet.

“I stopped off to drop off a ham, and Adam is here mooching food again.”

“Am not,” Adam huffed, throwing a punch to his older brother’s shoulder.

“Oww,” Luke feigned in mock pain.

“If you boys are going to roughhouse, just take it on outside.” Mrs. Sutton turned, a definite look of threat on her face. “I’m in no mood for your messin’ around.”

“We’re good Ma,” Adam said. “Guys, I’d like for you to meet a real close friend of mine, Jonathan Jones, J.J. for short.”

“Hey, I’m Matt,” the middle brother introduced himself.

Both giants stuck out their hands; I was hoping they wouldn’t crush mine as they were shaking it. They didn’t.

“So little brother finally went out and got ’im one, huh?” Matt said teasingly, thumping Adam on the shoulder, not so unlike what Adam had done to me before I got him to stop.

Adam blushed almost purple, something I’d not seen before. Luke was smiling, that same damn smile, as he looked between Adam and me.

“Sure ’nuf. Ma…Adam’s done gone out and got himself a beau!”

“Shush now, it’s not polite to embarrass the comp’ny.” She pushed both men out of the way, refilling my coffee mug. “Don’t you pay them heathens no mind now, J.J. If they get out of line, you just let me know. I know how to deal with them.”

I don’t know if I was blushing as hard, or as much as Adam, but my face felt hot enough to fry an egg on my forehead.

“Who’s gonna help me get this big-ass ham in?” Luke asked, just as his mother slapped him up side his head. “Oww, Ma.”

“It wouldn’t hurt if you don’t use that kinda language in my kitchen.”

Adam and Matt both snickered as they followed their brother out the door.

Once all the big men were gone, Maggie sat down at the table next to me, taking my hand. “I can see what Adam was talking about now.” She patted the top of my hand. “The one thing I know about Adam is that he is patient, and waits for what he wants, and he’s waited quite a while now.” Smiling at me, she continued, “I get a feeling about some folks, and I can tell you’re a keeper. Just don’t go and hurt my boy. I know he’s big and he’s rowdy, but he has a heart of gold, and it can get broke real easy, I’m afraid.”

I was sitting there in disbelief. Here was Adam’s mother talking to me like Adam and me were a couple or something, or I was a future in-law, and we’d only just met.

“I love all my boys, but there’s always been something special about Adam.” There was a faraway look in her eyes. “It nearly killed him when his NFL career was over. That boy liked playing ball more than anything else in this world.” Her focus came back to me. “You’ll be good for him. I can feel it. He’s been alone way too long.”

She stood up, went back to the counter, and picked up her rolling pin to finish what she was doing.

“You like cookies, J.J.?”

“Uh…Yes, ma’am.” My voice squeaked a bit as I answered her. “Oatmeal raisin would be my favorite, I think, especially if there’s a lot of ginger in them.”

She looked over her shoulder, squinted at me, and smiled. “You cook then. Only someone who cooks would know that.”

I knew I was blushing again.

“No cause to be embarrassed,” she chuckled. “My husband was a fine cook, as good as me, I’d say. It’s a good thing you are; Adam can’t boil water, Lord knows I’ve tried to help him. I don’t know how he doesn’t starve to death.”

“I think he lives primarily on pizza and Chinese delivery,” I offered.

She laughed hardily. “I wouldn’t be a bit surprised.”

The back door opened and all three men entered, the noise of them ribbing each other loud enough to make the dishes rattle in the cabinet.

“You get that ham in the refrigerator out in the garage?” Maggie asked, not turning around, or commenting on the noise.

In unison the three answered, “Yes, Ma’am.”

“Ma…love ya, but I gotta git.” Luke hugged his mother from behind, kissing her on the head. “Holler if you need anything else, okay?”

“Yes dear, and thank you for picking that ham up for me. I’d never have gotten it out of the car.”

Luke hugged each brother, punching each playfully in various places afterward.

When he came to me, he reached down, pulled me up into a big bear hug, and lifted me clean off the floor. “Good to meet ya, J.J., we’ll see ya next weekend, I’m sure. Bye, all.” Then he was gone.

“I gotta go as well, Ma. I'm meeting Leanne for dinner,” Matt followed, kissing his mother on the top of the head as well, and then hugging her, also from behind.

Matt turned to me. I was still standing, stunned from Luke’s attention. “It was great to finally meet you, J.J.” He also gave me a big bear hug, not quite picking me up, but kissing both my cheeks.

When he left, leaving only Adam, his mother and I, I sat down, more than a little unsettled. First, it was the physical attention from this family, but it was that they all seemed to know about me which I found a bit unsettling.

Adam must have noticed. “You okay, J.J.?” He looked at me, a little concerned.

“Yeah, I… well I…” I didn’t know how to put into words what I was thinking or feeling.

“Oh…I guess I should have warned you.” Adam snickered. “We’re all a bit crazy around here, and big on hugs.”

“The world would be a better place if there were more hugs given,” Maggie said, without turning around. “You boys staying for dinner?”

“No, Ma…J.J. has promised to cook me a big steak dinner,” Adam bragged.

“Well, isn’t that nice of him?” She turned wiping her hands on her apron. “If he cooks…”

“Yes Ma’am, I know. If he cooks, I clean. Got it.” He grinned broadly.

“That’s my good boy,” Maggie said, reaching up and pinching his cheek.

She turned to me, opened her arms, expecting the customary hug. I stepped into her arms. There was a quiet calm that settled over me, unlike anything I’d ever experienced. I eagerly hugged her back. Pulling away slightly, she again kissed both cheeks smiling, her eyes bright and shiny.

Before letting me go, she whispered into my ear, “Welcome to the family, son.”

Adam then swept her up in his arms, planting kisses all over her face, making her scrunch up her face and fuss for him to put her down.

As he placed her gently on the floor, she slapped him playfully on the chest. “You boys have fun and stay out of trouble. You hear?”

“Yes Ma’am,” we both answered.

“Bye Ma…Love ya!”

“Bye, Mrs. Sutton…uh, I mean, Maggie. It was nice meeting you, and thank you for the coffee and pie.”

“You’re more than welcome, J.J.” She smiled warmly. “Come back anytime.”

On the way back to Adam’s place, he told me a little about growing up with his brothers.

“It was weird seeing my brothers start dating when I knew I was different. I mean, I knew I was supposed to start liking girls, but I never looked at girls like that. When I started having fantasies about guys, I knew I was gay.”

I didn’t comment. I only listened, thinking about my own experience when I’d come to understand the same thing about myself.

The expression on Adam’s face was relaxed. “I was terrified someone would find out, especially Luke and Matt. At first, I thought I would eventually start liking girls, but by the time I was fourteen, I knew I wouldn’t.” Adam glanced over at me, his face still calm.

I nodded, knowing exactly what he meant, as I had also had the same feelings.

“Anyway, I went through this period of hating myself, scared all the time that someone might find out, especially my brothers. My grades fell. I was screwing up at football practice, my head wasn’t in the game, and I started avoiding everyone.” Adam paused, sighing heavily, pain showing on his face briefly. “One night Luke came storming into my room, demanding to know what was going on with me. Said that Coach was about to bench me, which, for some reason, Luke felt, was a reflection on him. I was the only freshman first stringer. I’m sure you’ve noticed, but Luke, Matt and I are all pretty big guys, and we had a reputation of being the biggest bad-asses on the field. They used to call us ‘The Wall’.” He chuckled.

I had to smile as I imagined the three big Sutton boys as bigger than life teenagers. It must have been quite a sight.

“Luke busting in like that must have been the last straw, because I started bawling like a baby, which freaked Luke out. He went and got our dad, and then the two of them were there trying to figure out what the hell was wrong with me.”

I couldn’t relate to this part since I never told my mother I was gay. I never told anyone until I was in college, and then it was my best friend Alicia, who finally pressed me as to why I never dated. Reaching over, I put my hand on Adam’s knee, showing my support.

“Dad sat on the bed and started trying to figure out what was going on, pushing me, until I blurted it out that I liked guys. Luke was still standing there, and he freaked out, saying there was no way I could be a
faggot
.”

I was learning Adam’s different smiles, and this was a new one. It was kind of quirky, his nose wrinkling up a bit.

“Dad stood up and slapped the bejesus out of Luke. Luke was so surprised, his mouth hung open so far I’m surprised his teeth didn’t fall out. By that time, Matt and my mother had come running, wondering what all the commotion was about.” Adam took a deep breath before he went on. “Dad told everyone in the room that no matter what, we were a family, and we were going to respect each other for who they were, period. That’s when Ma asked what was going on.”

Adam stopped for a minute. I gently squeezed his leg, encouraging him to go on. I was fascinated by his story, already knowing the eventual outcome, but anxious to hear the details.

Adam looked over at me and grinned sheepishly before going on. “So all eyes were on me, waiting for me to spill the beans. At that time, I would have rather had cut off my right arm than disappoint my mom. She sat next to me and said that no matter what it was, she would always be my mom, and she would love me. So I told her I was gay. She hugged me and said—and I’ll never forget it—‘Well then, I hope you meet a nice boy someday’.”

“Wow.” I was stunned, but at the same time I could see Maggie Sutton saying that, not at all surprised.

“Yeah, tell me about it.” Adam grinned, eyes still on the road, as he remembered. “Then she told my brothers that my being gay wasn’t any different than if I had blue eyes. It was just something about me that I could no more change than that. Then she threatened them, and as I’m sure you could tell, she doesn’t play around with idle threats. She told my brothers this was something extremely personal. She threatened that if she ever got wind of them saying anything to anyone about this without my permission, they would have to answer to her, and that was something that none of them wanted, not even Dad.”

I laughed out loud, thinking of the small woman I had met a short time ago, taking on her monster-sized sons and them being afraid of her.

Adam glanced at me, laughing along. “Yeah, that little woman can hold her own, and she didn’t let any of us get away with much.” When we both stopped laughing, thinking of Maggie Sutton and her iron fist, he finished his story. “So things went on. Matt didn’t seem to think anything of it, and carried on his picking on me as he usually did. It wasn’t until this guy, Michael O’Neil, a senior that I’d bumped off first string, decided to try and take me on that Luke came around. O’Neil did an illegal tackle during practice, intending to injure me out and put me on the bench. Well…Luke rushed him like a wild bull, tackling him so hard I’m sure he saw stars for a week. He told O’Neil that if he ever tried anything like that again, he would have to answer to him. Matt was there by then, backing Luke up. From then on, everyone knew that if they took on one of us, they took on
all
of us. It was that simple.” Adam had that goofy smile on his face, making me smile as well. “Ever since then… we’ve all been real tight.” Adam shrugged his shoulders as if that was just the way it was, the way it was meant to be.